You know I used to be able to write or draw or paint or anything for hours at a time. I used to be able to finish a paper for school in a single night and get a solid A on it. I used to look forward to game every month, and Dag every weekend, and I used to be able o do all of this at once.

Lately though, I've just been tired, listless, I don't know. A couple of people have hurt me pretty badly recently, and it doesn't seem to be getting better.

An old friend of mine got out of rehab at the beginning of the school year. She was doing so well, but now she is dating a jailed drug dealer, and doing heroin. She claims to be "managing" he addiction, but as always that's code to allow her to do it.

Another friend almost killed herself by accident, but she's been so depressed that it makes me worry. I've been down that road and all so. . .

And as always with me, no one will notice this unless I tell them. Not their fault, I just can't express pain anymore. So no one sees it.

The one person who ever really did is off with her ex getting herself hurt again. God I'm tired of watching that. At least this time he's a bit better. Hopefully permanently.

Still, my mind is never at rest anymore. I don't know what to do. Prayer and meditation don't help. Nothing does.

I'm so exhausted. :(

You sound very stressed, and it's your friends that make you worry. I never had to deal with such extremes with my friends but the tired thing I feel, that started when I got out of high school.

Keep your head up, it's just a hiccup in life. I know you care very much for your friends, and would do anything for them, but remember that no matter what you tell them they have to change for themselves. As much as I know you want their situation to improve and keep them as friends, sometimes it's better to let it go. What is a person that doesn't consider your feelings when it comes to serious issues? ( does a friend really do that?)

I don't want to upset you, it's just that when it comes happiness you have to be happy with yourself before you can properly help others be happy. The second part is that they have to want to be happy. (that's something you can help with, but not force)
I don't know if that really helps at all, but I will tell you to do your best and try to worry more about only yourself.

In at least one case if I'd been able to be there she wouldn't have fallen back into old habits. I realize that her relying on me that much is unhealthy anyway, so I know there was nothing I could really do, but. . . *Sigh*

There's this fine balance between having no one need you, and having people need more than you can give.

I have insomnia too. Maybe if you just realize one thing, it'll help. Realize that your young and not every day is promised to you, so you should live everyday like your last. Once you say that to yourself, maybe you'll feel better. It doesn't work every time, but more times then none. I go through some problems too and when I realize that I have a lifetime of good things and bad things ahead of me, I feel a little calmer because I realize that this isn't the worst thing in the world.

Sounds like you're thinking too much and burning your brain out. Mental exhaustion is more tiring then physical exhaustion.
Ah yes. A young Netta once had mental exhaustion. Nothing a little meditation and tea couldn't fix!

I'd recommend making lists. No seriously. For me, making lists of things I like or don't like, animals I like most, favorite bands etc. etc. was actually really calming. It cleared a lot of things up in my head.
Tea is also another thing that fixes up a crowded head.
A cold soda after a hot bubble bath is amazing, BTW.

Meditating and "resting your eyes" (just laying in bed with your eyes shut) is also very calming.

Most of all, you need to stop thinking about negative things and focus on good things. Hence, the lists. Fussing about a problem is not going to solve it any faster. Your friends are hopefully getting the help they need and are trying to straighten themselves out.
Addicts are also very stressful to be around. My stepmother was an addict and I felt really uncomfortable and worried around her. When she got cleaned up, I felt better knowing that she was trying. I know this sounds mean, but if you're friend is causing YOU to be emotionally drained, you need to separate from him until he becomes sober. You need to tell him, "Look, I love you and I only want the best for you and your health. But I do not want to be around you like this. You are not you when you're on drugs and this shit needs to stop. I need you to get clean. You're affecting your friends and your family because of this. We love you and losing you to drugs will hurt us very badly. I would love to be there for you. I want to be your friend. However, I will not be your friend if you are addicted. I'm sorry."
If anything, separating yourself from drama helps most.
I don't want you to feel like you're abandoning your friends in their time of need, but you also need to think about yourself. If this is affecting how you feel and your health, you need to pull away and say, "Look, I need to look after myself."