I have a secret...
 

I like that second one. Haha. Makes sense though.

Anywho. I use to have a crush on my boyfriend's bestfriend. When he moved out of state to go to school, his friend and I hung out a lot and I almost cheated on him. But now Boyfriend is back and I got over my fatboy-crush. Dark times. :P

I like to share my secret about the pregnancy I had a few months back, but only to strangers.. Half the time I think they'd be mad and yell at me, but it hasn't happened yet. I don't know..

-I regard animals as better friends than people, because animals are loyal until they die. My cat is my real best friend, and she won't leave me.

(But I'm scared that if she could talk, she'd run out of my life too)

Wow Nikki, that's intense!

Liquid, I remember that Post Secret! :D

- I don't have many friends, and those few that I do have, I can't trust them.

- I sometimes doubt that my boyfriend really loves me, though I don't have a real reason to think this.

- I might be pregnant, and that scares me greatly.

- When I was little, I was sexually molested by a cousin. It was almost rape. Actually, I don't remember much of it, so it could have been rape.

- I can't stand my mom most of the time, and though I love her, her very presence seems to piss me off.

- Sometimes I wish I could disappear and go somewhere where no one would find me.

- I talk to myself, a lot, and find it very comforting.

*phew* I have never ever said most of this to anyone, and I'm still not sure if I should. I'm considering deleting the post, or not posting it at all, but maybe getting it off my chest will help.

I want to contribute to this thread, but I don't really have any secrets other than my actual identity and what goes on in the bedroom. xD

I didn't see this Post Secret... that's actually what I feel? o.O;;
Kya Katsumi:

Lol that's crazy Liquid! Well, there are billions of people on the planet, I'm sure we all have a lot of pretty similar secrets you know? I know for a fact that I've read some secrets in my PS books that were my exact secrets too. Like being terrified of fans coming loose from the ceiling and chopping me. Lol

Here's my secret, and it's a doozy:

-When I was 12 or 13, due to an utter lack of friends that treated me right, I invented an imaginary friend who I knew would treat me correctly. She got out of control. I wound up making her a Yahoo account, and she talked to my other friends, who thought she was real. They loved her. I loved her. She made me feel loved, because she treated me how I wanted to be treated. To me, she was for all intents and purposes a real person. On my 14th birthday, though, I decided that she'd gotten out of control, and out of fear of her becoming too important to me that it screwed up my life, I "wrote her out." I made up this story that I told my friends that she'd died in a car crash. I didn't do this because I wanted pity, but so that no one would ask about her anymore. She would never come back. Her fate was absolute. But it back tofired, and everyone felt sorry for me. I DID grieve her loss, but that wasn't for pity either. I legitimately grieved the loss of my best friend from my life. And every year on my birthday, even if I don't tell anyone, I honor her. She was once real to me. And I still miss her all the time.

I just recently told my girlfriend and a few close friends the truth about her. They were sympathetic and understanding, and as long as she remains real to me, they will treat my grievance as such, because it is genuine.

My first secret? I wouldn't have posted in this thread if other people hadn't been so open, first.

My first, and only, boyfriend was from the internet. I still twitch from the memories I have of him, and I feel insane because I vocally tell myself "no" when I remember him kissing and touching me. I felt so molested after he told me he didn't know if he actually wanted to stay with me. It made me feel unloved, and I still feel unloved. There was no one there to help me get through this after that relationship ended. I don't know how I'm ever going to deal with telling any future boyfriends about him. And how pathetic I felt with only being able to find love over the internet.

I feel so afraid of men and being hurt again because of my last boyfriend that I don't know if I could ever be in a relationship and love anyone ever again. So afraid, in fact, that I have considered lesbianism rather seriously despite knowing in the past that I had no inclinations towards that sexuality. I know it's fear.

Even seeing a man thus gives me panic attacks. I can barely talk to them.

My family is so good at ignoring me that I don't feel like anyone would ever listen to me if I talk, thus I have never trusted talking to friends. I keep myself to myself.

I often think myself unworthy of a family because I've never had one, and wouldn't know how to deal with one even if I did.

I love my cats, but somehow almost everybody I ever meet is allergic to them or hates them, so I don't ever let them come over to my house.

Every time I see my ex I still think she's beautiful. I still love her even though we haven't spoken in years. I pretend not to because I don't want to go through what she put me through again.

Kya, that's pretty awesome!! I'm glad I'm not the only one XD I think I'll share more secrets in this thread as I think of more-- I have so so so many!!

[EDIT:] Alright... I guess now is as good of a place to do this as any other... *deep breath* here it goes. (I will also put it in PostSecret format, just for you!)

-I was molested a few times by my brother when I was really little, but I attribute that to him being really young himself and not really understanding what was going on. He would've been about 9 or 10.

-I lied to my best friend about hooking up with an old teacher just to seem more adventurous than I really am... I lead a very boring a dull life as of late, and I thought she would have left me like all my other friends did if I wasn't spicy enough.

-I'm angry at my boyfriend for losing his sex drive. Its not just because of me, he doesn't even watch porn anymore. He's completely asexual and it drives me up a wall because he was not like this when he was younger with me. Now I'm in my prime and I want sex all the time, and he's older and doesn't seem to enjoy it at all. I try to be understanding, but I really REALLY hate it.

-I have a fear that if I had the perfect body, I would cheat on him all the time. And I hate myself for thinking this, so I stay as out of shape as I can. I remember how much it hurt when he cheated on me online many many years ago, and to even think I would put him through that is disgusting... but he's not giving me what I want.

-Sometimes, I wonder if the voices I hear aren't schizophrenia-- its just a really overactive conscience telling me what a failure I am and how horrible I am.

-I'm addicted to Ambien.

-Cutting gave me orgasms.

I never told anyone that I suffered with addiction. People always think I'm "strong" and I'm not that strong, I just hide my "weaknesses".

If it makes you feel any better, December 21, 2012 already happened by the Mayan calendar. They had no idea about leap years, for one thing.

My mother is horribly emotionally abusive. I know I could make it stop if I told my dad, but I don't want to be the cause of their divorce.

I have a secret sadistic side that I keep hidden from everyone else. I hate myself for having it, and half the time I don't know what to do with it except push it down where no one will ever EVER see it.

Sometimes my thoughts get wildly out of control. I think I must have really good self-restraint, because if I totally let loose, I think I might wind up hurting someone emotionally or physically.

I've considered taking an acting class so I can interact with people easier and display the emotions I want to display instead of my weird facial expressions.

CADFND: learning how to act saved my life in high school. I highly recommend this; your reason was the same as mine and I will never regret it!

Stay strong!! I'll be cheering for you :) Remind yourself you're one of a kind!

I'm afraid of writing out my secrets, for fear that once they are in the open, they may come to haunt me.

I never told anyone that the reason I hated my friend's exboyfriend was that he tried to take advantage of me. It was traumatic for me so I never told anyone except my exhusband. It still really bothers me to this day.

I also tried killing myself by overdosing on my prescriptions because I hated being sick and weak all the time. I still hate being sick but at least now I know I have someone to help me when I get down.

my secret is i get a crush on all my brothers friends.

- I use the school bathrooms period. So if I have to urinate or defecate, I will do so. I actually ran some girls off, somehow they didn't realize it was me, and I just walked off laughing.
x' D

You guys have some interesting secrets! I need to add some more too, but I'm in a rush right now! BBS!

Seriously, there's some deep stuff here. Makes my almost cheating seem silly.

Still, it feels good to get stuff off your chest.