Originally Posted by Cherry Who?

Y'all acting so innocent like you don't know what she meant by masticating.



So is the implication here that the CD was created in days of yore, when people still stored things on CDs? And not, like, something you're still putting things on?

Well, floppies came before CDs, but that's the principle.

And not lately, since there's not much out there I'm currently reading, as far as fanfic goes. I'm far too lazy to troll ff.net for anything good.

Cherry :P I find it hysterical when people use wrong words like that xD

How do you even do that while sitting on a broom, though? Do I want to know? Most likely not.

Mastication.

I have never read any of those fanfics. I do read them sometimes when I'm bored though, and I try to find ones that make sense .. hmm

Should I read the things, or not?

Dooooo it.

haha Which one to start with?

I just finished My Immortal. Well, chapters 1-35. I don't feel like looking for the last four.

I think I'll work on getting through some more sporkings of FSD

Sporkings of what?

Fifty Shades Darker. After finishing FSoG it's so hard getting into the second one.

I've never read them. XD

And oh gosh that fanfic is soo bad

Originally Posted by jellysundae

Cherry :P I find it hysterical when people use wrong words like that xD

It is funny! Almost definitely intentional in this case, though.

Originally Posted by Cardinal Biggles

How do you even do that while sitting on a broom, though? Do I want to know? Most likely not.

Very. Carefully.

Oh, you've started reading it?

It's brutal. The first one is just so terrible. The second one can't match it, but it's just so stupid.

I only got through the first few "chapters' couldn't read all of them.

haha Comically terrible?

Upsetting terrible. A friend over on Gaia cannot get past chapter 16, not even in the book, but the sporking. It gets so bad that they start putting what's actually happening in a dark red color and the stuff that E.L. James wants to convince us is happening is still in blue. He pretty much uses sensory torture, in the form of spanking, on her because she rolled her eyes at him. And that's just the "mene safe" part of the first part of the chapter, which is split into 3. Anna(Bella) feels horrified, degraded, upset, helpless... This is a line from the sporking, the red is from the actual book:

Ana says: “I want to beg him to stop. But I don’t. I don’t want to give him the satisfaction.” And she screams six more times.

I'm not reading this because it's in any way funny. I'm reading it because of a morbid curiosity and how the heck this could have ever been a New York Times best seller. EVER.

I'm sorry this conversation got dark quick...

Nothing makes me madder than the romanticization of abusive, unhealthy relationships. Heeeyyyy, no wonder it came from Twilight, huh.

I didn't think it could get worse than Twilight, until I found out about this.

Saddening, isn't it? Because women of all ages look at both stories and say "I want that." No. Nooooo. Please. Love yourself.

Originally Posted by Alexander J Luthor

I didn't think it could get worse than Twilight, until I found out about this.

*coughMaradoniacough*

Why would anyone want that? The human mind (or at least some of them) boggles me. :\

Well .. it's official, I'm never reading that book series.
Soooo I can't comment on it. I have read Twilight though. All of them.

Someone I worked with leant me the 50 shades books. Like Alex my only reason for starting reading them was morbid curiosity >< I didn't make it very far, it was just too terrible.

The very first line got a reaction out of me that was part


and part .

I should have stopped right there, shouldn't I?

Oh, those parts where she starts talking about her "inner goddess' doing this and dancing that

Originally Posted by Cherry Who?

Saddening, isn't it? Because women of all ages look at both stories and say "I want that." No. Nooooo. Please. Love yourself.

Exactly. It shows how many people don't actually try to understand what they read.

Originally Posted by onsenmark

*coughMaradoniacough*

That freaking- I refuse to do that, and it's really frustrating that there's not a wiki page. Was there an attempted lawsuit or something? Or do people not want to bother having to read the books to write about it. Oh wait- the page I found is actually a full sporking... I'm gonna do it.

Originally Posted by Antagonist

Why would anyone want that? The human mind (or at least some of them) boggles me. :\

What really gets some balls rolling is that she goes right for the BDSM crowd by labeling the abuse as that. And apparently if you criticize her in any way she'll cry then block you on social media. It's happened to a ton of people.

Originally Posted by PapillonCameo

Well .. it's official, I'm never reading that book series.
Soooo I can't comment on it. I have read Twilight though. All of them.

I wouldn't suggest reading it. It's one of those where you should feel free to take a knee. I can hardly read the sporking, as funny as these three girls are.

Originally Posted by jellysundae

Someone I worked with leant me the 50 shades books. Like Alex my only reason for starting reading them was morbid curiosity >< I didn't make it very far, it was just too terrible.

The very first line got a reaction out of me that was part


and part .

I should have stopped right there, shouldn't I?

You're doing better than me. I don't even want to read the actual book, I've gotten enough from the paragraph-by-paragraph snippets from my source.

Originally Posted by SuperZombiePotatoe

Oh, those parts where she starts talking about her "inner goddess' doing this and dancing that

I hate the inner goddess so freaking much. I think they call her severely OOC moments "Steffi" and if only the whole book was about Steffi... but then the book wouldn't exist. What a shame. Or actually it's been suggested that it would quickly evolve into a thriller novel, like that Jennifer Lopez movie where she's running from her abusive cop husband. That would be an interesting story.

Fifty Shades of Grey is a strange book. I read it this summer. Just because I was curious. I also read the Twilight series.