If you are reading this, it means you either know me on here and saw my signature message or you stumbled across this... Unless you are curious as to my hiatus, you are best off just skipping this.

Right now, I'm hitting a really rough patch of good old real life. I have so many things to think about from the various tests I have in the next few weeks to wondering if I will even have enough money to pay for school to the physical pain my mouth is in. I'm completely overwhelm by it all.

So I'm taking a little hiatus. I need to completely refocus my life. I need to study for final exams. I need to learn the material that I could very well possibly need for the rest of my life. There are so many things I need to do in so little time. So I need to just take a step back and truly re-evaluate my life and where I'm going with all this.

Either way, thanks for reading this.

[QUOTE]I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed[/QUOTE]

I feel like so many things are falling apart. I feel like I'm falling apart. I just feel like I've lost control of myself and my life. This isn't the first time and I doubt that it is the last.

Part of it has to do with my lack of spine, I guess. I've never been strong against my friends in certain aspects. Saying no to things like alcohol is easy compared to things that may actually get people mad or hurt.

That's really always been my problem. Ever since I was in elementary school, I've always gone along with my friends. I guess my dependence on having friends makes me follow... Hell, even in choosing a college came down to friends. How pathetic is that?

I feel like I keep disappointing myself left and right... I just don't know what to do anymore.

[QUOTE]Stuck on a roller coaster
Can't get off this ride

You change your mind
Like a girl changes clothes

Cause you're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down
You're wrong when it's right
It's black and it's white
[/QUOTE]

Sometimes, my life if definitely like this song. Life definitely seems a little bi-polar right now... Along with some occasional random thoughts.

Such as today, I suddenly wanted an ear cartilage piercing. Very odd for me, anyway.

It does get tiring sometimes. Going from one thought to a completely different thought. The quick changing thoughts makes me a little depressed sometimes but happy at other times. Who knows, maybe I'm an undiagnosed case of bi-polar disorder... Well, a very mild bi-polar disorder anyway ^^;

[QUOTE]But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that
I will fall for you
Over again
Don’t make me change my mind
Or I won’t live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You’re impossible to find [/QUOTE]

What I would give for a boy to sing/say something like that to me... I'm twenty and I have never even been on a date... I guess it bothers me because I see how happy some girls about their boyfriends (even if I question the relationships in general). Maybe it's just cause I'm a little lonely. Who knows...

When I first started blogging, most of my posts had lyrics to the song that was currently running through my head at the time... I've decided that I want to go back to my roots and utilize the wonderful world of music.

[QUOTE]Now oh so easily you're over me
Gone is love
It's me that ought to be moving on
You're not adorable
I want something un-ignorable.[/QUOTE]

I kind of like the quirky-ness and how some of the lines just seem to make no sense. Yet the singer is able to make it fit together... and you still notice it.

It does get a little repetitive at points such as:

[QUOTE]I ain't freakin', I ain't fakin' this[/QUOTE]

The band seems interesting enough. I've never heard of "melodramatic popular song" as a category for music... Which makes me wonder if there is any other musician out there who claims to be categorized like that...

I guess I kind of can imagine myself singing a song like this and having the attitude to pull it off.

One thing I notice is that the lyrics in the music that I listen to have no correlation to my life. A lot of them talk about love and heartbreak, yet I can't relate to it at all... I guess that I find it ironic that I really love a song and can't relate to the character of the story at all.