I think I might have panic disorder????
 

YES THAT'S A REAL DISORDER.
Read the title. That's pretty much the issue.
Okay, so yesterday I was thinking about how paranoid I am, after having what I have always called "extremely massive paranoia waves".
Then today I got bored and started looking up phsycological disorder lists on google and I happened to stumble across 'Panic Disorder', so I read it out of curiosity.
It suits me so well it's scary.
I have repetitive waves of extreme fear that basically include the following:

*Way increased heart rate
*Heat waves, sweating, etc.
*Constantly scanning the room with my eyes
*Trouble breathing or hyperventilating
*Sudden feeling of being watched
*Sometimes extreme urge to pace
*Other times need to press my back to the wall
*Sudden fear that I'm going to die
*Extremely jumpy (like, 'don't touch me or i'll punch you' jumpy)
*Overall extreme anxiety
*sometimes i even hear things (like footsteps...) or see things (like shadows..)
:shock:
Etc., etc., etc....

There is more, but I think you get the idea.
I've always just assumed that I'm super paranoid (which i am), but it fits me too well....
I have my "episodes" pretty often, usually at least once or twice a month, or something like that. Usually I'm at home, and I'm usually alone in a room when it happens. Usually. I almost had a heart attack once in front of my mom and jumped from my chair and whirled around, ready to break some creeper's arm or something. I made a lame excuse of thinking i saw a bug on my shoulder (im extremely entomophobic, so it worked). And sometimes it happens in public places, but its much less extreme then, usually.

But I can't be sure.
Do you think I have this disorder? Or do you think its just paranoia and im making to much of this?

Those are all descriptions (you listed) of a panic attack. Tell me in detail how you feel when you have a panic attack. I've had tons of panic attacks in my life and I hyperventilate so badly and think I am going to die because of my heart racing symptoms and problems so extremely that I almost call 9-1-1 sometimes because I literally think I am dying. I can't tell the difference between when I am dying or not and it happens to people with panic attacks all the time. We call 9-1-1 and then when we are not dying people make fun of us, but I literally think I am dying. It FEELS like I am dying and like the entire world has lost control. Worse feeling in the world. It's not a constant feeling either. It comes and goes suddenly at heighten moments of anxiety or fear.

@The Enchanted Tiara- Dang, it sounds like you have it really bad! And that does sound terrible.
It's not like that exactly.
I always do have trouble breathing, either breathing hard and unable to catch my breath, or fullblown hyperventilation. My heart beat gets WAY to fast. or it just stops for a second before getting all fast. I either get really hot, or completely cold (i dont get the second one, but its true), but mainly i just feel terrified. it all depends on what room im in as to how i react. im usually alone when it happens, like i said. usually i'll press my back to the wall and scan the room, searching all over for....something. I usually grab some lame weapon, and try and shut myself up. If you were to walk into the room at that moment, or touch me unexpectedly, you'd get a book thrown at you, or a punch in the face, etc. If my back is to a window during that time, it drives me insane. I dunno, i instantly think of everywhere a person can hide, all the ways a person could get in, etc.
See, this is why i could just be paranoid. It's just that it comes at such random times, it's weird!
the imagining thigs is so creepy. i either turn every little sound into something, or i actually imagine stuff into existance. and then i get more and more freaked out. a lot of the time, im afraid to look at a certain area, because im sure i'll see something.
or, i won't press my back to the wall. I'll pace like crazy. I'll walk back and forth all over the room, digging my nails into my arms from the feeling, gritting my teeth and trying to breath. my eyes will dart around the room and i'll feel heat waves. My heart will be pounding way way way fast.
OR, i wont be able to move.
either way, i feel all terrified and paranoid and unable to breath or really think straight at all.
That sort of thing. It's not usually exactly the same. Mainly terror, trouble breathing, and an extreme need to get out of there!
It lasts anywhere from 5 minutes to an hour, it all depends.
I dunno, even if it is just paranoia. I don't like it and it scares the hell out of me! and it really doesnt seem good for my health.

@Bella- Thank you! Those websites are very helpful.
See, I thought so too! It fit me so well..
I read that you aren't supposed to sit still somewhere. And the music makes sense, but...Why the apple?

Yeah, i guess that would help, but i havent exactly told anybody...I probably should, huh?

Oh, i guess it is late! It was 1:51 a.m. here when you posted, and its 2:13 a.m. now. XD I have insomnia.

To me it sounds like you do have panic attacks then.

I just wasn't sure before because you listed symptoms you read and not what you felt like, but it definitely sounds like you do to me.

Oh...Jeez, and to think i always just assumed i was paranoid! thats been happening for a few years. And im a young teenager, so thats probably not normal...Hhhmm...

yeah, I can see why. it does make a difference.

Oh, and thanks you guys!