Homophobic Gays
 

I went to a school where we had a lot more Gay students than most highschools.

However no guys dated within the school because they all HATED eachother,

so it was a running joke that the Gays at my Highschool were homophobic towards one another, so we called them the 'Homophobic Gays', except instead of 'Gays' we used another three letter word that Began with F that I'm fairly sure I could get in trouble for using, thus my choice to change the word to 'gay'.

Most gay students actually attended my highschool because of how there was little to no bullying there, maybe they could have a chance at being accepted and find a nice guy/girl right?

Wrong XD

They all hated eachother because of clashing personalities, so I thought it was funny

What are your thoughts?
Do you go to a school with the same or a simmilar situation?

Edit; since it seems no one posting is actually reading this whole post, I'll dumb down what I meant

'They're not actually homophobic, this is an ironic exaggeration used because not many of the gay students get along very well. You would think that with a less than common sexuality they would at least be able to tolerate one another thanks to common ground.'

Moved your thread to the correct forum for it. :) "Community Discussion" is for discussions revolving around the Menewsha community. :)

That sounds less like homophobia and more like typical teen drama + typical gay drama, and I found it hard to believe that no gay relationships took place. In my experience, that's usually the source of the anger.

Also,
You say there was little to no bullying, but you tossed around 'fag' like it was an acceptable word?

No, I've never heard of a school having such a high homosexual population. The average is at least 10%, exactly how much higher are you talking about?

I am gay, and I certainly do not hate 'gay people' anymore than 'straight people'. I don't like some individuals in each group, but judging a whole group of people based on one predetermined aspect is something I try to avoid.

Side note: When I clicked on this, I thought it would be about ex-gays, who are, I think, more like Homophobic Gays.

I'll go ahead and agree with RainbowRhino here. Not all gay people have the same personality. Sounds more like high school drama than gay bashing. Every high school has drama, and they didn't get along because of their personalities, not because they hated someone else for their sexuality even though it's the same.

I live in a small community, and as far as I know, I am the only open homosexual. I'm sure there are more. My stepbrother very heavily leans toward other males, but he is only open about it at home. So I can't say.

Just because you're gay doesn't mean you're going to automatically get along with every other gay person out there. That's like saying if you're interested in the opposite sex that you'll automatically get along with everyone of the opposite sex. I really dislike that way of thinking mainly because I have had girls not be friends with me when they found out that I date girls because they thought I'd hit on them. My reply to that is "Don't flatter yourself".

I got so much crap for dating girls through high school. My attitude about it was always the "let them think what they want to" type of thinking. I never really cared what people thought of me. I went to a small school and everyone knew everyone else's business. From what I understand by talking to kids in the same high school, being gay is more accepted now than it was back when I was in high school.

As for hating other pansexual/gay people, yes, I have met gay/bi/pansexual/etc people that I do not care to be around. I have also met straight people that I do not care to be around either. To me, gender, sexuality, race, etc do not matter to me and it's not something that I really give a second thought to.

I forgot to add that the title of the thread reminds me of a girl I used to be really close with. She claimed she loved me but was afraid of other people calling her a lesbian so she randomly started dating this ass and started making fun of me for "liking rainbows".

It is acceptable here, if we use the word casually it has less of a hurtful feel to it when someone else uses it, so we don't take it as seriously. Words only have power if we treat it like it has power.

Besides, the word 'Fag' has evolved so much by the time our kids are using it, it will have nothing to do with gays anyway.

It's still a hurtful word, no matter how you try to slice it. Less hurtful, you say, but still hurtful. If I were to casually toss around the word "nigger" it would certainly still be hurtful, even if I'm just joking about it. How do you know it doesn't truly bother them?

And maybe it will, maybe it won't. A bitch is a female dog, yet it's still used in a derogatory sense. Besides, kids pick up on their parents mannerisms. If a parent is calling someone a fag, their child will pick up on it.

A fag just isn't a cigarette anymore.

It's all in the context in which the word is used. My friends and I aren't so sensitive that we take offense to everything.

It doesn't bother me at all when people call me a fag, because again, I know it's just a word.

people use 'bitch' casually as well, especially among friends, you're far less likley to be hurt by the word now than you were 5 or 10 years ago.

I know people that are offended by the word "fag" but then I also know some gay people that use the word casually as well. It all depends on the person whether or not it's offensive and how offensive the word is. To me, it's only offensive if you take offense to it.

You're still falling into it, though. Even if it's in jest, you're using the word in a derogatory sense, and in a way making it "okay" to say it; when it's not.

For example, a bully calls someone a fag. Obviously he means that in a mean sense, and it hurts the other person's feelings.
My friend calls me a fag in a joke way, because I tripped and he thought it was funny. He's still using it in a derogatory sense, which doesn't make sense anyway because that isn't the word's intention. I am not a cigarette for tripping.

Call someone a bitch, they're not a female dog. Say this television show is gay, it's not a homosexual. It just doesn't make sense.

Well, think about it: some ladies and gents of the heterosexual persuasion never date during high school too, and their dating pool is much bigger. I was nearly one of those.

And yikes at the "f" word. I wouldn't hang around in the circles that throw that around. Words carry a lot of weight, even now. I can understand the joking, my gay friends even throw around the word. That doesn't excuse anything. Because one group may find it funny and harmless, and another...might jump off a bridge to their death. Unfortunately trying to make it harmless by laughing at the silly words doesn't help when real people die from them. Just sayin.'

So okay, then don't use the word in that context, I'm not forcing you

but I and those around me aren't so over-sensitive, we don't give people power by letting them hurt our feelings with words, I'm going to continue to use the word how I please because I know if someone doesn't like it, they will tell me.

When I was at school, I used to find that most of the guys who were out were really over the top about being gay. Ultra flamboyant (or as they liked to call it "Fabulous"), ultra loud and in your face. It made me feel deeply embarrassed to swing the same way they did.
It was only after I'd finished school that I realised that it was (in most cases) a huge front they'd put on to get them through it all.
It made me confused as hell at the time, as I was thinking that there was something wrong with me for not being just like them.
I figured that all gay guys were just obsessed with appearance and being camper than a field of tents.

I didn't realise for a long time that there were plenty of gay guys who had accepted themselves and were more conservative and calm.
I guess the loud ones just made the other ones seem invisible.

For me, the gay guys in my school who were loud and obnoxious were drama kids and their personalities had NOTHING to do with their sexuality XD

but I understand how you feel, I mean, other Lesbians tend to embarass me when they go too far.

For example, in Highschool I knew two girls who were dating, who would almost maul eachother (making out and touching in a very over-the-top kinda way) in the cafeteria. We were a K-12 school, there were little kids around!

If a strait couple did that, they were told off and would stop, but when these girls got told off, they automatically assumed the teachers telling them to sit in their own chairs were homophobic.

So it was really embarassing because, even if people deny it, other people DO associate Lesbians with one another.

I'm not over-sensitive. I just try to make sense. Calling someone a cigarette doesn't make sense. And you don't know that. Not everyone expresses their feelings in the same way. But it's quite obvious you'll continue using a derogatory word even though it doesn't make sense/will harm others. So go on ahead.

You use it, and your friends use it, you just said that before, and you don't feel bad about it, and didn't at the time, if you did or had, you would have told your friend off, or mentioned you had done so when you posted about it.

So don't talk down on other people just because you disagree with something they do.

What I said before was an example. I don't use it, and my friends don't use it either. I'm sorry you misinterpreted what I said. I tell everyone who does use it, not to use it, because it doesn't make sense and is degrading.

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A hypothetical example, I mean. Made up situation.

You can stop flame-baiting anytime by the way, this isn't a debate thread. If you hate the wordx so much, then leave the thread. No one else is complaining about how I used the word. Why? Because they are mature enough to ignore it if they don't like it.

Also, how can something be degrading if it doesn't make sense? If it doesn't make sence, you shouldn't care, because it doesn't apply to you.

I could use 'shoe' in the same context as 'fag', does that mean no one should use the word 'shoe'? Does it offend people if I call them 'shoe'? No, because it doesn't make sense.
So If 'Fag' doesn't make sense to you, why can I not use it?

Fag | Define Fag at Dictionary.com

Look at all the non-derogitory definitions of the term 'fag', you say I shouldn't use the word because ONE of them is a derogatory term for homosexual, because that definition is used so commonly today.

Now, please leave my thread, the thread you made so uncomfortable with your negative energy when I intended it to be a light hearted discussion. Like I said before, if you're SO offended by the word, you can leave.

I go to a college where EVERYONE pretty much hates everyone else... 8)

I would imagine that would help with studies, less social distractions XD

I'm not familiar with the term flame-baiting. I'm not flaming you, you're not flaming me, so I don't understand where that's even coming from. You are using the word in a derogatory manner, which is what I mean that doesn't make sense. Why would you use that word, meaning it to be derogatory? If you used shoe in it's correct sense, I would not mind. If you used fag in a correct sense, I wouldn't mind either.

I wasn't negative, I was just pointing up something and putting it up for discussion. This is General Discussion, is it not? Unless I am misunderstanding the point of this forum. But if you so wish for me to leave, I shall. It's not worth attempting a civil discussion with you, anyway.

That right there, that i bolded, is really illustrating how snobby you seem, which is the reason I don't want you posting in my thread.

and fag is a slang term meaning homosexual, so using it to mean homosexual IS using it in a correct sence. There is more than one definition for it, and wether or not it is derogitory depends on the context it is used. I was not using it in a derogitory manner, you just took it that way, which I don't get, because I wasn't even talking about you.

Sorry to butt in here, but this is an issue that really bothers me. I am offended everytime someones uses the word fag, whether they are speaking to me or not.

Starling.Blackwood: You were using it in a derogatory manner, because it's a derogatory word. From your own link:

It's not a positive word. It cannot be a positive word. It's an insulting and offensive word. It has no relevant meaning that is not insulting or offensive. Unless you are a British person and you are talking about cigarettes, it's completely inappropriate. If you're chatting with your friends, speak however you wish. On the internet, if someone tells you a word is offensive, apologize and stop using it.

Just was looking over the argument that's sort of developed, or debate call it whatever you'd like. Anywho I decided to quick add my opinion. My English class tosses words like 'fag' and other derogatory words around just in general and my teacher eventually had enough and pretty much said that it doesn't matter what the word is, it depends on how you use it, and like the example you gave, how do you think this use of the word evolved? People just started using it in that context, like the book Frindle by Andrew Clements.

It's the way that you say the word that matters not what the word is, quite frankly I don't necassarily like the use of the word but I'm kind of stuck in the middle of the points that you,P W E E P, and RainbowRhino have made. I say that if your group is fine with it, then just watch a bit more carefully how you use it and make sure everyone is completely fine with it, and try not to use it around people who aren't.

And to awnser the original question, no I haven't really ever been in a setting like that, but most of my friends are bisexual and it is the personality because some of them are kind of loud and obnoxious and some are more so quiet and keep out of things (though that percentage is far smaller).

I knew a guy who was gay. He didn't like the 'flamboyant' types. He wasn't homophobic, he just REALLY disliked that type of persona. Just because somebody is gay doesn't mean they'll like every other homosexual they meet. Same goes for other sexual orientations: just because somebody is a straight female doesn't mean they'll tolerate every other straight female. There are so many people I don't like because of their personalities. I'm sure that's the case with the students who happen to be homosexual. If your personality doesn't mesh, why bother?