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Despairing Girlfriend-What Do I Tell Her?
So my girlfriend and I were talking about her move, and how she has to go get her driving license to say that she's a girl and not a guy [she's a pre-op transsexual], and then goes into this despairing rant about how her friends don't invite her to do anything and that they don't care that she's moving and she's never going to find better friends than they. And then she rants about how she's hungry in a "house full of asians" and now she's despairing over how she's going to be alone forever even though I really care about her. So what do I tell her to make her feel better?
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Tell her you care. I can only imagine what's going through her head with the insecurities of not feeling like the gender she was given and everything. Tell her that no matter what happens to her, that you will always be there to support her and be a shoulder for her to cry on when she needs it.
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wait. Is she a MTF? Or a FTM? From what I read you mean that she is a biological she? Or is it the other way around.
I'm a pre everything FTM transexual... It sucks, everyone in the world thinking your a gender that you so much do not feel that you are. Tell her that you care about her, and that you're her friend. That you want to be there for her. Be there for her. |
MtoF
Sorry about that. |
Okay, MTF. Well, I image it's the same way of feeling to be a biological male wishing so much to be a female as it is for someone like me. Support her in it all. Support everything she tries to do to help herself in the whole transistion. Make to sure to allways refer to her as a her, and especialy in front of people if she wants the to think she is female.
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Make sure she knows you're there. Let her rant to you. Offer advice where you can, and if you can't, just let her know that there IS one person out there who loves her.
I can imagine that what she's going through must be horribly stressful, but it might help her a little if she knows you're there to hold her hand through it. |
Let her know that you truly do care about her and that you're going to be there for her no matter what...honestly when I'm having a bad day or just...have been upset recently, I find that when my boyfriend holds me I just feel AMAZING...and suddenly everything that's been bothering me is gone for now. So maybe just invite her over and do something really special for her (like make her dinner) and then watch a good movie with dim light and cuddle...I love cuddling.
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Just hold her in your arms and tell her that you love her no matter what but you must mean this and your tone of must show it (if you mean this then this part will be easy)
She most likely will continue to feel/act this way for a while but when she does just do the same thing over. Just support her and finally she will come around. Hope this helps. |
Just be there for her! It doesn't matter if everyone else goes away under the strain. I've always believed in quality over quantity. One awesome friend is a heck of a lot better then a thousand fair weather friends. Also, I'm assuming she's taking hormones? Wouldn't that be like when full scale puberty hormone wise?
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