Situation:
My ex boyfriend asked me to do his homework for him because he's behind. I agreed, sadly, now I have five chapters of homework sitting infront of my face. It's all due tomorrow of course.
This man broke my heart. He was a good man, but he wanted another. Parts of me still love him, but other parts are seething with rage.

Question:
Should I fail him, or give him an A?
What would you do in a similar situation?
Does it make one power hungry?
I know it'll make me feel better, but I don't know if it's too mean.

D: Why in the world did you agree?

Did you even know the amount of work you'd have to do? @[email protected]

......ironically this sounds very similar to something that happened to me. Except the guy wasn't my boyfriend. He was one of my friend's boyfriends. And he hadn't recently been treating her very well because his mom didn't like her and he was stuck between his mom paying for his college and his girlfriend... and so he'd distanced himself emotionally from both of them. And when he discovered he was going to fail his class because he'd missed so much...

...his girlfriend, that is, my friend, and I did his five chapters of homework for him. Each assignment was three or four pages long with questions that required paragraph answers. It was a US History type class. =/ It's not like I needed a refresher in black history and Rowd vs. Wade and stuff. >_<

I was faster at typing than his gf... and for us to turn it in as 'his' it had to be typed. So... off I went... reading her and his crappy handwriting... and doing half the answers myself. She attempted to do most of the question answering herself but I caught up in typing faster than she could answer on another assignment.

I didn't get thanked NEARLY enough. I didn't get much sleep. I felt good about myself and had hopes for him... and he did pass... just barely. But you know what? With the way he was treating his gf I should have just said no. Morally? I maybe should have said no because its wrong to cheat.

...but because I was his friend I helped him anyway. (But like I said, I still don't think I was thanked nearly enough, even though he felt like he owed me a lot and I got a few small things out of it.) ...if you DO do it, you can probably hang it over his head for several months. If you don't, just as well. Serves him right for hurting you.

Why should you do anybody else's homework at all? D: ;; To me, it seems crazy to want to help someone get better in life when all the while you are leading your life on a downhill slope. I think you should only attend to your own needs instead of helping him with what he could have done by himself in an honest way. That homework was given for him to do and not yourself.
It's idiotic that he thinks he can ask you to do something after the way he treated you. Don't help him or let him get used to you being able to help him. If he does get used to this, this problem will occur more and more often.
Anyway.
How is his failing going to affect you later on in life? Wouldn't helping him be like cheating, and it would be unfair if you grow up knowing that he would become successful because he had your help, and you would be too stressed out to acheive your goals.
You should think about this in this perspective.
It doesn't hurt to say No once in a while. He'll probably
a. Go and do it himself like he should have done earlier.
b. Should learn to manage his Time better.
c. Go off and ask for someone else's help and it'll be they're problem, not yours.
d. Ask the teacher for more time, if he has a decent excuse for being behind.

I don't really know the situation too, well, but I think you should just go with your own needs. v.v

:UU

Let him fail.

Unfortunatly, I did an okay job on it.
103.3%
99.39%
98.3%
111.8%
98.39%
95.4%

Now, I have two more chapters to do, and I'm not feeling very kind.
He hasn't even thanked me at all.
I know he will never become a success, and he will never find someone as great as myself.
Maybe I feel sorry for him?
Maybe I don't.
I should tell him I'm never doing this again, I haven't gotten so much as a text of thanks. A text, that's all I ask. Is it too much?
I hate myself now.

I gave him a 85.6% for his last assignment.
I've never taken Astromony before, but I think I would do okay in it.

He can go to anime/Magic the Gathering clubs twice a week for three hours each and still not do his homework. Give me a break.
I'm failing these next two chapters.
Is it right to ask an ex girlfriend to do your homework? Well, I know it's not smart. :]

I'd let him fail.
It's his own fault he's behind.

Would you ask him to do it for you? Think if the situation was switched around.

You'd at least have thanked him I hope.

Fail him, if can't do at least that!

FAIL HIM!! D:<

Would a guy feel differently?
Unfortunatly my genes haven't failed anything since forth grade.

@Fauxreal- I would fail if I let him do my homework.

I'm with the idea of failing him. He's basically just using you cause of your kindness. I mean I know this just me, but I really hate when people use others kindness for their own gain (I myself at times have a hard time telling friends no).

I mean if he'd at least say thanks, show gratitude or something maybe it wouldn't be so bad.
I'm not one to tell anyone that being mean is the way to go, but sometimes you just have to be less you get walked all over.

One more for failing him.

I think it's easy for people who aren't involved to say "Let him fail!" or "OMG HOW COULD YOU DO THAT??" It's hard to do it, but the fact that you posted this question means you know there's a lot wrong with this situation. He's your ex boyfriend, so at one point you had loving feelings towards him (maybe you still do)...but you need to realize that what he's doing to you now is using you. He's not appreciating you or doing nice things or even being friendly. Come on, would you do this to any of your female friends? No and you would be angry if someone else did this to you. This is a guy who knows that you are too nice and takes advantage of that fact to get out of doing things. I think it's important that you see what's going on and do something to pull yourself out of this situation. Think about it this way, he's so dependent that he's not taking care of himself or being responsible for himself. Right now, you are not his girlfriend or his friend....you are his mom. That's right. And it hurts. Especially when you trusted this person and were with them once, but you need to do this for yourself or you'll be stuck in this cycle. I wish you the best!~ I know it's hard, but if you wanna talk more, feel free to message me!

Also, I don't think you should fail him, I think you should give back the hw.


"He hasn't even thanked me at all."

Like I said in my other post, he wasn't asking you because he was being friendly. He's just using you. Sorry, sweetie

"I know he will never become a success, and he will never find someone as great as myself."

He especially won't turn his life around when someone as nice as you is doing all his work. People aren't thankful to someone who is always available for them to use. You seem really great, so why are you helping him? Remember, he has the choice to ask you and to say thanks, but you also have the choice to walk away.

Also, I don't think you should fail him, I think you should give back the hw.


EDIT: SO SORRY! I forgot you can't double post here, but I can't find the delete button!!

Darkwingedfaerie puts it best, at least a lot better then I could have. Got a bit anger cause really don't like when other use others, especially nice people.

I'm with Darkwingedfaerie on this.

I don't know what's wrong with me.
I've never been nice to anyone. Seriously, when we were dating, I'd make fun of his penis.
I deserve some sort of compensation, and having him fail wouldn't make me feel better.
I want to draw blood. I'm really not the ugly ex girlfriend. I at least try to stay civil to the people I've been with.

@darkwingedfaerie- I agree with you, but the mom thing did hurt. However, I'm the middle child which would make me the mother of pretty much everything. Thank you so much.

@Trir- I never though of it as "walking all over" me.
That puts it in a completely different light or at least a very negative view.

I would do neither. I would call him and tell him that you just don't feel right doing someone else's homework for them. It's his life, and he shouldn't be relying on you to live it, even if he wasn't your ex boyfriend.

Originally Posted by Scarling Zombie

I don't know what's wrong with me.
I've never been nice to anyone. Seriously, when we were dating, I'd make fun of his penis.
I deserve some sort of compensation, and having him fail wouldn't make me feel better.
I want to draw blood. I'm really not the ugly ex girlfriend. I at least try to stay civil to the people I've been with.

@darkwingedfaerie- I agree with you, but the mom thing did hurt. However, I'm the middle child which would make me the mother of pretty much everything. Thank you so much.

@Trir- I never though of it as "walking all over" me.
That puts it in a completely different light or at least a very negative view.

Yeah, I think I was probably a little harsh. Sorry. :( I think it's because I can relate sooo much to your story. People have taken advantage of me my whole life because I'm too nice and I hate that it happens to other people. I'm a middle child, too, with LOADS of family problems and bad ex-bfs all over the place. I'm not done getting myself out of that mess, but I am a lot better than when I used to be. :-/

I would not have agreed to do his homework in the first place. But as you already agreed to I think you should full fill your promise and then NOT DO IT AGAIN. When he fails it will be his own fault. Or he can have his new girl friend do it. Which ever he prefers, just as long as it is not taking advantage of you.

Originally Posted by darkwingedfaerie

Yeah, I think I was probably a little harsh. Sorry. :( I think it's because I can relate sooo much to your story. People have taken advantage of me my whole life because I'm too nice and I hate that it happens to other people. I'm a middle child, too, with LOADS of family problems and bad ex-bfs all over the place. I'm not done getting myself out of that mess, but I am a lot better than when I used to be. :-/

I wish you luck, and if you need an ear, I have two.
You can just PM me.

@aimeeko- Yes ma'am. Actually, his next girlfriend would have to be dumber than me. Har har.