Pa-pancake, honestly, I'm not worried about the financial end of things. Their great grandpap owns this house we live in, and he's already said I could stay here with the babies, if I could get custody of them. A place to live, food on the table, the bills all paid, that's what the judge would be interested in, and it's all covered. That is actually the least of my concerns right now.

As for signing the kids over, I know my daughter would sign them over, if it were completely up to her, but their dad will not do so, and I told her that until and unless she gains full legal and physical custody of the kids, I do not want her signing her rights to the kids away, because that would open it up for him to take them.

The way things are going right now, however, when I am able to build up a case against them, I will file for custody of both kids, without their consent. Their father has nothing to do with them. He spends the day hidden in his room, and does not spend any time with the kids. He does nothing for them, unless I specifically ask him to do something I am unable to do. Even then, he doesn't always do it...if he doesn't feel like doing it, he will make up some feeble excuse as to why he can't do it.

Getting my daughter to do anything for these kids, I practically have to twist her arm to get her to do it...she is definitely worse than their father in that aspect. Dinner time and bath time are her only 'chores' for taking care of these kids, but even those, she does not perform well, nor does she perform them nearly as often as she should. I'm just really fed up with both of them.

They don't care about their children, and now their Dad is talking about moving up to Idaho with his brother on the 1st, with no regards as to when he will see his children again, or how his sudden disappearance from their lives will affect them. My daughter is so much more interested in her own personal life right now and is being very selfish and self centered, it isn't funny. It's all about them...forget everyone else.

Fizi the kids are lucky to have you. And The parents will regret what they are doing later.. my parents lost me as a kid and they still regret it to this day.

I honestly don't think that their father would care for their wellbeing or even consider taking custody of them after you put it that way but you never know because it seems like he could very well want to have them just to get the financial support given to to raise the children by the government. Somehow the situation is not really a win win thing the way I see it. Someone will have to be a loser here. I really pity the children that they were brought into this world by two irresponsible human beings who now only think about themselves. Really, it still baffles me that people would bother having children if they knew they were not going to allocate any time for them at all =.='' And its worrisome that the children might grow up and emulate their parents because now at their age, they would be absorbing the actions of their parents and they must be wondering what they did wrong or who really is their caretaker. Without you being there for them, they could end up being very troubled children >.<''

I really do not know what else to say. I just can't imagine such horrible parents because you mentioned that when they were young, they were in love, so wanting a baby together etc anfd they both ended up like this... >.<''

They planned both pregnancies, Pa-pancake, even though they were both still in high school. My daughter knew what the consequences would be...we had talked about it plenty of times at home before she ever even knew him.

She actually had a miscarriage before having my granddaughter, and she became depressed after losing her first baby. She then got pregnant a second time...her boyfriend had graduated from high school at that point. His grandpap tells me how responsible he used to be, always doing things without complaint and only had to be asked once.

My daughter used to be a straight A student and could have had full scholarships for college, but threw it away to 'drop out' of high school during her pregnancy. She did end up getting her GED finally, after starting the process three different times, but did not follow through the first two times. I was surprised and proud of her for finally following through with the process and hoped that was a sign she was improving, but to no avail.

She started college twice...once with Art Institute of Pittsburgh, the second was a local beauty college, and both times she just simply stopped attending her classes. She did not call anyone to let them know she was withdrawing or anything of the sort, she just stopped going. Needless to say, she is no longer eligible to apply for student aid because she blew it, twice. She does not follow through with anything, she makes no commitments to anyone, and even if she did, she does not follow through on them.

Their father is on SSI for ADHD, but he does not seek medical care for his ADHD, nor will he take medication for it. His social skills are severely lacking and he cannot hold down a job for more than a few days at a time.

When my daughter first got together with him, my words to her was she had better be prepared to be the bread winner of the family, because he is never going to do so. She just nodded and agreed with me that she knew that was the case.

Even with her jobs, she has been non-commital, and she doesn't stay long at one place...she bounces from job to job to job, which means she is not going to move up at all, and will probably eventually simply run out of employers to go to. I am surprised anyone even hires her, and this one call center she has worked at, has hired her three different times, which just boggles my mind.

I just don't understand, I mean his Pap says he used to be so responsible. I know she used to be so responsible. The two of them got together and just threw all responsibility out the window...just like that? It's like, what happened to them? I just cannot believe how foolish they both are.

Why they would even plan to have kids in the first place, is beyond me, since they both obviously have no interest in being a parent. With their father, it's all a control issue...he won't give them up, because to do so would admit his incompetency as their father. Never mind that he is incompetent. He is more worried about how it makes him look than he is about their well being.

Ahh I hate that.. I wish I could say or do more to help but I would end up sounding harsh and mean.. I just hope the kids get into a better situation and Fizi I support you whole heartedly.

I think I have mentioned harsh and mean things already. I am so sorry if I said anything to insult anyone you care about... I hope you can forgive me if I have stepped over the line. I sometimes can't seem to shut my mouth when I feel passionate abut something.

You have mentioned about how your daughter has changed drastically but this is the first I have heard of the father... We have a same for these kind of men in Chinese, they are called 'Tai Lam Yan', meaning men who act all big but do not act on what they are. they are autocratic, do not want to lose 'face/ego' but do not perform up to what they believe themselves to be. He only thinks about himself really. I don't think he cares about anything else. It makes me wonder if he was brought up that way as well...

I find that they really should be grateful to even get jobs! So many people are currently unemployed its scary and they can just throw away their jobs just like that. I have not started working yet and I am dead afraid to go out there looking for a job >.<''

*sighs* I feel kind of fumed...

Yes the job thing kills me it is impossible to get a job where I live right now.. even fast food is not hiring.. so to trow a job away baffles my mind.

Yeah, the number of people unemployed in the states is scary because its always being reported on CNN... the situation is better where I am but its still not as good. My friend graduated in January with amazing grades and really, she is a sociable person with a good attitude and yet somehow, she cannot get a job! A lot of my friends are just working under their parents or getting jobs through connections now. Its too hard to go for interviews now...

Yeah thats how it is here.. one of my friends said something snide about my husband being unemployed... and I had to remind him that he couldn't get a job untill his daddy steped in and got him a connection.. he shut up quickly after that.

Hey everyone go look at Kattys quest thread it is all set up now.

Yeah, its hard to survive without a job. My dad is now trying his best to support all of us. My sister was lucky to have gotten a good job because of my aunt. I wish I am lucky to get a job too! My boyfriend is also unemployed now and I am really worried for him because he has to pay for his car still.

Oh and I am off to view Katty's quest page now! thanks for the heads up! :)

Goood Morning people!

Hey there stormiie!

Is it morning where you are?

Good morning, care bear!

Pa-pancake, I don't think you could say anything about them that I haven't already said. I am just fed up with them already and their stupid selfish behaviors. I will not take offense to anything you say about them because honestly, it's the truth, sad as that may be. I mean, sure, I love my daughter, but I love the daughter I raised, and she seems non-existent anymore. As for their father, his mother abandoned him to his grandpap and grandmother when he was 5 years old. Pap raised him, and Pap, although he has some strange ideas about things sometimes, he's a good man.

Yes, I agree too, with both of you, about her throwing her jobs away like that. I mean, they are definitely not the best jobs in the world, but at least it's work. What's she going to do when people do stop hiring her?

Yeah, it would be impossible for you to stop loving your daughter even though she is a different person. It must really be hurtful that she has changed so much. Even with so much guidance, she is now someone completely different. And as for the father, I guess I sort of understand his situation because he was left as a child and he feels his children can grow up the same way... It really is quite a mixed up situation here with all these internal family problems...

Yeah, future employers will always look at past jobs and wonder how a person can lose their job so many times. There really is a limit to how much an employer can understand and be tolerant about a person losing their job...

Yep it's morning for me.
I really should be getting ready and cleaning to go see my boyfriend but I am feeling to lazy to clean :|
I wish he would come to me today XD

How are you both?

I am suprised to catch fizi online :D

Hehe yeah, I'm usually in bed at this time. My whole sleeping schedule is so messed up right now. I have my daughter to thank for that too, lol.

I think, Pa-pancake, that she is able to get away with it so much, because I don't think she tells the new employers about the previous ones. I think she tells them she was a home maker, so the employers don't know about the other ones. I honestly do not know what she told them at the one place, for them to hire her back twice after she left. It just boggles my mind that they gave her two more chances in the first place.

Aww I am sure it will be back to normal soon?
Hopefully?

Haha, care bear, I don't know if anything will be back to normal again for a long time to come, if ever. What is normal, anyways? :P

Ahh normal is what you make it I think. >.<

Agreed with Ivvy there.
It's also like perfection is what you make it.

And you make your own experience things like that. :)

Indeed.
You should never wake up and go "Today will be a bad day".
Because something bad will happen during the day.
It's all mind tricks (:

Fizi my dear...

Up, up, and away... Your thread was getting to close to the bottom so I just figured I would do something about it here and now...

Once someone comes online I will ask them to bump me off of the second page but first I have to go for a while so that I can eat something... I will be back in a few hours...

Ahh Kats page is on the second page! o.o I shall go and revive it for you!

Hey there Fiz, I'm just dropping by to say hello to you and here's hoping you have a great day ahead! :)