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Poet~ Oh don't worry you didn't scare me off or anything. It's probably a subject most of us don't like to think about in to greater detail. Past the dressing up I don't think about anything it just seems to much.
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Indeed. I want to rewrite it someday, because I think marriage politics are important.
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Well... I wish I could just think about that stuff... but... well, that part just isn't me anyway... but I have to think about the sociopolitical elements of it. I think if more people thought about ti enough, more would feel the same as me. It's just that people get stuck in... I don't want to say a rut, but I guess that's the best word for it... a rut of tradition, and tradition is so dear to them... I just don't like it because the tradition is rooted in things that... I'm totally opposed to... and I don't like to just have ethe shells of things either. I want something complete, and I don't want the parts that I don't like so it would require that I take it in a whole new light.
Edit: yes, Chexala. And how appropriate. |
Do you think of everything so completely or just this. It seems you have spent a lot of time contemplating it all. For myself it hasn't been so much since I don't have a guy I would want to marry or anything.
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My beliefs are very developed in some areas and I see the problems and I want to find solutions, the trouble is the problems are so deeply rooted in our society that you have to do a lot of digging to get to their bottom. I just do a lot of thinking in general. I really can't help it, it's just my mind starts whirling when I'm met with information I don't like.
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I know what you mean poet, I don't want the hollow shell of a tradition either. I imagine that if/when I marry, my partner and I will create a ceremony of our own, which may or may not have anything to do with tradition.
The dream I had when I was with my last boyfriend involved us going off into the wood alone for our vows and consummation, and then coming back later to celebrate with our families, etc. No church, no witnesses, no expense, just us. |
Haha... consummation in the woods? Sounds messy... but yes that's what I mean.
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Haha, yeah. A picnic blanket would probably be a good idea.
But yeah, I figure, the vows should be more for the couple than for society anyway, so why invite anyone else? :D |
Well yes haha. I dunno, I don't have a particular idea in mind. I would just want to be clear on what I am not willing to do with my partner before he starts getting ideas of his own ;-;. Often men will want to have the more traditional ceremonies... after all it has never been in any way restrictive to them.
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I haven't exactly been to too many weddings so I don't know what to expect but if I had a wedding I wouldn't want it to be a huge thing in the first place. The last wedding I did go to dragged on for hours and it just lost all meaning to me (dunno about others but I couldn't here what was said anyway). I would want something that was brief and meaningful not something that dragged on for all hours of the night. Anyway a wedding is only the official part I beleive you would already beleive yourself married and tied long before the paper work was signed.
(dunno if that was completely relevant but then I don't know all that much about the subject; detail wise and way. Those are just my thoughts on the matter but now I must to bed I will see you all tomorrow) |
Actually the wedding is the ceremony, the marriage is what it demonstrates. ^^. I don't have to have been to a wedding to believe what I believe... because what I believe is not based in weddings, it's based elsewhere. Er, this may seem silly but can I ask how old you are? I'm seventeen myself .----. I know it doesn't seem I should be thinking in such depth about all of these things but as I said, I really can't help it. I would really prefer to be ignorant of it all, then I wouldn't have anything to object to... but as it is, I know and I object.... and I have yet to see a solution that wouldn't require a lot of hoops.
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Eighteen actually and like I said I know I am ignorant in this area and before today I never did give it much thought.
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Hah, yes, men can be very traditional. After all, they usually rule the traditions. Times are a-changin' though. More and more, people are breaking traditions and making their own. Like, cohabitation is getting much bigger these days. Sweden actually legally recognizes cohabitating couples alongside married couples. That blew my mind when I read that.
By the way, totally random, I was just looking at your hangout, and the title. I thought of a totally different song, Girl by the Beatles. o__o |
What's it called now? I don't quite remember. But I love that song <333. I mean it's quite pretty. And I should hope they are changing. I'm gonna have to pick one of those damned men XD. I mean, not have to, but if I'm to pick a partner it will be a man, and it'll have to be one of the men who actually exist XD.
@Aeisha: Well I hope you don't take anything negative away from this conversation ^^. |
Oh, haha... right now it is the lyrics from Girl ^^;;.
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Oh, was it something different earlier?
Haha, yeah, if we could have our pick from among the various lovely fictional men available, we might none of us ever date a real guy again. Or maybe we would though, or at least, I would, because a lot of the fictional guys I like are dark characters, bad boys, wounded silent guy types. Like <cough> Snape. |
Nothing negative to take away
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Quote:
And of course we wouldn't date real men XD. You know though, that would depend on whether they were only as in-depth as the author made them, or if you could shape them to your own will... if they had like, blank spots in their personality and history... I'd rather date real guys XD cause that's worse than any personality flaw... @Aeisha: *hugs* Okay, that's good to hear ^^. I think I've been a little much, haha. |
Heh, yes. Our fictional men would have to be complete people, otherwise, well, it'd be a little like dating someone with amnesia. Which isn't that bad, but it would be an extra challenge.
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Or worse... depending on how you imagine the blanks to appear, haha. Like I'm talking... there's just absolutely nothing there. They'd just freeze or die or something.
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Oh yikes, yeah that would be bad.
I guess we'll just have to content ourselves with daydreams and find someone among the real and living. XD With 6 billion people on the planet, I sure there are lots of good ones though; it's just a matter of finding them. >__< |
Then you take away the ones that are gay, that are taken, that are too young, too old, terminally ill or experiencing other damaging conditions, then take away the ones that are in totally different cultures (who think women are like, a lower species...literally...) and the ones who are strongly religious... narrow that down to the ones who share interests with you, and have a least some sort of look going for them, then make sure they're also interested in you... XD.
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Haha, well, when you put it that way, yeah it does narrow things down quite a bit. XD
Kinda makes me miss my ex. #__# |
Yeah now you see what I mean XD. Those are why I'm glad I have yet to have a boyfriend...
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I'm not sure I understand that second sentence... :/
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