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Urbeth
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02-21-2010, 10:31 PM
I am currently in a relationship which I am very comfortable in. I usually don't have a problem with other couples holding hand or hugging or stealing a kiss once in a while. The sweetest thing I have ever seen is a guy kneel down and tie his girlfriend's shoe in winter. So I am not saying that all PDA is bad wrong or disgusting, but I do think that some couples go too far.
I am not a fan of couples who openly grope each other in public. I'm not referring to the occasional butt slap, but the long-lasting and deliberate butt grab. Or couples who grid while making out in public. At that point, I just want to say, "Please, get a room."
I am also not a fan of couples who post all of their PDA photos on Facebook--some of whom are my "friends" (i.e. acquaintances). Some have sincere photos which are sweet, but others look like they are trying to convince everyone that they are supposed to be together which I find annoying.
I know the response is if I don't like it then I shouldn't look, but there are instances when not looking isn't an option. When I was in high school, it was a bit difficult to avoid the couple who were always dry grinding each other in front of my locker or the people who post every time something happens in Farmville with a particularly disturbing profile photo.
So what do you think?
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BlissfulBunny
(-.-)zzZ
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02-21-2010, 11:10 PM
I agree with you 100%. The occasional hug or hand holding is perfectly fine. But there is a time and place to do something any more than a kiss. Like you said, sometimes you just wanna tell them "Get a room.". I have a 12 year old girl on Facebook, post a video of her and her boyfriend making out. First of all, you're way too young. Second of all, no one needs to see that. The occasional peck on the cheek picture is cute. But no one needs to see a full makeout... It's disturbing.
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Admiral Nano
(-.-)zzZ
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02-22-2010, 03:00 AM
I go to a tiny school of about 350+ kids in TOTAL.
My senior class alone is about 50-55 kids.
The hallways are tiny.
So imagine...hormonal teenagers+small hallways+intermingling students.
What gets me off is when couples start to take their innocent kiss to a full out make out. It's a natural occurrence, and all I can say is "get a room" but jeez. Clogging up a hallway to clean your significant others tonsils is not a nice thing to do.
What does irritate me beyond belief is super PDA at a shopping center. Like you said Urbeth, groping, and grinding. Ew...just ew.
The social networking profile pictures are also...disturbing to say the least. There's no discretion anymore. Not even on the internet. I really don't want to see pictures of people playing mouth hockey with each other. Once again...Ew...just ew.
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LadyKnightSkye
Now the Mule of Kin-Akari
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02-22-2010, 04:02 AM
Personally, I get very uncomfortable when I see couples kissing in real life. Movies, enh, but if I'm walking into the dorm and see a girlfriend kissing her boyfriend good night, I have to avert my eyes. I don't think kissing in public is going to far, but it does make me sort of uncomfortable.
Although, no Frenching or kissing body parts other than the face or hands. Anywhere else on the body is an invitation to sin - to put it nicely - and is something that I don't condone in public. Holding hands or placing the hand on the hip, back, or arm is also okay. Again, any other body part is asking for the other person to run back to the bedroom with you, and I don't want to know sex is on your mind when you're out in public.
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Urbeth
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02-22-2010, 04:07 AM
I admit that at times seeing people kiss in public has made me uncomfortable, so when I am with my partner I try to keep anything more than hand-holding to a minimum when people are around. I respect others such that I don't want to force them to see something like that.
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LadyKnightSkye
Now the Mule of Kin-Akari
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02-22-2010, 04:12 AM
Maybe that's a good rule of thumb: don't do anything you wouldn't be comfortable seeing.
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Keyori
Stalked by BellyButton
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02-22-2010, 04:13 AM
I think there's worse things in life than seeing a couple being affectionate.
I don't have a problem as long as I don't see genitals.
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Urbeth
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02-22-2010, 04:16 AM
LadyKnightSkye: I like that rule! ^^
Keyori: I agree that there are worse things in Life to see.
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PocketNerd
⊙ω⊙
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02-22-2010, 06:54 AM
I have to agree that some people take it to far. Such things are meant to be private and they should be done in such places where they are kept so. Society has come a long way to allow hugging, kissing, and general touching in public. It only makes sense, but watching two people all but strip one another bare and come together like base animals is disgusting.
I personally treat my girl like a lady in public. I hold her hand. I may hold her to me by an arm looped about her waist, but I would never all but molest her in public. It is rude and should be embarrassing to those involved.
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Shiruvya
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02-22-2010, 07:08 AM
I don't really have much to add to this because I agree 100% with the OP.
I am not sure if there is really a big debate going on with this even.
I was under the impression that nobody liked to see PDA but sometimes the people who actually commit the act aren't conscious of it being to a negative extent or don't care what others think.
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Subrosian
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02-22-2010, 07:40 AM
I don't really consider PDA as being offensive if it's within reason, but there was one occasion in particular when I happened to see my girlfriend (at the time, she is obviously not anymore) dry grinding with some guy and trying to suck his tongue out of his frickin' skull.
Yeah, it was awkward and disgusting, to say the least, and that doesn't even begin to cover the vast array of pissed off emotions one has when you catch someone you like cheating on you.
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chong69
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02-23-2010, 04:18 PM
PDA can get way inappropriate. and when its in school, it sucks arse even more.
i guess i can say i have had my share of PDA, holding hands and all that jazz. but for the more risque things, i always tried to do them discretely. but i guess we also have to consider that these are teenagers, and can go overboard from time to time.
i guess i can be called a prude now, but lets face it. its not really a pretty sight to see.
sadly, society and a good percentage of the youth today take these things lightly. i guess times have changed, though not entirely to our benefit.
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masked_egg
⊙ω⊙
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02-23-2010, 04:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Keyori
I think there's worse things in life than seeing a couple being affectionate.
I don't have a problem as long as I don't see genitals.
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Okay the way you said it almost made me pee myself! Hahaha!
But I do agree. As long as these PDA peeps don't flash their junk or imitate the act of sex in public I can tolerate it.
I'm actually kind of big with PDA. I don't make out with my boyfriend in public but I'm constantly giving him hugs, kissing him on the cheek and the occasional glomp. I think it's because he's my first boyfriend but I am starting to tone it down. I guess I'm finally starting to notice how weird it can be in public, not because it makes others uncomfortable but because I know people will be looking.
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Urbeth
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02-23-2010, 07:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by chong69
but i guess we also have to consider that these are teenagers, and can go overboard from time to time.
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I find it isn't just teenagers...but some adults!
I have had (not recently) to sit in front of my single mother practically mauling her date while dining out. My mother is well over 50. I would have understood an arm around the shoulders or sitting closer or leaning into him, even hand holding or a peck here and there. But this went well beyond all of that!
I don't have a the expectation that everyone should act there age, but I do find some affectionate gestures can be too much even without genitals being exposed.
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YumikoYoshihana
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02-23-2010, 08:18 PM
I am personally extremely tolerant of PDA's. Part of that may be because i would indulge in such activities myself, and part because on some level, i think its kind of sweet.
Hugging, kissing, LOTS of kissing, touching, whatever, i don't mind. Lots of groping is too much for public though, and anything past that is just.... no. For my senior prom, i saw a couple having sex on a chair (i kid you not) and at my friend's college there was a couple having sex in the corner of the dining hall on a table. These would be instances of TOO MUCH PDA xD.
Interesting note, though.... Through generations, society has been getting more and more tolerant of PDAs and sexual activities in general.... Just think of what people would thing 3 generations ago of what we believe is acceptable behavior now. Our generation sees itself as very liberal, as i'm sure all generations before us felt in their day. I wonder what, 3 generations in the future, will be considered okay then that would make our eyes bug out of our heads now...?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyKnightSkye
I don't want to know sex is on your mind when you're out in public.
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Protip: Sex is usually on my mind when I'm out in public, with my significant other or not, and I KNOW I'm not in the minority.
You will never look at your friends the same way again
Carry on
:D
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MYSTICALAirah
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02-24-2010, 05:05 AM
I agree on that. PDA is okay when it is just holding hands, smack kiss or hugging, cause they are just expressing there love to the person whom they care the most. But when they are way behind that, I don't think so. They are being so unreasonable. Doing things beyond that supposed to be done privately not publicly^_^
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ElysiumFate
There is beauty everywhere.
☆
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02-24-2010, 10:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by YumikoYoshihana
Interesting note, though.... Through generations, society has been getting more and more tolerant of PDAs and sexual activities in general.... Just think of what people would thing 3 generations ago of what we believe is acceptable behavior now. Our generation sees itself as very liberal, as i'm sure all generations before us felt in their day. I wonder what, 3 generations in the future, will be considered okay then that would make our eyes bug out of our heads now...?
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This does make me wonder. Is there eventually going to be a leveling point for this "PDA" trend or is society going to continue on making sex a more and more flamboyant, acceptable, open thing?
Is there going to come a day when PDA is so acceptable that seeing two people having sex on a bench in a park is no longer disgusting and/or disturbing? It is a wonderful thing that sexuality has become so much more acceptable over time, but I think that, even now, it is beginning to go too far. It is a good thing, for example, that we aren't stuck in the stone ages of "fornification" of any kind being illegal. However, sex is something that always needs to stay behind closed doors and out of the sight of everyone but those participating in the act at the moment.
If there so comes a day that flat out sex becomes an acceptable public affair I will forsake the world as lost. We shall have returned to being primitive animals if this ever happens.
I realize this example is hyperbolic in nature, but it is something to be considered. How far will sexual liberation go before it either stops and levels out, or reverses upon itself?
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As per the original question: I don't mind a peck on the cheek, a hug, or holding hands in public, but I reserve the right to barf on sight if I see a couple tonguing each other or anything beyond.
Go ahead and tell me that I should just look away, I will just ask you, "why should I have to?"
Last edited by ElysiumFate; 02-24-2010 at 10:14 PM..
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The Real Nikki
One more time to Pretend.
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02-25-2010, 05:33 AM
A lost a close friend because I said "haha gross" to a picture of him kissing his girlfriend in a very gross way.
People say we complain of PDA because we're jealous or we don't understand, but that is so untrue. We hate it because sometimes it's just very gross.
I mean, when I'm in public when my boyfriend, I act as if my mother is standing right behind us. I know she isn't there, but I wouldn't do things to him in front of others the same as if I was in front of my mom. Holding hands, a small cuddle at the movies, quick kisses of hello/goodbye. Just think about it.
Last edited by The Real Nikki; 02-25-2010 at 05:36 AM..
Reason: blah
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Urbeth
\ (•◡•) /
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02-25-2010, 05:50 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Real Nikki
People say we complain of PDA because we're jealous or we don't understand, but that is so untrue. We hate it because sometimes it's just very gross.
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Exactly! Although, I did know someone who was always very bitter about any innocent PDA in general because she was single and had never had a boyfriend.
Actually, come to think of it, I know two--but the second one was my roommate who was always flipping out if my boyfriend at the time and I would hold hands in our apartment while sitting one the couch. She told us that it was cruel since she was single (but having sex with random strangers on the weekend). Just before moving out, she managed to snag a guy and I walked in on them doing sexual things one day after work when I told her very specifically what time I would be back. *rolls eyes* I don't care that she was doing it, but that wasn't not something that I wanted to see.
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The Real Nikki
One more time to Pretend.
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02-25-2010, 06:05 AM
My gosh, I had a roommate from india that FLIPPED when she found out that I even had a boyfriend. She never met him, of course, but if I said his name she'd tell me to quit.
I guess its just how we're raised.
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Urbeth
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02-25-2010, 06:08 AM
Wow! That's extreme...but I understand your point.
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The Real Nikki
One more time to Pretend.
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02-25-2010, 06:13 AM
My new roommate and I made a deal at the beginning of the year to keep our room PG. Although neither of us brings guys over. Without a tv, the room sucks :P
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Liquid Diamond
Ich bin die morgen stern!
☆
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02-27-2010, 04:39 PM
It goes too far when I have to use a crowbar to pry the couple off of each other just so I can get to my locker.
STOP having sex on lockers, you twisted people!!! :gonk:
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YumikoYoshihana
⊙ω⊙
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02-28-2010, 04:49 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElysiumFate
This does make me wonder. Is there eventually going to be a leveling point for this "PDA" trend or is society going to continue on making sex a more and more flamboyant, acceptable, open thing?
Is there going to come a day when PDA is so acceptable that seeing two people having sex on a bench in a park is no longer disgusting and/or disturbing? It is a wonderful thing that sexuality has become so much more acceptable over time, but I think that, even now, it is beginning to go too far. It is a good thing, for example, that we aren't stuck in the stone ages of "fornification" of any kind being illegal. However, sex is something that always needs to stay behind closed doors and out of the sight of everyone but those participating in the act at the moment.
If there so comes a day that flat out sex becomes an acceptable public affair I will forsake the world as lost. We shall have returned to being primitive animals if this ever happens.
I realize this example is hyperbolic in nature, but it is something to be considered. How far will sexual liberation go before it either stops and levels out, or reverses upon itself?
------------------
As per the original question: I don't mind a peck on the cheek, a hug, or holding hands in public, but I reserve the right to barf on sight if I see a couple tonguing each other or anything beyond.
Go ahead and tell me that I should just look away, I will just ask you, "why should I have to?"
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i'm sure someone from Victorian England would have the very same thoughts as you when looking at couples holding hands and kissing, on dates without escorts, on premarital sex.
It's all in how each generation looks at things.
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ElysiumFate
There is beauty everywhere.
☆
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02-28-2010, 10:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by YumikoYoshihana
i'm sure someone from Victorian England would have the very same thoughts as you when looking at couples holding hands and kissing, on dates without escorts, on premarital sex.
It's all in how each generation looks at things.
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Alright. The heck did I ever say that I cared if someone was holding hands, or kissing, or going on dates without escorts? I AM against premarital sex, BUT I NEVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THAT EITHER.
I'd personally be pissed if somebody followed me about on a date, yelled at me for holding hands with my boyfriend in public, or got angry at me for sharing a quick peck with my significant other.
I will thank you kindly to stop taking my statements out of context. ENOUGH with the red herrings.
I SIMPLY stated that I don't want to see the day when sex on park-benches is acceptable, and I'd rather not have to pry two people with their tongues half-way down each other's throats off of my locker just to get my books.
The ONLY thing you pegged me correctly for was being against premarital sex. Sex is something that teens and people in general are too pressured to do. Why on Earth should I want to have casual sex or allow myself to get attached to someone through the hormones that are released through the act of sex when I am not sure that I care for them? The repercussions are NOT worth it to me. I'd thank you not to attack that belief.
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