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This is pretty astounding for me to find this topic.

I'm a 17-year-old girl, and I feel no sexual attraction to anyone, male, female, plant, animal, myself... no one.
Seeing the other girls at my school throw themselves at boys makes me feel like there's something wrong with me because I don't thrive on another's attention.
I've had one REAL boyfriend, and all we ever kid was peck lips and cuddle (once). I felt nice when I was with him, but not like I sexually drawn to him, and that's why I think our relationship failed.
I've hit puberty, and I am fully developed (trust me D: ), and I feel no physical or mental attraction to anyone. I am returned with no interest. People usually assume I'm a lesbian because I don't thrive on male attention, or go out of my way to make anyone interested in me.

I feel that someone will fall in love with my personality, not my looks or my sexuality. So, I don't know what I would classify as. :\
It's just nice to know that there are other people like me out there.
I was starting to feel very alone.

I don't know anyone myself that is openly Asexual but, then I didn't know anyone that was openly gay or lesbian until I was about 20 either. I knew some that were in the 'closet' by the time I was 15 but, no one that was out in the open about it.

It shows a great deal of strength of character to be open about something most will not understand. Very impressive by all here that have been open about being Asexual. :)

Be true to yourself :D

god forgive me for saying this, but while there may not be anything "wrong" with her, there is something that is missing. and ya know, i take offense to people using the term A-sexual incorrectly. it refers to organisms that reproduce by themselves, they dont require a partner. last time i checked, humans cant do that.

I think there is another term for it - it's not 'asexualism'

Oh and I just read deweyduquesne's post. They're right - asexulism refers to any organism that can reproduce by themselves without a partner. Like sea sponges and their ability to 'bud' xD

As for not having the need to be with anyone, maybe one day you'll find someone. You're still young and there's over a billion people on this earth. odds are, you'll want to be with at least one of them.

And even if you don't find that person, being in a relationship isn't important. Just be yourself and live life the way you see fit.

I take offense when people use the word "bat" incorrectly. It's a stick used to hit balls. Last time I checked, a stick that hits balls is not a nocturnal, flying mammal.

See how silly you sound?

Let me preface my comments on the matter by clarifying that both I and one of my sisters are asexual, another sibling is transgender, and another two are bi. The last one is just anti-social, so no telling.

Between those influences and others, I ask you to consider the validity of my post appropriately.

As soon as I saw this thread, I knew it would be a muddled mess of arguments, accusations, misinformation, and close-mindedness.

The fact is, that's simply how it always goes:
Asexuality is the most prejudiced against and misunderstood sexual group out there-
Now, you'll argue that point, and rightfully so.
However, transgender and homosexuality, while approached with more hostility, also has support and community. In fact, people typically don't argue against what those groups feel, they argue against the 'rightness' of it.

Asexuals, on the other hand, have no real support, based mostly off their lack of numbers (though they are greater than commonly thought). Additionally, people argue against their very existence, decrying them as late bloomers, or arguing titular semantics.

Additionally, I have seen and gone through countless instances of homosexual and bisexuals holding stigmas against asexuals. Whereas asexuals tend to be open about homosexuality (after all, to them, barring psudeoreligious demands and other elements affecting their judgement, homosexuality really isn't any different than heterosexuality) homosexuals however don't necessarily share their openness to asexuals.

This is also standard for humans, as the history of racism, sexism, and ageism has shown us through the years through their developments never being applied to future such events.

Now, to the definitions:

First off, asexuality does appropriately apply to sexual procreation foremost.
However: a (without) sexuality. By root definition, linguistic derivation (anti-sexual -> a-sexual -> asexual), and by the regular development of language asexuality has become a valid and appropriate term.

Second, asexuality has at least five main developmental points:
1: The asexual person has determined themselves to be asexual due to lack of hormonal development- since primary sexual hormonal influences may not activate in a person (primarily in females) until their first real sexual stimulation, as well as the occasional genetic glitch, this is a valid, albeit overly appreciated reason.

2: The asexual person has determined themselves to be asexual due to over-development of the superego- the person genuinely does not have sexual interests, finding personality and higher level elements far more appealing. This could arguably be considered an advancement on human nature, since it is a growth of higher level functioning and basis. However, a truly existential viewpoint is required to counter the negative element posed by the lack of procreation.

3: The asexual person has determined themselves to be asexual due to emotional overload- by rape, bad relationships, or other events, the person has emotionally distanced themselves from sex, causing them to not react to sexual stimuli as per the norm. This would be an instance of mind over matter- the person genuinely is asexual, and are not merely hiding their reactions.

4: The person is posing at being asexual due to some outlying (societal) pressure upon them- this isn't exactly a major problem with such a 'closeted' thing as asexuality, but I know of a publicized event in which this did happen.

5: The person is asexual due to inability to have physical contact, and the emotional (fear) afflictions that causes on their responses, thus stunting their desires. This is common among people suffering the worst of afflictions- burns, cancer, and so forth.
It can also be due to a phobia of germs, of people, of contact, and other causes.



Since obviously there isn't a definitional or existence issue with asexuality- excepting those same ones that could be applied to anything through matters of blind approach- we will move on to the final note:

Asexuality may be the rarest of sexualities at this point and time, but due to societal pressures a great number of the asexuals out there either hide their sexuality, or merely don't promote it so as to forestall the stresses doing so would cause.

That is to say, there are more of us out there than you'd suspect, so for the asexuals reading this, don't feel like the odd one out.

Now, as with all sexual orientations, it is easy to delude yourself into being one you aren't based off of not understanding the influences upon your current views. The key is always to keep an open mind.


As a final addendum, I'd like to clarify the note on Pansexuality:
Pansexual is also known as Omnisexual- or, 'all'sexual. Pansexuality involves complete openness about sexuality, by approaching the matters of sex based off non-sexual considerations: Be they aesthetic, characteristic, or otherwise.

They are, however, still sexual considerations, and as such, distinctly different from those of Asexuality.

listen, i'm sorry if I offended you. And I am willing to say that my viewpoint may very well be wrong and ignorant. For that, I am truly sorry. But I still hold my view that to be asexual will be to have the ability to procreate without the need of an opposing sex. I do not believe it should be used to describe people because we DO need the opposing sex to procreate. BUT, that does not mean that i wouldn't support you or anything you do(I do not know you so I can't say if I wouldn't support anything you do). Forgive me if my view hurt you, for that's not my intent. I was angry when I wrote it and I am angry at my self presently for having wrote it.

that, i am more ready to accept. not that my opinion actually matters or anything lol

@IkuAki: That's cool. Do you know if there is such a thing as demiromantic?

I don't know if anyone has said this but humans can't be asexual. not biologically at least. :lol:
I don't think there's a term for you except maybe late-bloomer?

I call it asexual. Mine is the product of anti depressants, but I can't even muster a mild attraction to anyone. I know that I am attracted to guys, or at least I was, but now I can't do much more than think "that guy would be my type". I still appreciate beauty in both males and females, but it's on a different level. I think as long as you're happy with things that way, then there is no problem with it.

I used to be the same way.. Up until I was 16. I wasn't attracted to anybody. I didn't have my first kiss till I was 18.... I only dated once, but that was because she was my best friend. She was lots of fun to hang out with and talk to, but I wasn't attracted to her at all. And now I'm totally opposite of that..
So, really, there isn't anything wrong at all with not being attracted to males or females. What really matters is that you are happy with how you are.

Asexual does not mean that you are in love with yourself. It means that you are not sexually attracted to anyone of any gender. You still have emotion and care about people but you are not sexually attracted to them. I'm pansexual but I know a person who is asexual

@chefiris: I have to agree. Going by the literal meaning "asexual" means without sexual means. If you were in love with yourself you'd be autosexual and a narcissist. However, I think the original poster felt that since asexual lifeforms reproduce on their own, that the term didn't quite fit.

Well Asexual in the genetic reproduction sense means they can reproduction their own. But! Asexual the sexuality just means you lack the ability to be sexually attracted to anyone.

True, but asexual the sexuality is pretty much as made up as "multisexual". So I can understand the confusion.

Made up? What do you mean? like Not documented or... What is multisexual, I've heard of omnisexual and pansexual.

Wow. Thank you for posting this. I had heard someone recently talking about how they identify as both genderless and asesual. I wasn't really sure what to think about it because it was just a different perspective than I normally feel. Zee's story also has a happy ... I'm not sure "ending" is the right word here. But Zee is very happly with zee's girlfriend. They fell in love with eachothers minds and imperfections. Hope all goes well for you!

@Che: As in, not an accepted psychological term. Homosexual, heterosexual, an bisexual are all terms used to describe human sexuality in scientific communities. The others are terms which have become accepted (though not well defined) in the communities in which they are found, but are not accepted scientific terms. (Though they may be in the future)

Oh Ok I understand that

Haha, sorry. I'm just a total nerd. And I love psychology. As a hobby, anyway. My sister is going into psych as a career.