I talked to him about it after talking to everyone here, thank you all for your concern too.

everything was good... for a while

but I'm wondering again because (you'd imagine that I'd learn not to do this)

he came home absolutely trashed after work. He kept saying sorry that he was in such a bad state. He said that something felt wrong but he didn't know what when I asked him what was wrong and why he drank so much... generally he doesn't drink that much unless something was wrong.

My friend was going to call his phone when she was coming back to our place so I could open the door for her and when his phone started to buzz I opened it. He crashed earlier so he's knocked the hell out. When I opened it it was only some txts... but I got curious.... bad idea for me.... Apparently he stopped talking to me today (he usually txts me when he's at work) and was txting this girl he knows because she was asking his opinion on getting nipple piercings. She didn't feel good about herself (she's a little overweight but not obiese or aynthing) and they talked about how she doesn't feel good about herself and wants a change and how he wants tog et a tat on his chest but wants more muscle. So what happens? exchanging of pictures of course. He sent one picture of himself without a shirt on for her and then she sent 3 pics of her breasts. how she looks ugly and all that to get compliments out of my guy which he gave gladly. The worst part is that he wanted the pictures. Didn't ask for them though. he said, "I'm a voyeur but it's not my place to ask." or something like that.... I'm not sure what to do. He's not awake yet and I think I'm gonna wait to see if he tells me.... he says that he tells me everything..... so I'm going to wait and see if he does......

I had a problem like this with my ex...he asked if I would be cool with him photographing some girl, and I said it was fine, as he was trying to start a career as a freelance photographer. Next thing I know I find text messages between them discussing how 'provocatively' she should dress or if she should wear much clothing at all...
Even after I got upset and explained to him that I thought it was inappropriate for him to be asking her such things unless he wanted to be a pornographer, he did the exact same thing again. I had to get specific and say I had a problem with the word 'provocative' because to him it meant 'nude'; and he sent her an email two months later using the exact term. I learned the hard way about six months later that he had no respect for me, as he wound up sleeping with the next girl he had 'photographed for artistic purposes'. We were engaged, and I left him on our third anniversary. The very next day he moved this girl into our apartment. My point is, guys like this have no remorse when it comes to indulging their obsessions. You should get out before you get seriously hurt.

Even though this guy may have feelings for you, he is obsessed with women, even if it's only aesthetically. He will only learn the hard way that beauty only runs skin deep. The fact is, he obviously does not care enough about you to respect your relationship. You downplay his actions by saying he was 'indulging' himself--you deserve better than this! What he did is called infidelity and there is no sugarcoating it.

You deserve someone far less shallow. You deserve to be loved and respected above any fetish or obsession. I understand you have feelings for this guy and it will be hard to let go, but the more you let him get away with, the more he will do. He already cheated once--there is no nice term for it but that-- and this should end before he goes all the way. Your past history doesn't matter. If you two agree that you are in a monogamous relationship, what he did was wrong.

My suggestion is to sit down and talk to him; make it abundantly clear that what he is doing is hurting you. If he makes excuses or does anything but apologize and promise to stop his behavior, tell him you are very sorry he feels that way because you care deeply about him, but that you both deserve to be happy and that it's time you each found your separate happiness. Then walk away, and don't look back. You will be happier in the long term, and he *may* learn to be a better person for it.

There is nothing in the world worth getting so upset over, and the fact that you are this upset should spell that it isn't worth it.You may like him [ or love] but I think anything that jeopardizes your comfort with him/ happiness with him should immediately be altered, if not put to an end.
Don't let his narrowed preference melt your self esteem down, because being Asian has it's major advantages in the face department. Hell, some Asian males look androgynous because of the beautiful facial features that Asian's are granted.
Being half Korean myself, I can say that I share your insecurity.
In elementary school, I longed to be blonde with ethereal pale skin.
But from research I realized their beauty and now sometimes think i look too white.
If your boyfriend doesn't value everything about you, you could just as easily find someone who does.
Don't doubt yourself. =]

This post bothers me a lot. I haven't seen you, but you sound like a beautiful person. Don't ever let anyone make you feel less than amazing. My ex made me feel the same way you feel. He had a thing for Asian girls and I'm obviously far from that. Whether he does it on purpose or not, he makes you feel inferior to these girls that he's just supposed to be friends with. Obviously, the three of them have little or no respect for you. It just makes me sad to see a girl who is so sweet feel so bad.

For one, freaking tell him how you feel.
Omg, I'm raging and this isn't even ME that this is happening to.

Maybe it's because I kind of went through the same thing. I would explain what I am going through but I want to give you some advice first. Maybe I'll explain my problem too so you can see how much I can relate.

Anyways, he's keeping the pictures and that in itself is absurd.
GOD. I can't even explain how angry this is making me. SHOULD it make me this angry? xD
I don't know.

Anyways, yeah, tell him how absurd it is for her pictures ((TOPLESS AND NUDE??! SERIOUSLY?)) to be sitting on his phone. I'm not so angry about the clothed ones on the computer because they are for photography :3
Nude and topless ones though... are bad ]:

Tell him how you feel. Tell him how this is hurting your self-esteem and tell him that he needs to care more about how this is effecting you. Not his own wants and such.

Now, for me, I'm with the man I love now for a little over a year. He had a girl who we will call R and one we will call C and they were everything he liked. He liked skinny, small, short straight black haired and small boobied women. Now ME... no no, I have strange tan lines, I'm a little over weight, my boobs are HUGE, and my hair is long and very much wavy and unmanageable.

Now R loves him. He also left me early in our relationship because he believed he loved her too. WE got back together though after he realized that he was wrong ((at least that's what I've been told)) and apparently they don't talk much anymore. Then C had some crazy heart breaking relationship with my boyfriend in the past.

R and C both harassed me because they were angry D;
But the main point is that they were everything he loves. I try and believe that he is happy with my body but I always have that lurking feeling that I'm just lying to myself

Anyways, your boyfriend is making the wrong moves. He is not caring for your feelings and is doing something extremely wrong.
NO MORE NUDE PICS. Tell him to delete them ]:
Seriously.

EDIT:
Sooooo, I just read some more recent posts.
I know it's harder to say than do... but dump him. Dude. No. He is not loyal at all.
I feel like you're just being played. Seriously.

Sometimes the right things and the hard things are the same.
I threatened to break up with my boyfriend when I wasn't happy with his decisions. I was in tears while I did it too because I loved him.
I knew it was better to leave him than keep getting hurt.

Not to sound harsh, but he sounds like a douchebag. I personally would NOT tolerate that kind of behavior from anyone I was dating. You deserve to be with someone who respects you and likes YOU, not some other chick. =/ Best of luck, though. I'd dump him and find someone who deserves you.