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Don't I deserve something in return?! D:
Well this is just a rant about the feelings every girl goes through atleast once in her life..
So you like a boy, right? And you SO hard to impress him. You steal extra money from your parents just to buy an outfit, for him. You spend hours before school, and show up late because you were fussing with your hair and puting on your make-up, for him. You put on a pretend smile, and act happy, for him. You spend hours on MSN waiting for him, ignoring your homework to wait for him, you starve yourself, for him, you sacrifice hours of your free time working out to get thin, for him, you practically kill yourself for the sake of his mere attention. Well thats what I've been doing for a certain guy I have a crush on, for 2 years. For 2 years I've been miserable, I've wasted money, wasted time, starved, and more, and he hasn't even glanced at me. The only times he does is to either ask me something about homework, or make fun of me, or hush me, or - this kills me - ask me how another girl is. So, basically I don't get anything in return for my hard work, and that bugs me. And yet, infront of me, he tells how hot another girl is, a girl who has no interest in him whatsoever. Maybe I'm over-reacting, but don't we girls who sacrifice our LIVES deserve a simple thank you? A Glance? A Hug? Anything? I'm not asking for the guy to love me back, or to call me beautiful, I just want him to notice and appreciate my hard work. Even telling me he hates me would be better, that way I wouldn't have to work so hard anymore. So Discuss: - Agree? Disagree? - Ever happen to you? - Am I over-reacting? - Stress on girls/ "beauty" - Ect. |
I think you should move on to someone else. Please don't take this in the wrong way, but I think it's clear he's not interested. Maybe you're doing the same thing to a boy who's trying to get your attention, but you're too busy trying to get crushboy's attention?
You shouldn't make yourself miserable to please a boy you ARE with, nevermind one who you aren't. I don't, however, think that the boy owes you anything - he didn't ask for your attention. I know you can't help who you like though, so good luck with it. And have you told him? Because maybe he's slow - a lot of the time guys don't even know you like them unless you spell it out for them! |
You're trying way to hard to get his attention. Lay off boys for a while and focus on you. Get yourself healthy not just physically but emotionally as well.
If he can't see what's in front of him and would rather go for the unattainable then move on. Relax and be you, don't remember? Take sometime to find out what you want. Any guy worth dating will only want a girl that can be herself. No fake smiles, no crash diets and workouting out when you've got no energy. So relax, and be you for a while, no add ons, you and yourself. |
Honestly, your time could have been better spent, the guy obviously has no interest. Instead of trying so hard to get the attention of a guy who probably doesn't deserve your attention, you should set your sites elsewhere. I'm sure there is a great guy who wants to be with you and you have not noticed because you have been trying so hard on this other guy. If you stop trying so hard, the guy you've been spending so much time on might even notice you. If a guy doesn't like you for who you are, he isn't worth your time.
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Have you ever told this boy how you feel? Have you asked him out yet?
You have to realize that most of us are completely oblivious to what's right in front of our noses. We simply don't notice the world. The perfect person could be dancing right in front of you and you'll never know. If you haven't taken some active steps to get this boy's attention and form a relationship, then he really isn't to blame. He's simply being a boy. If you want something in return, go after it. Trust me, it's easier then it sounds. Ask him out. If he says no, then at least you'll know enough to move on. That will be the end of it. And if he says yes, you'll finally have what you've been looking for. Either way it will b a step in the right direction. Just don't stand there and expect something to happen on its own. |
I'm not sure how to word this properly, but here goes...
"Deserve" is a very strong word. I don't think that your acts should be rewarded by this guy if he's not interested. Two years is a very long time. Did he ask you to starve yourself? Did he ask you to steal money and buy him things? If he did, he's a loser. If he didn't, you need to move on. You deserve a LOT more than feeling miserable for bending over backwards for some brat who won't even see you for the lovely person you are. |
Does he even know you're doing this for him? If someone did something like that for me, but never let me even know they were doing it...I wouldn't know to be grateful. This has gone on two years. As far as he's concerned, that's just the person you are.
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Acutally, he hasn't said he noticed exactly, but he has pointed out ive gotten thinner, and sometimes he DOES SORTA act..well..nice and should I say...flirty around me but that only happens once in a blue moon, so I try harder so that will happen more often. :3
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My advice: Stop for a bit. Live life like he didn't exist. Could be he's playing hard to get, and needs a taste of his own medicine.
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I understand your frustration.
But at the same time, is all this effort you're putting into impressing him worth it? Do you want to be with a guy who would get together with you because of how skinny you are, and how good your makeup looks? To me, any guy who'd get together with you for those reasons sounds like a bad boyfriend. Very shallow. I don't want to sound all after-school special cheesy and "be yourself!" and all that shit, but... seriously. If you bend over backwards like that for a guy that you're not even dating, you're just setting yourself up to be controlled and manipulated in the future. Be strong. If he doesn't like you, then that's his loss, not your fault. |
Babe <3
This is why you invite me over and we have an ice cream gorging. :DDD <333 Stay strong. If you like him that much don't try so hard. But if your over him come into my arms and watch a chick flick. :]]] <33 ilu. PS: YOu owe me Kit-Kat bar/Dibs. |
Aww. I could completely understand how that feels. I used to go out of my way for this guy I liked in high school. I did everything he asked, I listened to him when he had problems, I wasted my precious youth trying to impress him. And then, the very day I was going to actually come out and say, "Hey, I like you," I see him with his arms wrapped around some other girl. And even then, I still tried to impress him, but at the same time, I pushed him away. It doesn't really make sense when I describe it with words.
Seriously though, no guy is worth THAT much time and effort. I know from experience. If he doesn't like you, then just shrug it off and move on. We're women, sweetie. We need to be selfish in order to protect ourselves. Not selfish in the sense where "It's all about me me me me me!" but, YOU YOURSELF must come before anyone else. |
That completely sucks! He could already notices that you are trying hard to get is attention! Not brag how hot others are x.X
Why don't you ask him something like " Could we talk about other things then how other girls are... I'm a girl to you know." Something like this but a bit of a sad face but no cry! Knock it off with the cry. Don't cry just try to show that hurts a little when he compliments others and never you. Even if he is just a friend he should tell something nice to you! Friends are for that right? Guys or girls all should compliment each other :nods: But that's just my opinion ^-^ |
have you even told the guy you liked him? if not then don't expect he's going to say/do anything for you.. obviosly he thinks of you as a friend and that's why hasn't looked at you. :3 how does he know you've been doing all this stuff for HIM? if he doesn't know, he might think you just want to be pretty (for someone else maybe).
and come on, he's not worth wasting your time. you don't have to do all that stuff for him, do it for yourself if you really want to (: Good luck getting that jerk notice you xD anyway I'm kinda doing the same myself right now, except that he's actually my fiancee xD I have self-esteem issues, and I just want to be more beautiful for him, more nicer for him and stuff.. I also want to lose a little weight (I'm not fat at all though), and get a nice firm belly :3 I just want to make him love me more <3 just like the old days when we were a new couple xD |
Sorry, but you can't expect him to have any idea if you don't tell him. And if you tell him you think about him that much he'll probably insult you.
People suck, and honestly it's not worth that much effort. It would be better to just tell him how you feel and then he'll reject you or you'll be over-joyed because you just got the guy of your dreams. And just because you've suffered doesn't mean you deserve anything. If I were to do that thing from the DaVinci Code and like, wear chains digging into my skin all day, that doesn't mean I should... well it doesn't mean anything. I can't take that to MacFresse and ask for a cheeseburger because I'm bleeding, and I can't tell people I should be Prime Minister, or King, or Sheik, or whatever because I'm in pain. Well I could, but they wouldn't put me in power. You can't expect people to give you what you want simply because you suffer the most, or sacrifice the most, or do the most. It's like Fullmetal Alchemist, if you've ever seen it. You can pour as many human lives as you want into a transmutation. You could even use the whole population of the planet as raw material, but you won't get the philosopher's stone. That's not the price. And, in this particular circumstance, you could spend your whole life doing things for him. You could help him get the girl he wants, you could send yourself into debt buying him lavish gifts, you could get up at sunrise to make yourself as beautiful as possible before seeing him, it still won't mean that he'll love you, or even notice you. All you have to do, and all you can do, is tell him how you feel in what you think will be the most effective manner and hope for the best. |
Darling, you're wasting your effort.
You should never have to dramatically change yourself to impress someone into going out with you. If you do, they're not worth your time. Remember there are many more boys in the world, and definitely one who will appreciate you exactly like you are. It sucks to hell and back, but you need to move on. I wouldn't go so far as to tell the guy you like him, even; it sounds to me like he's blatantly uninterested. |
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