Now, i don't give an eff about it, because he's gorgeous to me and even if he looked like a rock I'd date him anyways because he's just THAT AWESOME.

he's like out of an effing Shoujo. Broad Shoulders, super skinny but still has abs, long flowing amazing hair, and a gorgeous face and eyes.

But apparently people at Six Flags were snickering at me and him according to my mom.

Frankly this pisses me off. Even if he was a girl, they shouldn't be snickering, it's none of their business >.>

and more annoyingly, my well-meaning mother tries to tell me that I should be careful about him looking very feminine. I know she means well, but the only thing this effects is other people's perceptions, which I don't give a rat's butt for.

I mainly needed to rant on this. I'm sure at least 50% of people who've seen us who don't know us have thought we were lesbians, and I've never cared, even joked about it, but it's annoying when my mother says it's some sort of an issue.

So I was wondering, have any of you had the same issue or know something along the lines?

My boyfriend doesn't have a feminine physique, but he has super curly hair that comes just past his shoulders, so anyone not paying attention thinks he's a girl from behind.

But the thing is, with his hair type and facial structure, short hair would not work, it just ringlettes his curls even tighter.

So I can kinda understand. People tend to laugh because he has long curls, and I have short spiky hair. We just ignore it and tell people to f*ck off.

Charlie's (the boyfriend) face isn't super feminine, but he has some of the most gorgeous hair, and a body structure much more like a girl's. he tends to wear this one heart necklace all the time, so that doesn't help, but you would think the complete lack of boobs would aid the fact he's a guy XD

ooh! Long curly hair sounds gorgeous! I've hardly seen a guy pull that off, kudos to your boyfriend! ^.^

If you look in my albums you'll see a picture of him. I adore his hair, and every once and a while he gets it straightened and *drool*. But curls are better

Nope, my guy is very, very male. I'm not attracted to girly men so that helps.

Originally Posted by WinglessFairy

I'm sure at least 50% of people who've seen us who don't know us have thought we were lesbians... when my mother says it's some sort of an issue.

I had an ex that liked to go to cosplay conventions crossplaying in lolita. He was a self-decribed "brolita" (no, not Kodona). He had really long hair too. At times he made me feel uncomfortable because I got vibes that he seriously wanted to -be- a woman. I wouldn't have a problem with this if it was his personal decision, but it's not something I would be looking for in a man I was dating. He would always ask me to straighten his hair and put makeup on him (which would only exacerbate his not-so-attractive features like his bug eyes, huge teeth, or five o clock shadow).

At one convention I was so embarrassed because people actually THOUGHT he was a very unattractive woman. They saw me kissing him and assumed I was a lesbian. I was in tears and he "didn't understand why." I would BEG him not to wear dresses and he would do it anyway. It didn't work out for me so I broke up with him.

However, your situation sounds different to me in the sense that you are attracted to the person you're dating, and him being himself isn't an issue to you. The way you describe him sounds very assured and confident. In this case I would just say "screw what other people think." :)

@Codette Yay for nice hair! =D

oh wow D: -huggles- I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

I guess the one main thing is that Charlie doesn't want to be a girl, he enjoys his penis, lol.

If I had to guess I'd say your mom probably just doesn't want you to have hurt feelings from others - have you tried to explain that it doesn't really bother you?

I've never been in this situation before, but I guess you're telling guys to mind their own biz and leave you alone...
The most important thing is that you are both comfortable with each other :)
All the best to you both!

I think it's similar to any relationship when people judge you for who you're dating. I used to date a Blaxican with a huge curly afro (I'm a fairly white girl and it's obvious) and people would stare at us where ever we went. It got so bad, we rarely went out, we just stayed at home all day. We let people's opinions of us mess up a pretty good relationship. The thing is, people are just curious. They stare because they don't understand. You shouldn't be insulted, instead, show them how you do it. Smile and wave and show them how happy you are. Don't let it bother you all the time. Just be happy you're getting attention. :)

Diave, yes, I told her repeatedly that his femininity is only an issue if I care what other people think, and I don't, so it's not an issue. But she didn't seem to get it >.<

I mean, Charlie's really quite awesome, I'd date him even if he looked like an ogre, and I told her that >.<

thanks Wamaki! ^.^

That's really good advice Algas, thank you <3
I'm glad lately there's been more mixed race couples and more acceptance than what there was >.< I think mixed race couples tend to be very cute looking!

Actually, as an Indian dating a white boy I'd have that issue if I lived in India, or if my family weren't awesome cause they don't care XD

People are immature. If he looks like a she, then so? Make sure you reassure him though because he probably gets junk for it. If you enjoy his company then good on ya

he's super self-confident. He's never cared, he actually thinks it's hilarious XD

though, of course I did ask him about it just to be sure, and got the answer I was expecting. He really doesn't care ^.^

His two brother's are pretty icky ._. so he's said often times he much prefers being associated with females than with them XD

I've never had a situation like that, since I never date anyone. But in someone's perception it will look weird/awkward but it shouldn't matter since you love him for him. Your mother is just being opinionated and it shouldn't matter, which it seems like it doesn't to you. Though in one's perception mind they can think whatever they want, do whatever they want, say whatever they want. If it doesn't bother you, then that's awesome. Keep it up! ^^ Though he sounds very manly/feminine. Personally I have someone I am crushing on and he's very manly like. His face looks like it's always mad but he is not. -laughs- I always tell him that he looks like he is angry but he's not.

People mistake me for a guy. Gender is just a mind set, really. I don't like gender labels for that reason. "Female" and "male" aren't just black and white terms. I think it's cool he doesn't care.

Screw gender stereotypes! Go against the grain, take it as a compliment that their brains are too small to conceive more than binary. Androgyny FTW! I personally adore effeminate looking males and tomboyish looking girls. If I really can't tell, I'm even more impressed. Plus some things are awesome no matter what your biological sex... like eyeliner. Eyeliner is awesome. I'm glad he's confident enough to not actually let it effect his self esteem. There are others out there who are alot more maliable and hurt by the careless garbage spouted by others.

I can't say I have been in this position but I love my boyfriend's hair. I'm mostly attracted to his eyes:heart: They are gorgeous! He likes to hide his hair in his hats of all sorts. Sky and I are kind of on the same level of weight wise. We are both big people but I still find him cute and lovable because of his personality. My best friend April said he doesn't look that attractive but if that's what you like go for it. I told her I love the sh*t out of him and think he's the most sexist guy I'll ever have. Maybe I'm just a sucker for finding someone with around the same boat I'm in. Makes me feel more loved that I'm accepted for who I am and what state I'm in.

Thank you everyone for sharing your stories, weather they're the same issue or not, it's very lovely to read <3

and Crow, thank you! I've never met someone as self-confident as he is while still being humble. It's crazy man!
I'm also loving your sig. LOL the Master! lol!

Laciful, for sure the personality is more important, and if he's sexy to you, it certainly doesn't matter if he's sexy to anyone else ^.^
I'm glad you've found someone you love so much! <3

My ex was very camp, this was probably because he is bi but anyway I always used to get laughed at and told that he was only with me because he thought i was a guy. I put up with it for so long and when he broke up with me everyone felt sorry for me and starting calling him gay and laughed at him behind his back. im not really sure which i found more upsetting.

Yikes!

yeah, I've never understood the beat-up-on-the-ex thing, especially in that manner! >.<

I know its was horrible, but luckily everyone has accepted him for who he is now :D

I'm glad he has found acceptance ^.^

I hope things have worked out for you as well!

Thanks and yeah things worked out well :D

I wouldnt worry about whther people think, their not dating him are they? No its what you think that matters. I hope you can get everything sorted out :)