
01-04-2011, 11:37 PM
You're a little older than I am (by about 6 months).
I'm terrified of getting married. My last long term relationship, I wanted to get married to him so badly...And then one day I was hit like a rock to the face and realized...holy shit...marriage is important! I don't want to rush into it. So I've been very careful and thoughtful about it since then, and even turned town a proposal I was offered in that last long term relationship.
If you're really concerned about it, perhaps you should talk to your boyfriend about it. Don't be all, "I don't want to marry you!" because it sounds like you're not ready to decide, and saying no may realy hurt his feelings if he asks and you say no...talking about it will hopefully help you understand his side, and hopefully help him understand your side.
Remember though - The time between the proposal and the marriage can be as long or as short as you want it.
So, if you decide he's the one for you, but don't want to jump the gun, getting engaged and staying that way for a while is a good stepping stone. Some couples stay engaged for years before they decide to take the final step and get legally married.
Others get engaged and shortly after marry.
But, I cannot stress how important it is that you talk to him about it. I don't think he wants to scare you, but, I think he might be looking at marriage a little differently then you, and straightening out what you want/see in marriage between the both of you, is probably a good step forward.
I would never accept a proposal from someone who I'd never had the "marriage talk" with someone first...I have to know my partner is on the same page as me, or I just wouldn't be comfortable accepting.
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