Marriage: Just a piece of paper?
 

Yes, this is a topic about Marriage. Your views on its importance, its relevance, and whether or not you can see yourself getting wed one day, if you aren't already.

Now, the main arguement against it, that I've heard time and time again, is that you "don't need a piece of paper to prove that you love someone."
This is true, and marriage is often seen (admittedly, usually by people who are too young to fully comprehend its implications) as an archaic, out of date, throwback to a time of religiously induced suppression.

So, if you DO believe in marriage, is it because you are religious?

Personally, my own wedding was just a celebration of how much we love each other, but aside from that, it was also practical.
Because we're both students, being married now means that our university fees are now paid by the government; we also get a big, fat grant (not loan) that we'll never have to pay off.

However, there are still other practical reasons to get married:-

For example, if your spouse is seriously injured, the hospital will ask for the husband/wife's consent before attempting any dangerous surgery. If you don't have the "useless bit of paper", they'll have to get consent from their next of kin, which is usually their parents.

Or, if your spouse gets a job offer in another country, say the UK, US or Canada, you need to be legally married in order to emigrate with them. You can be completely head-over-heels in love, and living together, but the rules are still the same- no marriage, no immigration.

So, yes, it certainly seems that the world is still in favour of good ol' fashioned marriage, but what are your views?

thats just what i was thinking...you dont need a peice of paper to prove that youre in love..you can just..be in love :oops:

dam right there if you are in love tell them how you feel i do and have done that soo many times to people ilove (boys not girls) that is what type of person i am i tell people what i think if they do not like they do not like it so what if it spreads and you keep getting called just say at least i can say what i want to and not just keep it in soo no one will evre know

ive confessed to one guy which i feel ashamed of..cause well he smokes..gets drunk..once came home with three girls..another one im pretty sure he knows (well all his friends did) i dont like him as much as i did but i guess the feelings still there(i dont confess that sorta love to girls either..i love other girls in a different way) whats SSI stand for btw?

I have been with my partner for 10 years now and we have set a date to be married on the 26th march 2008.
many people have said why bother it's just a piece of paper,but personally i think that its a ceremony of love.
showing that you love each other and want to spend the rest of your lives together,is a good thing.

You don't need a piece of paper to be in love, but sometimes you need the paper to fully show your love.

Like others said, legal rights for spouses can be crucial. Marriage is a way to say "I trust this person fully to do X, Y and Z". You could probably draw up a whole bunch of legal documents to say the same thing, but it'd be messier.

It's also a ceremony--and like most ceremonies, it's not necessarily practical (although it doesn't have to be the financial nightmare most people make it out as), but it's very significant in its symbolism, even if it's a non-religious ceremony.

To me I will not get married even if I am in love, why? Because I need to see first that he loves me back and 100%. Some guys propose to their girlfriends and cheat on them all the time even though they say they love their girlfriend. I, on the otherhand, want to make sure he is truly ready for me and wants to be with me for the rest of his life. If can't handle my home life ways then he can't handle me at all. Marriage is a good thing and it shows committment though you really don't need that piece of paper to prove anything, but still yet it's good.

The legal benefits of marriage (or civil union, in countries where that applies) are the main reason to have one. I suppose some people do like the idea of a big ceremony to celebrate their lifelong commitment to each other, but it shouldn't be seen as compulsory or necessary.

I've got a lot of issues with the traditional marriage, though that's less because of the idea itself than the baggage that comes with it. The expense, the frivolity, the unpleasant archaic implications of things like the father of the bride 'giving her away' to her husband (just so we don't forget women used to be property!), people changing their names, all that.
But the actual idea is alright, I suppose. I think if I ended up in a lasting relationship and felt I really did want to spend the rest of my life with someone, I'd have a quick and simple registry office job, and make as little fuss about it as possible. It kind of makes sense that there's some way in law to recognise a partnership; just a pity it's tied to all this outdated tradition and religious gubbins.

I am quite against marraige. Who needs a legal binding that costs a ton of money to obtain to make you stay with the person you love. I costs even more to get devorced. People really should try living free.

Who says it needs to cost alot of money?!?

A marriage license costs $55 in almost every state.

wow..i didnt even the contract costs money..can we like not sign one? O_O and what happens if you lose it...

First off it isn't a contract... and yes, you have to sign it. I'm not sure what happens if you lose it. I guess you'd have to get another one somehow.

i know its not contract..but everyone keeps saying paper,paper,paper...trying to not say the same word over and over..how does the state know the couple still has it..that would be funny if every few years you had to show up at this place showing you had your contract and if you didnt you got a fine :lol: its like ok we're still in love with or without it :lol:

It's true. It's actually very inexpensive to get married, the only reason it costs a lot of money, is because YOU want to splash out on it.
Besides, as I've already said, although we didn't know it at the time, our wedding has already 'paid for itself' in the extra benefits we've got.

People lose their copy of their marriage certificate all the time. You can usually obtain another, for example I know the registrar from our wedding has another copy, in case we lose ours.
But at the end of the day, the piece of paper isn't the only thing that proves you're married- once it's all legal, it'll be on the governmental records, and you'll be registered- so then the "system", if you like, records you as being legally wed.

Marriage is supposed to be a symbol of the bond two people share through love. And I say "two people" and not "a man and a woman" because I support gay marriage as well. It is pretty hard to believe that love is the basis for marriage now, what with the ~50% divorce rate in the United States. It seems that the real importance of marriage is money, security, and other benefits.

Always has been. Historically, the idea of people marrying for love is pretty unusual. For all that there's talk of romance, most marriages have been for money and security. I mean, just read Pride and Prejudice for an example of that sort of thing.