This topic is mostly for military wives or people in long-distance relationships.

I'll keep it short:
1) I met my boyfriend in 2005
2) He proposed and after he moved to my state in 2007 (two years later, we have not met in person all that time), we were officially engaged.
3) We spent alittle over two years together, those were the happiest years of our lives.
4) In Jan. 2010, because of the economy and other reasons, I lost my job, he lost his job, he got kicked out of college (I had already graduated).
5) We have not seen each other since this January of 2010... it has now been 9 months apart.

I am going insane here. It breaks my heart to realize that I spent two years of my life in an online, long distance relationship... finally having my soulmate come here and we get engaged, then not even three years later, he has to leave me again. We're back into "online, long distance relationship" mode. He now works full-time at a company that has a branch here in my city...so he can transfer to this job once he moves back.

Fiance is planning to move back here December 18th (that's about 11 months apart). I'm ecstatic but at the same time freaking out. He promised to come back by the summertime, that didn't happen because none of us had jobs. I'm slated to start working next month, although part-time instead of full time like he is. I'm freaking out because I'm worried that something will come up between here and now, that I'd get laid off or he lost his job or something. The last thing we want is for December to come and to realize that we can't live together just yet.

I don't know how long I can stand this loneliness especially with his job making it harder and harder to talk to him =/ How do you military wives handle it? I'm lucky to even get 3 phone calls a week!

Try spending 5 years in a relationship that ended up not going anywhere. I was really into this guy and we had an internet relationship going on for 5 years. Nothing ever came of it because I met my exhusband and we had an online relationship for 8 years before me met and married. While we were married he was also gone for two weeks at a time spending time with his family as often as he could. I couldn't leave because I had to work and his job was less than 20 hours a week at the time so he really had no income to begin with. I wanted to support him so he was basically the "wife" and only held a part time job.

I do think that having a long distance relationship is one of the hardest thing that I ever went though. I am not longer dating anyone that I can not meet easy. It's not worth all the hassle to me. With my exhusband, we would talk for a few hours at night and whenever we could during the day. We tried to make contact as often as possible. We were married for nearly 4 years before we decided that it was not working. We're in the process of divorcing. It's sad because we do still love each other it's just that the distance pretty much tore us apart.

For some people though it works. It all depends on the person, really. In my case, I couldn't stand to be without him. I am poly and do have boyfriends and girlfriends as well but my husband always came first and I just feel so incomplete without him but it's better to let him go and let both of us get on with our live rather than having to have him fly all the way back and forth all the time.

That's a coincidence I'm poly too =)

I found that if I have online relationship with other guys or girls, and I tell myself it's never serious and everything, I can actually stop feeling lonely. I have this thing where pretty much everyone I talk to is my fiance in my head. So whenever fiance DOES come online, I'm like super happy. Unfortunately for me, I got dumped by the other guy, he forgot at the beginning that we agreed not to make it serious, but he couldn't help it and did the "either me or him" thing. I refused to choose, so he dumped me =< Some friend he was >.<

But I'm getting tired of it. If fiance doesn't come back in December I'm cutting my losses. It's really not fair that when I held down a full-time job AND was a full-time college student, I had the time to spend hours with him inbetween homework. I MADE time for him. Even back when we first met online, I had a part-time job while going to high school and being in 4 clubs, I STILL made time for him.

Now he's giving me, what I call BS excuses that he's always exhausted once he comes back from work, he doesn't even go to college. He only works 40 hours a week calling people for bills. I get it, he wakes up in the morning to take his sister to school and comes home at 8-9 PM because he has no car and takes the bus. But he told me his work schedule which is now 11 AM to 7 PM. How is that exhausting? If he wakes up at 6 AM to get ready to take his sister to school, then takes the bus to work (playing on the PSP), and works until 7 PM, takes the bus home or wait for his dad to pick him up (still playing on the PSP), and comes home, he should still have the energy to stay up until 10-11PM.

I just can't help but think he's being lazy, if I can handle 60 hours a week +homework with no problems, then he should be able to handle 40 hours a week. I knew I'd regret him buy the PSP with Kingdom Hearts, because that's all he does now... play that game. Yeah, he spends some time on MSN, but really... in probably one hour, he would respond 5-6 times. =/ And he wonders why I feel neglected and slighted >.>

I was in a long distance relationship for a really long time. We were together eight years before my boyfriend was finally able to move here. The first four years, we were teenagers and too young to move, still in high school, all that. Then after that we went to college, so he was stuck there in college. He got kicked out of his first college, went to a second college, and his parents ran out of money to pay for it so he had to quit college. It was after he quit that I convinced him to move in with me right before our ninth anniversary and now we've been living together for a little over half a year. He has no job and can't afford college and I only have a part time work at home job that barely pays so we're living with my parents and it's not the best situation since they feel like he's just sitting around doing nothing, but at least he's here. I have no idea how long this will last. I'm worried they will get tired of it and make him leave and I can't seem to get him to look for jobs anymore. I don't think he will ever find one, none of the places he has applied to ever give any response. I remember when we were in high school and he got a job I was upset because it took away time he would have spent talking to me. He quit that job after not too long because he didn't have time to do homework, and I was so glad... If only I had known what a pain it would be to ever get him to get a job later on! So I guess be glad he's got a job. Though it shouldn't keep him from talking to you at all. Last year when we were still apart and I didn't work at home, I worked until pretty late at night and still, the first thing I did when I got home was get online and talk to him, even if I was tired. I don't know how military wives do it. I could never live like that, that's for sure. I was able to handle the distance with my boyfriend because I knew he was safe at home with his parents and not anywhere dangerous, and even when he lived in college for a year and a half it made me really nervous and I didn't know much about the people he lived with/near and at one point there was a crazy party in his room with drunk people that resulted in a fight and someone getting seriously injured. I could never handle the idea of someone being overseas and fighting in wars where they could be killed. I won't let him go into the military or anything like that... I've got a friend who suggested it to him since he hasn't found a job, but I said no way, I'd rather him be unemployed than be in danger and be away from me again... Not worth it to me. Don't think it's something he would ever be interested in anyway, thankfully. I've had to put up with distance for so long, now that I have him here, I am not letting him go if I can help it. I don't want him to have any kind of job or anything that would require him to go somewhere else and leave me behind.

There's actually a military service your boyfriend can do. Um, Um I've heard that if he signs up for the Reserves and goes to college, the government won't ever deploy him unless they run out of soldiers to fight in a war since the Reserves are the last to be called on. I wanted to go to the Reserves, it's only a few weekends a month that you're going away from training and then you can be in college, sadly I have disabilities and cannot be in any branch of the military... maybe the Peace Corps >.>