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. . . Girl Issues >//<
Recently, I was dumped, My girlfriend broke up with me and said she never loved me. Then her best friend told me that she was cheating on me with a man twice her age (We are about 13). I asked her about this and she smirked and said 'Yes, Of course. I don't like girls at all, Not one bit! You just gave me things' I was heartbroken. Then I met my current girl friend, Tylar-Chase. But one little problem, She lives in Canada, And I the U.S.A.. And another big problem. I am still MADLY in love with my ex-Girlfriend, Even after six months of separation... Is there anyway for me to get over her faster? I love my new girl, But not as much as my ex. . . Is there anyway to y'know... Stop loving her?
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Hun I had the same problem a few months go my ex bf broke up with me cause he cheated on me but I don't care about him anymore. If you love her so much you can tell her how you feel about her it is not that hard. Tell her how you feel about her alright.
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You're 13. You'll get over it and move on.
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Yes...I'm sorry dear, but love doesn't exist at 13.
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Not to be mean or anything... But are you serious? You are 13 years old... you don't know what the meaning of true love is... you do however know what infatuation means... but not love. You will get over it, trust me on that. And in all honestly I have a hard time believing that this ex of yours actually was with someone twice her age. But I have to say, your maturity level is not at the point it should be to be tossing around the word love. It's the hard reality. And I am sorry you feel like your heart has been broken - but you will get over it, and things will turn out to be just fine. You are only 13 after all!
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Like my friends in the past 3 posts. Hun, you're 13, you're young yet and at that age we don't know what we truly want, we don't have everything prioritized the way we should. You're still young and have a lot of years to mature much more. At 13 we don't understand what love really is. Yes, you feel and felt something for someone, but at 13 you have more pressures to worry about that you shouldn't cover up with a relationship that is serious. It will only get in the way. Basically it's the thing of setting your priorities in place.
This is what you should be worrying about at 13: School, taking advantage at the free public school system we are lucky to have here in the states, hanging out with friends, and enjoying life. This is what you should not be worrying about at 13: whether or not so-and-so loves you, serious relationships, etc Again, You are young, you will get over it and move on. You'll find that special person whom you will love. But, don't worry about that until you're older. I'm not trying to sound mean, I'm just letting you know that at your age you shouldn't worry about stuff like love and relationships. |
As everybody has said, you're only 13 and surely have not experience enough to say you are in love. I would agree to tell your current girlfriend, as stated in your post, if you love her you would tell her. I'm not sure how she would take it since she's only 13, or I'm not sure how old your current girlfriend is. Though the one you dumped is better if you forget her. She's a using c*nt and you should forget people such as her. D; I'm sorry for what she said, since she is still growing and she will also feel the same way you did when she dumped you, but with a man.
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Mm, you're not going to find anything but drama at your age if you try with romance. 13 is the golden age of pure drama. It will just get worse, but really? High school/middle school is just that. People are immature and know absolutely nothing about love. I know it's hard to get over her, but trust me--times will get better.
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Why worry about dating? You can find love any time in your life. Don't worry about it so much. I'm not saying that because you're young, I'm saying that in general people tend to focus too much on finding "the one" or whatever other term you want to use. When they should be worrying more about making themselves happy being single and not having to have someone to always cling to.
As for getting over someone. It takes time but eventually you'll be able to move on. Also, in the US most places it is illegal to have sexual contact with anyone under 16. The legal age varies by state but it is illegal in most states for anyone that is over the age of 18 to touch anyone that is 13. It's dangerous for a child to get caught up in a "relationship" with someone that much older than they are. Yes, 13 is still a child. Tell a trusted adult about this "cheating" especially if you know she's been having sex or doing other sexual acts with someone that is that much older. It is not a good situation for someone to be in and can lead to more serious problems. |
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You're very young. Very young. I know it's not what you want to hear, because all 13 year olds are mature for their age and know everything and feel very passionately about everything, but you're too young to take relationships so seriously. Even if you are very mature (you seem intelligent for your age), other girls your age probably aren't. Regardless, time heals all wounds. |
I've been where you are.
I'm not gonna restate what's already been said because you know it already. Simply put, if you want to get over someone faster, talk about it. Talk to friends, family, the wall, whatever, and just talk till you're sick of hearing about it. At that point you're over it. Remember that for every time this happens in the future, and it will happen. It sucks, but this is something you will have to deal with. |
I'm 13 as well. I don't want a boyfriend for a long time. As said earlier by other people, GET THE HELL OVER IT.
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Hey guys I have an idea. How about we don't jump all over the kid for feeling exactly the way we all felt at her age huh? Might be the adult thing to do. Just saying.
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Yeah, telling her to get the hell over it was a little harsh. She is still too young for this stuff, though.
The point's been made either way. Let's leave her be, shall we? She's read our posts by now and knows the world's opinions. |
You're only 13 years old. You really don't know what true love is quite yet and you will get over this in time. I honestly think that you shouldn't worry too much about relationships at such a young age and just enjoy being young and still a "kid" while you still can. :) Because once you're childhood years are gone, you will be missing them.
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Awkwardsilence:
Wow. Okay. I say, live life the way that makes you happy. Yes, focus on school. Yes, focus on learning about the world and about yourself. Just try not to stress. If you need someone to talk to about it, I am here and will listen. Drop me a PM or something if you're interested. There are a lot of things that can be very complex and confusing in this life, as well as some very simple and beautiful things. And sometimes as well, the intricacy of a situation is engaging and inspiring. I don't think it's right to stress your age that much. There are so many posts in here about "You're 13"... but I think the picture is bigger than that. I really do hope that you have an adult that will listen to you and accept you for who you are, and is able to listen with open ears and an open mind to give practical, loving advice. Someone that you feel really understands where you are coming from and will help guide you in the right direction. When I was 13 I was told, "You're too young" as well. I am still told that now, at 18. I am happily married to my best friend who I met when I was 14 years old, and fell in love with him. Not everything is perfect about my life, nor do I expect it to be. My mother just passed away, I grew up abused by my father, sometimes in a homeless shelter, other times out of a car, I moved schools and houses all the time, over 30 times in fact within a decade. But... at this moment in my life, even though sometimes I have sad moments, I am happy every day. What experiences you have, some of them are hard to control. Others are up to you. The biggest part about all of this is how you choose to look at it, and what you choose to do. Did you come here to get condemned? No. Did you come here to be scolded? Nagged at? No. Did you come here to get help from people who might know more about this? I think so. So why not get that? Whatever you choose to do, remember to just practice every day and be the person you really wish to be at the end of the road. Dreams to become a nurse or an astronaut, sometimes dreams like those change. But who you wish to be, what values you wish to hold onto and practice at the end of the road... those are the things that most certainly should stay with you till the end. I encourage taking some time to step back and think about what that truly is, and if you know, that is great. If it will take some more time, that is perfectly normal. You set the standard. I want to be loving, and nurturing, able to express my creativity freely, and never be afraid to learn something new. I want to be open-minded, and kind to others, to the point that I have faith in God that whatsoever I choose to sacrifice, everything will work out in the end. I want to be able to warm others' hearts, and inspire others, make them feel alive, like they are living something beautiful. And I want to show my family more love than I ever have before. That is who I want to be. What about you? ^_^ |
I'm sorry you've had that crap hun, but I hate to say it, it's pretty common to have a lot of shallow and one-sided relation ships when you're that young (and why I'm thankful I didn't start dating until i was 17)
I know that you say that you love her, but are you really sure of that? Love is a very special and important thing, it doesn't come as easily as we would like sometimes, though let me tell you when we're young we sure as heck like to blow our feelings out of proportion, and that's fine, as it's all new and it really does seem like a big deal. I know I did some silly things when I was that young cause of boys and the like, and I know how important it feels, even thinking something was love when it's not. But don't worry! You'll get over this ex who was using you soon enough (and probably just as soon this girl will find out how stupid it is to date someone 13 years older than her...but that's a different issue) and be able to fully enjoy your relations with your current girlfriend. Take it casually, don't get too serious about it too quickly, you've still got a while to decide, and to grow and learn who you are and who you want to be, as well as what you want out of an eventual spouse. ^.^ a month is not long enough to tell someone you love them (generally) at any age >.< doesn't mean you should hide in a box either and avoid dating, just be smart about it; learn to love, and enjoy one another, but don't fall for scams and learn to look out for warning signs of behaviors like your ex's. You'll learn as you go, as are we all ^.^ I'm sorry that some people have rudely yelled at you instead of being understanding that while you are 13, you ARE 13 and needn't be treated like your 30 or that you should know everything yet. heck, I'm only 19 myself, I've got crap tons to learn! >.< |
You're so young. Maybe you should prioritize important things first--you know, studies.
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Maroon: Important is subjective. Studies are easy for me, and therefore not important at all. I can do them whenever. Things like love mean much more, and are therefore more important.
She's thirteen. Things like this mean to world to a thirteen year old. I'd imagine she hadn't really been in love before all of this drama. To her it's a giant deal. Very important. Don't chastise her for asking for advice. I love how childishly, everyone is acting by touting themselves above a child. She needs advice. She does not need to be called foolish. Act your ages. |
Hmm. Sounds like you should spend more time with your new girlfriend I suppose,
so you can forget your ex-lover. Stop being in love with a person who threats you like that, she is not worth your time and your love my dear. Sorry to say it like this, but thats just a stupid and mean girl who actualy doesnt know the meaning of love yet, and when she dates older guys and threats you that way, I guess you have figured out for yourself that she doesnt have a common sence. Sorry to hear what happend, I wish you the best of luck with your new girlfriend. |
Hey Sweetie, I haven't read most of the comments here but they do hold some truth.
Unfortunately 'Love' is a very difficult thing, almost an entity, No one really knows what it is, It just is. Does that make sense? I don't want to make it sound like such a menial thing that your 'in love' with your ex girlfriend, You could well possibly be 'in love' in the real sense of the word, but just remember there is no held down definition of that word. No one can tell you that you were or weren't. At young age's though it seems very easy to fall in and out of what you would perceive to be love, It's happened to me, and yes I can sit here and say when I was younger I really did feel like I was in love. However now I'm older I know that it wasn't the true sense of it. I had three boyfriends from between the ages of 11 and 18, I adored each of them, however the bad time's came when those relationships no longer held anything, so inevitably we broke up. Yes I got hurt each and every time because I felt 'in love', but I would quickly get over it. May have been a few months later but :] I was ok, I picked myself up and got on with my life. It seems difficult at first, because it's so fresh in your mind etc but it'll get better and you'll be ok. You should hold onto your new girlfriend for as long as you can possibly hold onto her. Relationships at young ages are very much like walking through a corridor with many doors in front of you, You open the new door and eventually reach the next one, to close it behind you. :] Eventually when your a few years older, you'll be able to learn the difference between (Like what someone above me posted) Infatuation and 'Love' :] I wouldn't worry myself so much Hun at this moment, just enjoy your life as much as you can ^^ Do what you need to do, Make mistakes, make bad choices Make awesome choices, it's part of growing up :] Hold on to your youth and don't try to grow up so fast ok? ^^ I hope everything works out for you sweetie. Take care :] |
Your first loves are always the toughest!
No, there is no magical wand someone can wave and make the heartache go away. But, what you can do is channel the energy and emotions you're feeling into something productive, like art or your studies. :) As a girl when I got broken up with or had my heart broke, I would pick up a pen and just go through paper after paper after paper of drawings...none were ever very good, but it felt wonderful to express myself, and looking back at most of the drawings as an adult, while I feel a tinge of the pain I felt back then, most of what I feel is pride. I lived through it, and prospered. I will do it again, and again, and again. I will not let my fear of being heart broken slow me down, because as much as I know how hard it hurts...I also know that the sun is still going to rise in the morning and I know that as each day goes by I will hurt less and less. Hold your head up, and don't worry about it, k? This too shall pass. |
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