I've been crying for hours every day since Sunday because I feel so emotionally attached to my boyfriend that I have been lying up the ass. He said that he was going to go to his friends house even though he promised to talk to me on the phone all day. I wanted to tell him not to go, but I said "Just go, I'll be fine." After I got off the phone with him I started to beat myself up emotionally because we were suppose to be honest with each other, and I couldn't do that. When he called me from his friends house, he said that he'd be able to use their phone, but then 5 minutes later his friend said that he couldn't use the phone, and I couldn't talk to him. After he got off I started crying again, and I felt like an emotional bitch, but I probably am anyways. When he got back to his place he called me yet again, we got into a pointless arguement about Final Fantasy and then he blew up at me. I was so hurt that I stopped saying anything, and then he asked me what was wrong and I said I was fine, but just as I said that I started crying again. I guess it was noticable because he asked me if I was crying but I said "No! I'm fine..." but I think he knew I was lying because he kept on bugging me. I finally told him that I wanted to talk to him more and he said "I should have kept my promise," but I said "It's okay, at least you got to hang out with your friend." Now the thing was, I didn't get to talk to him that much on Saturday either, and the weekend is the only time I get to talk to him at all. He promises next weekend will be better, but I don't know whether I can believe that... I really don't... He promised on Saturday that we'd be able to talk all day Sunday and it never happened. He also knows that his friend has been trying to force us apart, and I think that was the real reason he wanted my boyfriend to go over to his place. I don't think I'm being paranoid at all, I think I'm making perfect sense here. I don't see why I'm letting myself get so emotionally attached to this guy, I feel like we are meant for each other, but I don't know that. I'm only sixteen, I have plenty of years to find my soulmate right? So why is it that every time I'm not talking to him it feels like my heart is breaking into two and I can't breath? Why am I crying every single time I can't hear his voice. I have never been so emotionally attached in my life, but I don't want to make any judgements about him being the one. For one, I keep on lying to him. I haven't been able to stop, even though I promised I would. Maybe... maybe I'm just making my life seem more interesting because I personally feel like my life is boring. I want to be understood, but I want to be understood for me... yes, he knows me, and he knows about my lying problems. I think he even knows when I'm lying. Maybe I'm having an emotional crisis... I dunno. I'm not on my time of the month, I'm certain of that, I just ended it (I know, too much information.) So people, lovely people of Menewsha, do you have any idea why I've been acting so much like an emotionally crippled dramatic crying bitch? Please... I need help.

I honestly think you are being a little clingy.
I understand you love him very much and just your love for him to be refreshed with everything that comes from his mouth.
I had this problem too.
Just give him some space. Recap on the things you love about him inside your head while you do your daily tasks or whatever it is you do.

Plus, if you give him space he will wonder more about what you are doing and where you could be. Keep him guessing a little. add a little mystery to your relationship =)

Sweet mamma jamma that's purple.

Anyway. I think that you're just a little over worried. More importantly, if you're so 'perfect for each other' and you're going to 'live your entire life together' you speak your friggin' feelings. Soulmates aren't going to lie to each other and pretend their life is happy for the sake of the other. Your boyfriend knows your lying and knows your sad, and it bothers him just as much as if he knew why, it's just that he can't help you out while being bothered. He just has to sit there and stew in the misery of knowing you're sad and without help.

So why is it that every time I'm not talking to him it feels like my heart is breaking into two and I can't breath?

It's that high you get when you first get into a relationship. The hormones and emotional comfort all swirl up into the best damn drug you could ever get. The longer you date the more...well, sane, the relationship will seem. If you get to the point of true love, it will be entirely dependent on your personalities. You'll enjoy each others' company for what it is, and won't be bawling every second you're away from him.

I know what you mean, though. My fiance is in Tennessee right now, and I'll hardly get to see him at all this year. It's already been a month and a half, and because his house-mates stopped paying the phone bill he can't contact me except on rare occasions. It's hard to endure, but know that by enduring those moments away from him it proves that your love is strong enough to withstand all pain.

But gaw, that high you get at the start of a relationship is so awesome. I know how it feels to have it cut off. Frankly, I much prefer the sort of love I experience now as it's more long-lasting and not a "come and go" sort of high, but it's still nice.

I can hardly blame you for getting sobby when it goes away and you're left without that rush.

I agree with both of these chicks.
I'm in a long long long term relationship,
and the first 3 years I spent hardly ever seeing my boyfriend.
I was "clingy" like you, I called him every day, I wondered after a while if he had the same feelings for me as I had for him, I'd cry every time he had to leave and we were having a good time, all o' that.

But now that I've been living with him for 4 years it's a LOT more comfortable. It's like I'm living with my best friend in the world, and we spoil each other rotten. =3

Best advice I can give you is to pretend he's there with you when you feel lonely or sick. May seem a little insane, but nobody has to know about it, and (it made me feel TONS better. I was able to sleep soundly for 3 years of school, and his leaving for kung fu, and random hanging with friends...)

Besides, if you're making him call you while he's at his friends' places, aren't you a little worried what the friends might be thinking of you/telling him? I say be cool, let him have his man-time, and you could even collect some girls and have girl-time. =D

you could try to stop beathing yourself up so bad about it.....Ever heard the song "Love hurts"?
Be a little more courageous, and remember that if he is 'the one' then nothing will drive you apart. Learn to trust him and yourself and be open. This is from the ex-way too clingy girlfriend who about had a nervous breakdown whenever she wasn't the center of her boyfriends attention. But when I finally found the person who I am planning to marry, it wasn't like that, because he gives me the strength to be myself, whether he's there or not.
Don't be so hard on yourself.

maybe you should give him a little space? i'm sorry i've really never felt that way before and i don't know your boyfriend, so i won't try to be a smart ass and pretend to know everything about something i have no idea about. From i've heard, tho from my cousins and guy-friends, guys don't like girls who latch on to them and don't let go.

I totally second being honest with your partner because if you have any hope of having a successful and long-lasting relationship you'll need to be able to tell them anything. (Doesn't mean you have to splurge everything, but it really puts a strain on your relationship when there's those 'things' you don't feel comfortable talking about...men aren't mind readers for a start...)

And it does sound like you're riding an emotional high right now. It's like that with any relationship. It does start to taper down and you'll loose that. It's better to find some other activity or hobby to do to give him his own space though, and hopefully to give you more peace of mind.

Well, my question for you is this: do you have something else going on in your life right now that is making you feel so insecure? I've never personally gone through your exact situation but I do know that when I'm extremely stressed I have become the way that you are right now.

Do you have a lot of school work? A stressful job? Or is something besides your boyfriend and that situation causing you stress? It may not be him and his friend. My best advice is to sit down and write in a diary or journal even if you don't normally do so. Write down everything you're afraid of or worried about even if it seems stupid, selfish, or crazy. Just write it down. You may be surprised with what you find out about yourself.

Most people have no idea what is going on in their sub-conscious, and when this happens it can cause physical and mental symptoms if the unconscious stress becomes overwhelming. You're lying may also be caused from your need to cause less stress to yourself.

In the end it also may not be as deep. It's possible that this person just brings out the worst in you without even trying. I have people like that in my life.

I'm also glad that you realize you're young. I am as well. Please don't expect him to be your soul mate. Especially at your age. I am not exaggerating when I say that I have NEVER met anyone that has found their soul mate at sixteen. If this relationship doesn't work out for you one will in the future.