Just out of curiosity... Do any of you ever see things, or your parents do things, that make you sit back and go, "I would never!" I guess I'm curious because I remember before I had my daughter, who is one now, there were always times where I thought, "Oh I SO want to be sure to bring my kids up knowing that," or "I would never ever say what my mom just said to me, to my child..."

For the most part, I've stuck by those things. But you never really know what you're going to do in certain situations, until they happen. -shurgs-

My mom once gave a kid she was babysitting a tub of cool whip, she said because she thought it was ridiculous that the parents didn't let him have any sugar. WOW. One, you don't undermine a child's parents, especially when it's something like that. Two, no one should be giving two year olds tubs of cool whip. When she told me that story I was like WOW, I would NEVER do something to someone's child that I knew they wouldn't want. I also would never give him a tub of cool whip, and now, I'm not going to trust her with my own child! (She has already proven on multiple occasions she can't be trusted with my daughter -.-)

So, do you ever have any of those "Wow, I would never" moments?

Most of the time it's something like the parent yelling swear words at the child or being overly mean to the kid that gets under my skin. I understand a spanking but some parents are a bit too rough. I'm a firm believer that you shouldn't swear at your kid either. That's just wrong and is horrible for the kid's self esteem.

I also would never force my child into a religion or a life style that I'm a part of. I think it's important to introduce kids to a lot of different things and let them chose what's right for them. My girlfriend feels the same way and that's one thing we're sticking to once our child is born.

Wow your mom was probably the coolest babysitter on the block. :0

I don't want any kids but if I accidentally got knocked up or something, I'd do what my parents didn't do and ABORT MISSION. :rawrmayor:

I would never yell at a small child. You can be stern without screaming at the child.

My parents have said they'd disown me if I slept with someone before I'm married, yet they didn't do that to my brother even though he did just that.

Firstly, I'd treat my children the same when it comes to choices they make and second of all, actually allowing them to make that choice for themselves.

I hope to not have to be a single parent for one thing. I want to find a soul mate whom I can spend the rest of my life with.
My desires for my future children are more the opposite; things my mother did not do for me. Because she was a single parent and a new parent with no one to help her learn, my mother supported me(fed me, clothed me, roofed me) but she didn't much raise me. She worked most hours of the day while I would be at daycare or with my aunt or my dad.

I want my future children to participate in activities which will give them practice in skills and will allow them to get some exorcize. My future children will not fall victim to the technology and styles which make today's generations act older and be lazy. I am going to try to give them the REAL childhood that I had.
My mom never taught me much about life, my aunt did most of that, still does. I will teach my kids.

Oh I just thought of a 'never' actually; I would never throw away my kids' stuffed animals and other things behind their backs. It was always my favorite stuffed animals too! Not so much anymore but every so often the habit still manages to re-surface in her to this day. A recently victim was my perfectly good flat bed scanner. Ok sure it didn't like art color for whatever reason(it would gray it all out) but it worked perfectly well with anything else. What could have made her think she didn't need to ask?

I wouldn't let my kid have a taste of beer. Maybe wine. Wine seems to deter little ones from alcohol. XD (as in the lips touching the drink)

And chewing food then feeding the child with it. X_X

A tub of cool whip? Look, it was just once, right?

I know if they said they could have no sugar, I'd give them a piece of candy (unless they had ADD or ADHD) just because. No kid should be banned from ALL sugar. Not saying they should have a lot either.

I would never call my kid a bitch like mother called me. And that was when I was a little kid and still thought my parents were good people who loved me.

I use to baby site this one little kid a few years ago, and the things that came out of her mouth made me question her mother's ability to raise her. There were a few other things that were wrong with her, but they have long since moved, If they hadn't, By now? I'd probably have called child services on her due to how the child was acting, she was showing signs of severe physical and mental abuse.

After that baby sitting incident, My "I would never" ended up being "I would never have children", Why? I'm afraid of what kind of parent I would be. I make a wonderful Master to my dogs, but, that's dogs! I'd be a horrible mother to a child.

I don't want to be a parent myself... But when I worked at a bookstore, I would always see moms come in with little kids, and the kid would be looking at the children's books and ask his mom, "Can I get this book?" The mom would say no, and then spend a lot of money on magazines or romance novels for herself. Like, seriously? You can't buy your kid a book and encourage him to read, but you'll spend a ton of money on yourself? That made me so mad! I would never spend money on entertainment for myself rather than using it for a child.

I don't want children myself, but if I did I'd be scared to leave them with anyone. I wouldn't know if the babysitter is enforcing what I tell them to enforce, or if I have to find a new babysitter because I can't trust them to look after a child. Because if I say no to something and they do it anyways, what else are they doing that I have to question their abilities to watch over a child?

What gets under my skin the most is how different parents are. Some will nuture their children, others just don't care about them and won't do anything about it. Like the other day, I went to the store to pick up some stuff and a mother had about four kids with her. They were rolling around on the ground and running all over the place, I nearly ran over them more then twice.

Add me to the "not planning on kids" roster. But if I did... maybe every kid says this, but most of my "I would never"s come from my mom. Top on my list is: I wouldn't run my house like a totalitarian police state. I believe the job of a parent should be to guide, not dictate. So I would do just that: I would act as their guide in their youth, then once they get old enough to make their own decisions, I would allow them to learn from their mistakes, though I would still advise them on certain things.

Well, not really from my parents, but from others probably. I do think it's ridiculous that the kids parents wouldn't let him/her have sugar but I don't think I'd give him a whole tub a cool-whip. A cookie maybe but I wouldn't go overboard like that lol.

I guess my thing would be what some parents do to their kids in public. I hate it when they completely ignore their kids when they are screaming or crying or discipline them (spanking or screaming)

Then again, I don't have a kid so it's not like I know anything about raising a kid.

My parents did pretty well, all things considered. Though when it's my turn to raise an impressionable young person I'll probably skip the vaguely racist Christmas tree decorations. It's weird, because they're totally open-minded about that sort of thing in most situations, yet the festive little ceramic latino man in a sombrero goes unnoticed...

I have gathered MANY "I would never's" in my childhood due to the horrible foster homes I went through. Keep in mind, I went to about 40 homes before I aged out at 18.

I don't want to surround my kids with nothing but concerns of money and bills. I hated that as a kid, since that's all I heard about growing up, was financial issues. Not so much "I want that!" and not being able to get it because it was too expensive. But I'd often hear my parents arguing about money and they wouldn't have much time to spend with me because they were so concerned with money and finding ways to make extra. :/

I don't want my kids to grow up with any of the abuse that I went through. I went through a lot of verbal/emotional abuse growing up and it really caused me a lot of issues. Beyond that, my parents would always make all of my concerns with being teased/tormented at school as "nothing", and never really listened or at least showed much understanding for what I was going through there. There were a lot of times when I really had to be my own strength and try to get through it all. Top that off with brothers and sisters much, much older than you who also had their hand in bullying you around and treating you as worthless because you're only about 3-4 feet tall.

I do have a much better relationship with them now, and in many ways, it's like it never happened. Which is great. But... I don't want my children to go through that alone.

My mother has a very...interesting stance on alcohol, which I will never, EVER adopt.

Basically, she's been trying to get me drunk off my ass since I was 18. I live in the US, so yes, this has been going on since I was underage. Her aim is to desensitize me and make me more responsible...by encouraging me to be irresponsible every now and then. I don't get it.

The weirdest part is, she doesn't drink.

I am certainly not going to do that to my theoretical kids. I'll allow them a glass of wine with dinner now and then, but certainly not enough to get drunk.

Actually, I don't even plan on having kids at all, but I have a pretty big extended family, so I'm likely to be helping someone raise a kid someday, so I am planning.

YES!!!!!!!! There are plently of times when i say i would never, but most of the time i am right. For instant, i hate that parents let their kids cry for nothing, like if they want something and they don't get it and they cry... Or like if they do something bad and the parent goes stop it and they keep doing it and then the parent starts counting to 5 and the kid gets away with it becasue the parent ends up forgetting.

I wouldn't be able to do that... this is what i have done with my 3 year old step son... when he was about 1 probably a little older he would cry if he didn't get what he wanted... So one day we were at the store he cried the entire time there, all because he wanted some cookies .. me being me.. i said to him if you don't stop crying i am make you cry harder and your not gonna like it. This lady over heard me and was like omg your gonna abuse your baby. i damn near had to hold myself back from slapping her in the face, but instead i calm replied. No there is a difference between abusing and punish your children. I am gonna punish my child the way i see fit. well after leave her with her mouth to the floor, my son continued to cry so i took him to the bath room and gave him a spanking. after giving him 2 spankings i asked him if he was gonna continue and he said no so then we went along with getting what we needed. When we got home i asked him what he learned today at the store and he would try and tell me and i said okay so you won't do it again and he would shake his head no and i gave him a cookie... since then he never does that again. Nor does he run around the stored or resturants.

I believe there are things as us parents need to teach our children and things our children teach us. there are so many things we can teach each other we just have to be patient. its hard being a parent and knowing what to do but when you look back at the way your parents raised you and see how you turned out you would like to think of your children turning out to be as good or even better than you... not worst.

But thats only my opinion

I don't really plan on having children, but I do think that whenever I see someone with horrible parenting skills somewhere.

The best example I can think of at the moment is one mother I saw in a restaurant once with two children, both probably around age four or five. For the most part, she sat there and ignored them until they did something she didn't like, and basically only talked to them to scold them. I don't think I ever heard her say anything kind to them the entire time; she just acted bored and annoyed at everything they did. They didn't seem like bad children at all; they were just climbing around the booth a little, looking around, that sort of thing. And when one of them turned and said something to her with food in his mouth while they were eating, she just gave him a repulsed look and said, "That's disgusting."

Then when the bill came for their pizza, she just looked at it and sighed and groaned about it for a while, despite the fact that she apparently had enough money to purchase the cell phone and what looked to be fairly expensive sunglasses and purse that she had with her. >.>

But anyway, it's just that kind of parents that really get on my nerves - the ones that act like they want nothing to do with their own children, who hardly even treat them as actual people. When I was that age, my parents spent a lot of time with me, and we all honestly had a lot of fun together playing games and making up stories and that sort of thing, and they encouraged me a lot with my writing and drawing and such. Without that, I think I would be a lot different than I am today, so I've always resolved that if I ever do have kids, I'll raise them the same way.