Friday there was a football game that I had to tend to with a guy. We went there with Justin and Brooke to watch homecoming since it was homecoming night. Of course the person I didn't want to win won. [grumbles and rambles] Anyway, the problem is, earlier that day I had asked my friend Nicole if she by any chance knew something about one of my ex boyfriends going to the game. Her eyes never once gazed into mine so she kept looking away from me. Eventually she told me no.

Is it just me or is it some girls don't appreciate their friends going out with their exs? It's just wrong to me, so Nicole and I had this pact. She ended up breaking it that night because she brought along my ex boyfriend into the situation. They sat right across from us but to make matters even worse - my ex boyfriend brought my other ex boyfriend.

To make matters ten times worse, Nicole was currently talking to some guy named Shafer whom she told me she liked a lot and still spoke to but went behind his back that night as well as went behind my back. She lied to me to my face about taking my ex boyfriend to the game with her, which I wouldn't have been so upset with her if she just didn't lie! It makes things ten times worse whenever someone lies.

Did I have a complete legit reason to be upset with her? I went to the point of even telling her that I just didn't trust her any longer after my ex boyfriend threw f bombs at me and told me to mind my own business. I know how stupid and pathetic he is because he asked me to be friends with benefits, so I'm sure he's doing the same with her although he has a current girlfriend to toy with and do whatever pathetic guy's do with girls they use. :/

Questions

Did I have a complete legit reason to be upset with Nicole for going behind my back like that and for lying to me?

Should I have socked my ex boyfriend in the face that night?

I just hope that I didn't make a mistake telling Nicole that I shouldn't trust her anymore. This isn't the first and probably won't be the last time that she does stuff behind my back and lies to my face about it. She is the reason why a ton of people are upset with me because her big jabber.

SORRY THAT THIS IS LONG.

I think you do have a legit reason to be upset with her, not only is she fooling around with your ex, which just isn't right, but she lied to you about it. No, I don't think you should have hit the ex, that would only have lowered you to his pathetic level. I hate guys who feel they have every right to toy with girls like that.

Originally Posted by Yeah

I think you do have a legit reason to be upset with her, not only is she fooling around with your ex, which just isn't right, but she lied to you about it. No, I don't think you should have hit the ex, that would only have lowered you to his pathetic level. I hate guys who feel they have every right to toy with girls like that.

Phew, thanks so much. I wasn't expecting for anyone to read my bunch of jumble. I really appreciate it and appreciate your opinion.

No it isn't right, but this definitely isn't the first time she's went after an ex of mine. Of course she's lied a lot but I guess over the years, this finally tweaked a nerve.

She just doesn't sound like much of a friend. There has always been an unwritten code, girls friends don't date each others exes, it is too close to home. I hope you have some other, better friends you can talk to about this, talking will make you feel better.

Originally Posted by Yeah

She just doesn't sound like much of a friend. There has always been an unwritten code, girls friends don't date each others exes, it is too close to home. I hope you have some other, better friends you can talk to about this, talking will make you feel better.

I actually do have more of a better friend, someone whom I could trust with my life, but she just told me to not to worry about it. She told me she never once liked speaking to Nicole, and that she was a backstabber so why even deal with her. I guess she is right, but my heart is too big to just smash somebody up in the face. Actually, Nicole did apologize to me earlier today through text messaging, but it still doesn't fill in what she destroyed.

Oh, boy. If this isn't the first time she's been a sneakysneak, then you definitely have legit reasons not to trust her.

Perhaps it's because I, myself, have no exes, but I can't really see myself getting mad at a friend for dating an ex, unless I broke up with them because they were a total asshole and said friend knew this xP

But if you two had an agreement, and she has a reputation in your friendship for being a sneakysneak, then it's okay.

Sometimes, it is okay to punch someone in the face, and I have to admit that this may have been one of them. It wouldn't have been great, but it wouldn't have been terrible, y'know? :B

If you do consider her a friend, though, I'd suggest somehow telling her that your ex played around on you. Not necessarily like, "HE CHEATED ON ME AND HE WILL CHEAT ON YOU, TOO, BOO BOO ACCUSE ACCUSE!", but as a loving sort of warning thing.

Well one thing is for sure. You're deffinently intitled to be upset with her for lying to you, especially when you asked her point blank. Perhaps her earlier behavior should have been some kind of indication, but I'm sort of glad that you've told her that you don't think you can trust her anymore. I'm sure she understood the pact you made, and having done things to break trust in the past, and now this? She deffinitely doesn't deserve your trust anymore. I just hope you can hold to that in the case of what I'm assuming is a close friend.
As for the ex-boyfriend thing. I'm nowhere near entitled to give advice on this, but I'll assume she knows why you two broke up. That more or less means she knows what kind of guy he actually is, and if she wants to be with that type of person, it isn't your responsibility to bang your head against a wall trying to save her from it, and I think it would be fine to tell her you don't want to be around him, and conciquently don't want to be around her when they're together.

Your ex sounds like a very special breed of jack***. I hope your friend is pleased with herself. ;]

Eep. I had a friend who did something like that to me once.
It was an ex who I was NOT over in the least, and ironically enough, I had told her the day before that I wasn't okay with her dating him. I said it in a mostly joking manner, because I never thought it would ever happen...
But then, two days later, there he is, making out with her.
I was PISSED.
Thankfully, it didn't last too long. She said she was 'sorry', but if she was really sorry, she wouldn't have dated him in the first place...

Anyway. After awhile I managed to forgive her and get over with. It's not worth ruining a whole friendship over one silly boyfriend.

I personally think that dating friends' exs is okay, so long as you know that your friend is okay with it. Just because you dated a guy once doesn't mean you have a death grip on him. But since you're not okay with it... well...
Yeah, you have a reason to be upset with her. You also have a good reason to not trust her, since she straight up lied to you. That's not cool.

If this isn't the first time, either... I would start to doubt how good of a friend she is.


TO SUM THINGS UP, SINCE I PROBABLY RAMBLED WAY MORE THAN I SHOULD HAVE:
It's not worth losing a good friend over one stupid guy, but this friend isn't a friend to begin with. Ditch her.

(You should have hit your ex. XD I would have.)

Omg, thanks everyone for the advice and input that you had to give me.

This guy definitely was a hottie, but it was someone that just screamed prick! He was the type that would lead you on while going behind your back with like another girl saying to them about how he wanted to be their friend with benefits cause that's all he wants to do. All he wanted to do was make out for like twenty four hours straight, and have some girl pleasure him in some way that I don't really think was o__o human... XD BUT...anyways.

He was a freak. But a hot freak.

As for Nicole. I appreciate all the input on this too. @[email protected]; [sigh] I just I don't know. I was in complete awe whenever I saw her with him, then to make matters worse - he zoomed in her car, since he was driving, and it ironically was right beside me. Oh well I suppose. :/ People come and go in your life. Some are there to make you stronger. Some are there to comfort you. And some are your support stacks.

Thanks everyone! <3

Lovvy - >_> I regret not punching him XD. Or atleast spitting on him.

bah, when your friend realizes he's only using her, go bash that guy together! D:

I think generally I always stick with my girlfriends because guy troubles are always annoying but I guess ou need to work out what is more important. I think maybe talk to Nicole and find out what she is really thinking and then come up with a plan where you think you can work together and know that you can trust her because you'll be working with her to work out whether or not this guy is a user. So I hope things work out between you lot though

Originally Posted by woopdidoodoo

I think generally I always stick with my girlfriends because guy troubles are always annoying but I guess ou need to work out what is more important. I think maybe talk to Nicole and find out what she is really thinking and then come up with a plan where you think you can work together and know that you can trust her because you'll be working with her to work out whether or not this guy is a user. So I hope things work out between you lot though

I already know that this guy is a user because he went behind my back whenever I was dating him, so I gave up on him, then a year later comes down and I end up falling for him again. He and I start talking, but then we got in a big fight so Nicole goes to him and starts speaking to him behind my back. It's just a bit slappish in the face whenever I get lied to in front of my face and then she comes and shows up with the guy whom I had recently liked to the Homecoming game.

I have tried my hardest to figure out her reasoning, but never once do I understand her. The thing that I've came up with is that she just loves and appreciates attention so she'll do anything to get it. She even made up that she was pregnant to get some guys all gasp and shocked to her. She was the one that had to beat Brooke to having sex with a guy so she could have something to brag about.

I believe me trusting her against is just out of the question. No, I don't mind to speak to her, but speaking to her about crucial things that I don't want to tell other people.

Lol, I used to have a friend like that. She goes on MSN, and she is a really fun person [ myspace also kind of person, there is such a breed, right? ] she lied about mostly everything, even stealing my friend's DS, or stealing some money I had in the back.

Well, I gave her the finger and never talked to her ever again! xD My other friend says she has gotten worse, and she is gonna ditch her soon too. [ I leave is as a choice for my other friends if they wanna hang with her, I don't really care. I give a warning though, don't want to freak them out too much though ]

Also, it is a good reason. She sounds immature, I used to be like that too. She is doing it just for kicks, I think. Maybe she likes it that you don't understand her, and it amuses her how you react and stuff, or how you don't react. I dunno.

Originally Posted by kimu

Lol, I used to have a friend like that. She goes on MSN, and she is a really fun person [ myspace also kind of person, there is such a breed, right? ] she lied about mostly everything, even stealing my friend's DS, or stealing some money I had in the back.

Well, I gave her the finger and never talked to her ever again! xD My other friend says she has gotten worse, and she is gonna ditch her soon too. [ I leave is as a choice for my other friends if they wanna hang with her, I don't really care. I give a warning though, don't want to freak them out too much though ]

Also, it is a good reason. She sounds immature, I used to be like that too. She is doing it just for kicks, I think. Maybe she likes it that you don't understand her, and it amuses her how you react and stuff, or how you don't react. I dunno.

Hm, she finds my reactions amusing? That's funny if so. XD. She's put herself a nice littel reputation at my school, and now she is the school whore XDDDD