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- - I'm so INLOVE (https://www.menewsha.com/forum/showthread.php?t=108292)

Well... Here's the story. I'm a guy and it has been a while i've felt this feeling for my own sexuality. I really do have soo much mixed feelings about this other guy. Both of us met at a volleyball game. It was kind of funny how we met... I was seating on the bleachers and I was watching them warm up. While the team was warming up, he spiked the volleyball right towards me, and it eventually hit my head. He came up and tired to help and apologize.

The next day in school, he had recognized me... since he was always with the jocks and i was always with the "rockers" (sorry for labeling, i'm just short in vocabulary right now) and I was shocked for that he took the time to say sorry once again... and what I heard he really took that time to look for my class.

Now it has been a year and we are close friends not yet bestfriends but you can say that were almost to that stage. And I have so much feelings for him, and i just want hiim to be in my arms for ever. But the only thing is i don't know if his bi or even better gay... But we would always have those awkward moments when we look at each other and smile and that feeling of a spark of love... Last time, it was kind of cheesy, this is what happened i went to grab some popcorn in the bowel and in the same time he went for it also... and we touch hands and we held it for about more then 4 mins... Then we started laughing...

Well lets get to the point... I really love this guy and I hope he loves me too but I don't know how to ask him if he has the same feelings for me. I need advice!

So I can't say I've had much experience chasing the same sex - but I've had plenty of experience cross the boarder from friend to lover. When you tell a friend you have feelings for them they will either have the same feelings, run away, or simply never look at you the same way again. You need to realize that while you are hanging out with him as friends because you like him you are living a lie that can only harm you emotionally.

First an foremost, when attempting to cross the great divide that is friendship, you need to know if that friend is accepting of more physical interaction. The easiest way to do this is to place your hand on his shoulders, arms or thigh. If he jerks away you have your answer. If you can touch the guy on his thigh and he doesn't react badly to it then it's time to talk about your sexuality with him. Let him know you are gay, if he seems interested let him know how far you've explored that side of you, if he is still interested ask him if he has had any gay friends before, and finally ask him if he has considered it himself. If he looks like he is going to blow up on you it should be pretty obvious, just drop the subject and start chasing someone else. If he doesn't blow up on you, but he turns out to be straight then at least you have found someone to confide in.

Then again, I've not chased a guy before, so I could be wrong about how he is likely to react. I'm sure there are plenty of guys here who could give you advice on how they've approached the problem.

it's always hard to approach anyone, but doubley hard if you're unsure of their sexuality. the beauty of the modern age >_< all you can do is talk to him... try to feel out (metaphorically!) if he is interested. insomniac pretty much summed it up perfectly i think.

good luck. not an easy situation.

If you want to have an idea of his orientation before you hit on him (it's always made me uncomfortable to try it without knowing) you could somehow bring up the subject of homosexuality. You could talk about coming out to someone different and their reaction (sometimes I find that an easier way to come out to new people) or you could even just bring up a news story you saw about gay rights, marriage, etc if you don't want to come out to him formally. If he reacts negatively, you'll know that he's either not gay or that he's not comfortable with it yet if he is.

Of course, you'll still have to figure out how to do the rest if he does seem open to homosexuality, and for that I agree with Insomniac.

It's difficult when you don't know if your crush is the same orientation as you are, but you'll just have to approach this carefully. Insomniac has some pretty good advice on this (Yeah, I know I'm now just agreeing with everyone else); hopefully he feels the same way, but if not...life goes on, and you will find somebody someday.

That sounds so sweet. :]
i've never been in your situation- I'm a straight girl. BUT, I have had a boyfriend for three years and we were best friends before we started dating, so I can tell you being friends first helps. We were both too shy to ask each other out so another friend helped us along so I can't help you very much in taking the initiative.
if I were you, I would ask some of his other friends, subtly, about his orientation. Has he ever dated anyone before? Were they all girls? If other people know that you like boys, he may know, too. Just ask him, if you feel comfortable, if he knows that you like guys. Just be comfortable with him and pay attention to his reactions. Body language can mean the difference from "oh my goodness, he loves me" to "better run away"
also, social networking online can help. If you or him have a myspace and/or facebook, there's an "orientation" or "interested in" section on the profiles that can tell you if he's straight, bi, or gay.

Remember, if you are rejected, don't give up hope. There's a person out there for everyone. You'll find your person sooner or later. :]

One thing that makes me think you're probably not going to have anything to worry about is the fact that you both touched hands and you held it that way for as long as you did. And you laughed afterward. That in and of itself is a sign to me that he might be interested. He probably would have jerked away or at least been noticably uncomfortable. I think you should tell him how you feel, but like Insomniac said... be careful.. once that bridge is crossed only few will stick around if they don't actually like you back.

From what you have written
I think there's a good chance that he might be interested,
just drop a few more hints and see if he takes 'em.
Then I think you should have a talk with him,
good luck and I hope it works out for you ^^

I would try finding out what his sexuality is and if he is bisexual or gay, then I would tell him how you feel and go from there. Good luck.

From what i know about guys, if they are not gay they definitely would not linger on a touch. Four Minutes?! It seems like he does like you as more then a friend.

I think to get your answer you should just ask him - is he straight/gay/bi etc etc ... I mean it's a general question and doesn't give away how you feel about him.