Meeting your significant other's parents...
 

So how many others are scared of their significant other's parents.

I'm always nervous when meeting a boyfriend's parents. I'm ALWAYS nervous. Even after meeting them, I wonder if they liked me. I wonder if they were just pretending to be friendly. haha

I've had dinner a few times with my current boyfriend's family (We've been dating for 3 months exactly tomorrow). Anyway, my boyfriendh as to work tonight but I don't have to work. So his parents invited me to dinner with them. So it'll be his parents...his grandmother...possibly his younger sister....and me. He won't be there.

Even though I've been around them a bit I'm still nervous because he won't be there.

How many of you are scared to meet the parents of the person you are dating? Do you get as nervous as I do? Have any horror stories? (My stepdad always threatened to get a shotgun when he met my dates for the first time lol).

I'm always terrified to meet a boyfriend's parents. Oddly enough, most of my boyfriends feel the same way about MINE - though my Mom loves all my boyfriends immediately, Dad always takes a while to warm up. It's good to be an only child and a girl. :sarcasm:

My ex's parents were amazing, and loads of fun - but even after knowing them for almost four years, when he and I began to date, I started walking on eggshells around them all over again. It's a psychological thing... I just want my boyfriend's parents to love me as much as he does!

haha my boyfriends are the same way too. My current boyfriend was terrified to meet my parents XD And my mom likes him but my stepdad told my mom a few weeks ago that, "He was sorry...he tries to like him...but no one is good enough for his little girl." lmao XD I'm sorry dad but I'm not living in a box my whole life XDD I will eventually get married...so he just needs time to warm up to them XDD

haha, I'm still really shy around my boyfriend's mom even though I think she regards me as another daughter almost XD

she's a very nice lady and all, but I'm still scared XD

Most of the time I'm okay with it. I don't get nervous around people. If they don't like me oh well. My exhusband's mom always referred to me as "that damn Michigan girl". She doesn't like me much even to this day because I somehow corrupted her son because I'm not religious. She lives across the country from me.

My other ex's dad hated me for the longest time and I had no idea why until she told me it was because I'm gay. I just kind of avoided him though.

My parents hates Muslims.
My partner's parents aren't particularly fond of their child marrying a non-Muslim/Asian (though the father seems cool about it).

Overall, going to generally avoid the in-laws. Only 1 out of 4 currently know. xD

I hate meeting anyone's parents in general.

I've met my boyfriend's dad before, and his step-mom. :) His dad is pretty cool, he used to be a teacher but now mostly does administrative work. His step-mom I think is unemployed, and she's pretttyyy crazy. lol But very sweet, just...I don't think she's completely there all the time. xD

I'm nervous to meet him mom though...and I'm not sure when that will be...probably not for a long time, but...I do hope it goes well when it happens. I love Andy very much and I'd hate to have problems with his parents, just because I know they are (or at least his dad's opinions) about people are pretty important to him even though he's an adult. I think he admires his dad very much though for having been such a great school teacher, and working as hard as he does.

I was a little scared of my boyfriends mother, but over time she welcomed me more and more
She is very funny now that we are much closer

Well, I have a quite different story then all of you. My boyfriends parents are dead. I met them when I was at James's aunts funeral. James's dad (well step-dad because he hates his bio dad) George died of Alzheimer's complications. Carmel (James's mom) died of heart failure (they had to reconstruct her whole heart and it didn't work). James took care of his parents until they both died.

He talks about his parents fondly, even though he was kicked out at 15 and didn't really connect with his parents until about 5 years or so before they're deaths. I asked about his bio dad and he told me that James almost beat the bastard to death (with good reason though). When Carmel was pregnant with James, his bio dad beat Carmel because she was pregnant again and James was 5 months premature.


My parents really don't like James, but they put up with him because we love each other and James has always picked up the pieces when I self structured. They really don't like him because he's 20 years older then I am, he has had 2 children already (Donovan is my age and is living in the southern part of the province being a DJ, Sheldon passed away 6 hrs after birth because his lungs didn't develop). They also say that he's really a bad influence on me and he's the reason why I've tried killing myself and why I'm still mentally ill.

James really doesn't like my parents either, because they only are civil towards him and he know that they blame him for everything wrong in my life. He tolerates them on holidays and visits, but he doesn't like spending large amounts of time with them.

Then again, my parents have never really been comfortable or accepting of the fact that I'm mentally ill and "different". They want me to date people (only men) who are like them. My parents are substance abusers.

I got a question for you guys. Does any of this have to do with race? Like interracial couples?
Because that was my problem. Him being Lao and me just some random American girl. Anyways, my boyfriend's parents didn't start to warm up to me until two years into our relationship. It was hard, but I'm proud to say I'm as big part of his family as I am in mine.

I remembered the first time I went over to his house. We were playing Mario Kart and we were having fun. Then his mom walked in a just stared at me dead on. It was BEYOND awkward and scary. Then he later told me that she didn't approve of our relationship, so he just told her I was his friend. Yeah, I was "just a friend" for about a year, then she caught on. Turns out she didn't like me simply because I was white. Dad accepted it and just said whatever, but that mom was a tough cookie. It hurt that I wasn't the sweet, innocent asian girl that his parents wanted me to be. I was the smart-mouthed, lazy white whore.

When he moved away to college, I ended up eating dinner and helping his mother out at home a handful of times, so that's when she started warming up to me. I felt like a war hero when he called me up and told me that his mom finally wanted me to come over more often. I hate cooking, but its better than that death stare.

As for my parents, I just kept telling him that he had TONS in common with my father. Then the first time they met, I purposely made him wear a Modest Mouse shirt (one of my dad's favorite bands) and Daddy started liking this kid right away. (:

I had nothing to worry about yesterday. It was a little awkward at first but his parents and grandmother are all really nice and accepted me and talked with me and hung out with me until he was off of work. We both live at home right now...because we're both POOR as all get out (He's 25 and I'm 22)....It's funny though...because he was telling me that he hasn't been allowed to have a girlfriend spend the night in 6 years of living at home (since his ex-fiancee had spent the night)....but his parents let me spend the night even after just 3 months of dating. He was like, "They must REALLY REALLY REALLY like you!!!!" lol <3


@The Real Nikki - never had to deal with parents who didn't approve due to race or religion or whatever, luckily! One of my best friends in Indian (her parents moved from India to America)....and her grandparents had this plan for her that she was to be married to a nice indian boy and have 3 kids by the time she was 25. But she wants to be a doctor and go to medical school and she was just like, "that's NOT happening!" Her parents are accepting of people she dates but I still think her whole family prefers she date indian men.

That mom sounds so difficult!! I always get worried and then the parents end up loving me so I've never had to deal with that before. The guys I've dated always started as friends so my parents liked them as a friend before I dated them. But then my current boyfriend...hahaha...my parents found out about him when I changed my facebook status to be "in a relationship." I had just met him a few weeks before he asked me out officially and so there wasn't any time to bring him over and introduce him to my parents. They had heard me mention him a few times and saw me texting him a lot...but I had just moved in with them after I graduated college and they had moved while I was in college...so I think they just thought I was making a new friend XD My mother likes my boyfriend...my stepdad hasn't been around him enough to like him yet....he's like your man's mom...he's going to take a while to like him XD

@Hamster - Wow, that's crazy! It kind of reminds me of my stepdad...his mother died when he was a child and his father died when he was a teenager. He has no parents. My mother never had the chance to meet them. And my stepdad never had a chance to meet her parents because they both died before they married. My mother was the black sheep of her family and so she never kept in touch with her parents anyway....I only ever met them once in my life.

I'm glad that you two love each other so much and are doign so well! Love had no limits including age differences. If you truly love him and he loves you, then nothing else matters. Your parents sound protective and worried but they can't change anything. I'm glad you stood your ground and proved your love <3

Well, despite the fact that I dated my ex for four years, I never really warmed up to his parents. His mom was a sweetheart, and was always nice, but when I'm around a boyfriend's parent I just freeze up in fear of saying/doing the wrong thing and having them hate me forever. Although, his father never liked me...at all really. He was only "civil" to me. He somehow blamed me for everything his son did "wrong," even though they were silly little things any other parent (like his mother) would laugh off...and had NOTHING to do with me. Then his younger sister started using me in arguments against her father...boy did that not go over well. She would say things like "Well she was allowed to do it when she was my age!" He really didn't like me after that. :gonk:

I get along with my current boyfriend's father, but I'm still incredibly shy around him. He likes me though...I think. His mom lives on the other side of the country though, so I've never met her.

My mom on the other hand, is like a miracle to boyfriends. She's super nice, and makes them all feel at home right away. Even if she doesn't like them! I didn't find out that she hated my ex until we broke up, she hid it so well. She loves my current though, especially since he's really nice to my little brother. ;p

I've been very blessed that my parents aren't like most Indians and race is not an issue at all <3 a
I'm glad though your boyfriend's mom did manage to get past her racial issues though, and has warmed up to you now!
Just shows how awesome you are!

I did think when my grandparents met my first boyfriend they'd all be O.o because he had really long hair, a beard, and was white, but apparently they thought he was nice guy XD

Man, meeting the parents. With my current girlfriend, that was a tricky one. (With reminder to all that I'm a girl), her mother is rather odd. She's not homophobic, per se, but she is under the impression that her daughter is going through a 'lesbian phase' and is just doing it to make her mad. Now, I met her mom when my girlfriend and I were still just friends, and even after getting together properly, we didn't tell her about our relationship.

Just our luck that her mom happened to drive by and see us walking hand in hand and figured it out. Since then, her mother's opinion of me has gone from "What a great girl" to "She's corrupting my daughter!" and I'm not welcome at their home anymore.

With her dad, it was also a bit odd. It's funny that it's awkward meeting your girlfriend's dad, no matter what gender you are and you still get the "If you hurt her" talk. Besides that, she's also technically not allowed to see her dad, by her mother's rules, so I felt like it was a big show of trust for her to even take me to meet him.

However, as soon as the little staredown-to-make-sure-you-won't-hurt-my-little-girl was done, her dad warmed right up to me and even though my girlfriend's moved for university and is now on the opposite side of the country, he still asks me how I'm doing now and then.

Yeah, my girlfriend's family is strange beyond belief. Meeting and getting used to them was probably the most socially challenging thing I've ever done. xP

I met my boyfriend's mom completely by accident. We had only been seeing each other romantically for a couple days. I ended up sleeping over at his place one night, a totally unexpected decision. The next morning he walks up to me looking a little nervous and says, "So my mom's coming over...like...now. Yeah." Apparently he was staying in his family's town house for a few weeks and his mother was coming over with an appraiser. I spent the next few minutes trying to look as presentable as possible. When I met her, I said hello very briefly and then hid away upstairs and pretended to be busy. The next day, he told me she asked about me and seemed very pleased with me. We've had a great relationship ever since.

My parents are very judgmental. If I don't date a white man, they get upset....then again I found a white man with a strong German/Russian background, and it's still not good enough for them!

When I was dating Natasha, they went into complete denial "Oh they're just friends." basically. They walked in on me sleeping in the same bed as her when she was over at my place for a sleep over, the first time she met them and my parents think it was "just what great friends do"....it was a twin bed.

When I dated Garrett for that one month, his mom warmed up to me immediately. We talked and had fun and she even considered me a daughter of hers! Garrett hated the fact that I warmed up to his mom, because he hates his mom (despite his mom bending over backwards as far as possible to help him). He mainly broke up with me because of that. He later thought it was a mistake, but I can't deal with jealousy/anger issues when it comes to parents.

Every person I've dated, their parents have either loved me or hated me, but it always took them a couple weeks to warm up to me if they liked me. It's kind of a relief that James's parents are passed on, even though James says his mom would have loved me. I don't have to feel torn up because his parents don't like, but it still upsets me that my parents hate James.

I'm always nervous to meet my boyfriend's parents. I have had four boyfriend's counting my current one( and not counting online relationships).

I never met my first boyfriend's parents because they lived several states away. I did talk a little with his mom and she seemed to like me.
My second boyfriend's parents really liked me. They always wanted me to hang out with them instead of their son! One time I watched a movie with them and got sucked into it so much I forgot to say hi to my then boyfriend. I actually kind of liked them more than him. ^^;
The next guy's parents didn't like me much at all. Part of it was because I have fibromyalgia and wasn't able to work. The other reason was not being pretty enough or something shallow like that. They probably didn't like my quiet nature too. His mom acted like she was ok with me but it was obvious she was trying really hard. His older brother was really cold and never talked to me. I tried to talk with him a couple times and he just ignored me. His little brother was really sweet. Feel a little bad for him having such bitter parents.

Not sure what my current boyfriend's parents think of me. They are still warming up to me. My mom doesn't care for my boyfriend and my brother really doesn't like him. Let's just say my boyfriend isn't shy about speaking his mind and likes to discuss touchy issues as does my brother. My dad sees the good in him though. My mom has never really liked any of my boyfriends except for my first one. Although she did complain about how he didn't help out around the house when he was staying with us and for not paying any rent.

I'm not really scared of my husband's family, but I do feel awkward at times. We don't feel the same on some very important political and lifestyle issues and his mom can get quite heated and kind of stuck up at times so I try to take her in small doses.

Oh good god... Meeting parents.

Well I have met my ex's parents, and he met mine as well. His parents are very strange, to say the least. His father is very pushy and is always asking for more of him. He's pretty intelligent, but jesus the guy can't fail anything without being scolded. His father's also very religious. Knowing I'm an atheist caused numerous discussions between the family and a ton of insults thrown my way even though I wasn't really there to defend myself. I actually remember very well the first time I went to his house to meet the family. Not surprisingly, his father looked himself in his bedroom and refused to come out for a long time, causing a fight with my ex's mother who started crying. It was his little brother's first communion, so everyone in the family was there. Long story cut short it was extremely embarrassing and I only went to his house once or twice after that to minimize damage. His father hated me with all his might, his grandfather didn't really appreciate me all that much since apparently he told him to fly off to meet some other chick, and I'm not so sure about his mother. She seemed super nice to me but I can't help but wonder if she appreciated the fact that I didn't show up more often.

NeuzaKC - oh good lord! That's ridiculous! At least the mother kind of stood up for you when he locked himself in his room? Luckily the parent's I've met don't really care about stuff like that. My current Boyfriend is....not so much atheist...but he has his own spiritual beliefs while his family is Catholic. He always dated atheists before...and while I'm Catholic and don't go to church (I don't believe in the church...just God)...he jokes that I'm the closest thing to a Catholic girl that he will EVER date. But luckily his parents don't care. I had another boyfriend whose mom was Jewish and dad was Catholic and they celebrated both faiths in his house and didn't care that I didn't go to church or any of that nonsense.

But seriously...what a crazy family you encountered!