First of all I apologize if this has already been done! I'm still pretty new to Mene.

I've been watching Jon and Kate plus 8 on TLC for months now, and have always loved the show and their family. Recently they started to air a show about the Duggers who have 17 (soon 18) kids. There are plenty of other specials about families with 15+ kids.

Prompts:
Do you think this is right?
Do you think the kids have a quality life when they're competing for parental attention?
Many of these families are home schooled, how will that affect them?
Does it make a difference when big families are due to artificial insemination or other drugs versus families that don't believe in contraception?

I'm sure you'll be able to think of other aspects as well. I personally am amazed at big families, but also a little scared that some parents might be more addicted to the unconditional love and attention children bring, and the fear of going against Jesus and using a condom. :o What do you think?

I think it's fine if they want to have a large family. My mom came from a family of eight (four brothers, three sisters) and some of her brothers and sisters have large families as well. I have around 80 cousins on my mom's side alone and it's a lot of fun. I only want to have 2-3 kids though lol. Large families are a lot of work.

I think that if the parents can support a lot of children, both finacially and mentally, then they should be able to have as many as they want. But some people really shouldn't have that many kids (such as those who can barely stand one kid).

Originally Posted by Angel Naomi

I think it's fine if they want to have a large family. My mom came from a family of eight (four brothers, three sisters) and some of her brothers and sisters have large families as well. I have around 80 cousins on my mom's side alone and it's a lot of fun. I only want to have 2-3 kids though lol. Large families are a lot of work.

That's very true. I only have seven siblings, and they drive me up the wall a lot. They are a lot of fun when they have not been sneaking energy bars, though. My baby brother is the cutest little boy, so we don't mind his craziness that much. Us older kids do have a lot of responsibilities though.

I think it depend's more on the household and how they go about thing's. I don't advise every family to do it. But if they can and everything seem's to go smothly, dependant on who is percieving it. Well then more power to them.

But there are a lot of pros and cons to weigh out. So it's a big decision.

My mom's best friend has 7 kids, and they all are well taken care of and haven't had to compete for parental attention. =3 I've visited them a few times, and they are really nice people.

As for the homeschooling thing, well, I'm homeschooled. The only reason people might think I'm under educated is because I am CONSTANTLY slacking off/blowing off my homework. > 3> Not being in a class room full of other kids schooled by one teacher, but in stead having ones parents teach you makes sure that one can get any 'special schooling' for weak points that wouldn't be as easy other wise. Plus there is the bonus that we actually spend more time as a family because we're home all the time.

I say? If one is both mentally and physically able to care for a large family, has a stable enough job, and parents who know how to pay attention and care for that many children, it's fine to have a large family. =3 Like Sphynxee said, though, there are a lot of pros and cons to figure out, so it's a big decision and not one that should be taken lightly.

I still think there is a vast difference between 7 and 18 children. It's just plain selfish to me. At that point I think they're past the "Oh God has blessed us with children" point, and are moving onto the "I dont want to keep it in my pants, I like the media attention helping with the bills" direction. :(

Not to mention the fact that there are countless children in this world that dont have homes. If they have so much love to share, why not adopt a few?

Mmmm... Big families are all fine and good, but when it gets up past ten... I don't always know how I feel about that. It just seems like it would be a hard life for the kids, you know? Most people I know want to be good at at least ONE thing that their siblings can't do, imagine being in a family that large and trying to find something that you shine at as a way to impress your parents, when you have 10+ siblings to compete with? I know that I have a tough enough time trying to get my parents' attention, and I only have two siblings. And imagine trying to catch your parents' eye when they have to work so hard to make ends meet for such a big family, 'cause it wouldn't be cheap. I mean... I think it's okay to have a really big family. It's just a hard life, sometimes, and maybe kind of unfair to the kids. You know what I'm saying? It's just something you REALLY need to think about and consider. When I grow up, I plan to adopt 1-5 kids, depending on what kind of lifestyle I end up having, so I obviously cannot see myself with a big family- nor can I see myself having my OWN kids.

I think homeschooling is perfectly alright! ...When people are homeschooled because their parents are INSANELY religious, that's not my favorite thing, but if it's what floats their boat. Regular homeschooling, though, I think is fantabulous. People who are homsechooled, like Lathrine said, get the extra help understanding stuff, which is a huge help, and perobably helps you retain more information. Whereas, if you look in a highschool, how many students are floundering through and trying to grasp concepts they just don't get? (AKA- Me in any math, and any science that isn't biology.) Teachers just don't have the time to individulaly help every student who doesn't understand the material. School-school has it's pros, though, in that you can learn a wider variety of things from people who were specifically taught to understand a few sepecific subjects on a very in-depth level, and it gives you more opportunity to deal with real-life situations and to prepare for you future. I personally prefer school-school over homeschool, but I've been doing it my whole life. And I can most definitely see why homeschool might be a better option.

I think haveing a large family is just fine. I mean i have one myself haha. :D

i dont think its wrong to have so many kids as long as you know your ready for it. it could be overwhelming but some parents can handle it. I would expect it to be quite difficult for them to give attention to each child but that would be one reason to teach them patience and find a fun and entertaining way to keep them busy so they wont bug you as much. I

some woman i know has 14 kids O.o

i don't think there's anything really wrong with large families, although i think the parents need to be very down to earth, and able to manage all of their children fairly. At the point they can no longer do that, i think they've had all the children they should have.
The largest family i know of, is that of one of my friends. She is one of 10 children. She doesn't seem any worse for it, so i think it can be done successfully.

I think I have a big family.
2 adults and 4 kids.
But that's small compared to the other familes. .__.'
Some of my friends have like, 8/9 kids in their families! DX;

If they can handle taking care of the kids, helping them with homework, feeding them, cleaning them, taking care of their health, then it's alright with me. I think it takes a lot of hard work to keep up with such a large family. o_o; Kudos for them! 8]

Well.. some kids might get upset that they're not getting attention, but sooner or later, they've got to learn that little kids [newborns - toddlers] need more attention, since they're so young. And when they're like 18, they'll prolly want to get out of the family since it's so huge. XD I don't know, some of them might grow into those family people, and be super caring and not worrying about getting lots of attention.

Oooh, homeschooling. I've never been homeschooled, but I guess that it would bring the family together and they'd learn more stuff? :] Maybe they'd miss out on what their friends think and do at school, cause if the whole family has the same views and ideas, it would be kinda, eh, non creative? xP I don't really know much about homeschooling, so'yeh. :o

Well, you know, if some parents can handle lots of kids, financially and mentally, since I bet it's a lot of stress, then it's alright. But if you're having lots of kids just 'cause you want money from the government or lots of baby showers just to get gifts.. then that's a little selfish, aye? It's like the kids are there for money, and not to show that it's the creation of your love with your loved one. o_o;;

Let me start by saying to answer your poll I must answer twice! I have 5 kids (sibling wise) in my family... 3 brothers and 1 sister and ME.... Then in MY family there are 2 kids... My two boys and I do plan to have at least one more and even possibly adopt!!!

Do you think this is right?

I think it is a person's choice to have kids I think it is WRONG to have others telling you when you can and can't and how many!!! That is a kids (and Teens) biggest complaint "they always tell me what to do" why should be tell other adults how to live? Honestly as long as the children are loved and supported that is ALL that matters... There are plenty of people who CHOOSE not to have kids...

Do you think the kids have a quality life when they're competing for parental attention?

I think this depends on the parents themselves... My mom is a single mom and we haven't seen our dad in nearly 10 years... She took time to spend with each of us individually and even also took time to make family dinners and everything else! If she can do it ALONE with 5 of us I am sure 2 parents can work it out to do it with 18!!! But I also know there are parents out there who could careless!

Many of these families are home schooled, how will that affect them?

I think that this could be a good... and bad experience... My ex was 1 of 8 kids his mother "homeschooled" all of them! When he requested to go to high school he was not capable of doing that level of work.. She hardly ever did work with the kids so I think it was her fault! But at the same time if the mother and or father are active in teaching their children the children can benefit! And older children can help younger children in their studies bringing the family closer together... Another friend of mine was home schooled with her brothers and sister (I believe there were 6 of them) and she was advanced beyond what her high school offered in everything except foreign language (which is WHY she attended a public high school in the first place)

Does it make a difference when big families are due to artificial insemination or other drugs versus families that don't believe in contraception?

I honestly don't think this matters at all... To each their own!!! Just don't expect me to follow your ways and I won't expect you to follow mine ^.^

I actually want a big family but I am still struggling with a disorder from the birth of my second... It has made me re-think wanting 10 kids and now I would like 3-5 instead... And I am more seriously looking into adoption then before since I am fearful of the problems that pregnancy, labor and delivery have put on my body!

I'm an only child and my parents are divorced and both work.

So basically I live at school to eat up time I'd otherwise spend at my house. I catch my bus at 7:15 and my bus home isn't until 5:15 because I have practice. So I'm gone for 10 hours of the day.

Honestly, I think if you're going to have kids, you should have more than one if your going to be a kind of uninvolved parent, just from the experience of an only child. I mean, no one can force you, but I don't know how to handle people because I didn't have to. I went to school, went home. I wasn't really socialized. But if you're going to make sure your only child has friends, then that's okay.

If you want a lot of kids, I think you should adopt. I mean, I'm pretty much for adoption no matter what, because there are so many homeless children, but seriously, why bring 10 lives into the world when there are many times that without a family?

I won't have kids. They annoy me.

Originally Posted by gothic emo kitty

some woman i know has 14 kids O.o

My family has 13 kids plus a me my parents are sperated though and both remarried but to many that seems alot still
lol it all depends on perspective
my friend andrews family has 16 kids though 5 are adopted the rest are true blood related lol so i dunno big families is kinda what i know best
i could never handle having it be just me

Originally Posted by ElectricEclipse

My family has 13 kids plus a me my parents are sperated though and both remarried but to many that seems alot still
lol it all depends on perspective
my friend andrews family has 16 kids though 5 are adopted the rest are true blood related lol so i dunno big families is kinda what i know best
i could never handle having it be just me

Wow! and I thought my family is big! My mom is getting a little old for kids, so I guess we're stuck at 8.

There are eight kids in my family. We don't all live together. Three of us live with our mother, than my youngest brother and sister live with their mother, and the other three live with my father and his wife.

See, my family of three hardly ever see my father. Because we live far away. I don't think it's wrong to have tons of children, just as long as you can support them adequately (which my father most definitly can). I don't think it as being selfish or anything like that. Sure my dad has to divide his attention 8 ways, but I'm okay with that. because it's always been that way, i've never known anything different. I know he loves us all equally.

see i agree fully but i do think its selfish for people who can't afford to raise their children to have any to begin with, when adoption is a better means, and it gives homes to children that otherwise would have no where to go, i aldo think its selfish for people to give up their children just because they don't want them though, i don't know i guess my up bringing in a big family has taught me one thing easily
even if money is sometimes tight love is always a plenty and though it may not always be the best thing to live off of, sometimes its all thats required for happiness

My family isn't big its just me, my brother and my parents. My mom's family was pretty big though because she has like seven siblings. I have around eight cousins on my mom's side.

As for how I feel about big families, I think that if the people can deal with that many kids its fine. If you're having trouble raising 1-3 kids then you shouldn't have anymore. It would only get worse for them if more kids are brought into the family.

precisely the arguement of many
unless you can manage it don't do it
but if you can
then all the power to you

Well in some countries they need to have a lot of kids to help support their family.
My friend has like 8 people in her family including her,I think, and she said her parents have a lot of kids is to help them do the chores around the house, when their busy at the garden working.

First off...I know a family that had three of their own kids and then adopted four or five other kids as well. It was more of a choice, they had the money, they wanted to help out other kids who didn't have homes and they wanted to share their love and give more opportunities to these kids.

I don't see the appeal of having such a large family...I think I'd go crazy. But it's their choice and if they can care for their children and support them..then good for them.

Homeschooling...in actuality homeschooled kids are much better off then publicly schooled kids. They get more personal attention, and a lot of times they get a say in what they want to study instead of being made to do or read certain things. It gives them more freedom and a much more enthusiastic appetite for learning.

As for the children who are older and help govern the younger ones, this is just preparing them for jobs as well as when they will have families of their own. Its not a bad thing at all. It teaches them responsibility as well as how to help others. From what I've experienced when you have a large household and everyone has their job it's going to run a lot more smoothly. Take for example...if a mother let her kids do whatever the heck they wanted and didn't ask them or require them to help out with things around the house they're going to be the college kids that have no clue how to take care of themselves. They'll be completely hapless and have to call home every other day for assistance. That's just wrong.

Also...I am from a bigger family than most. I grew up with 4 siblings, as well as a set of grandparents in the home. I was also homsechooled.

With the population rates we have today I think it's wrong since eventually there will be no more room on earth or we'll end up destroying earth due to these large families, If you want more than 2 kids I think you should adopt, you only need two kids to replace you, adding more will likely end up destroying the planet, already humans have caused enough harm.

I want two kids at max. To be honest, I would prefer a single child, but my boyfriend is very much inclined on a minimum of at the very least two, with a preference for more.

I just don't know how much I could handle before my kids would have to start competing for attention and/or resources. And shockingly, I do want to have a life outside of parenting.