What happened to Robin Williams? O_O

---------- Post added 08-12-2014 at 12:39 PM ----------

Never mind. Found out [cry]

yeah... i'm been crying since I found out yesterday...

Depression really is! It's nothing to ever joke about. I've struggled with depression for a few years now (a lot of people wouldn't be able to tell as I've gotten good at hiding it when I get into bad times, but a few people who know me pretty well can tell) - I'm usually ok, some things set me off, but I've got a great support that I usually turn to when I feel things getting bad, to talk things through with.
but I agree, it really is sad! :(

[hug] Jeannesha: ♥aka jeannie beannie, GummyBearKisses (GBK) Gummy , I really gotta think of me a nickname lol anywho I thanks you ever soo much you are a wonderful gennie =)

How do people talk about, you know, what they're feeling and thinking and all that? I've never been able to do that, even now.
Seriously, how?

SZP: It can be hard, and I do struggle with talking about how I feel at times. It helps to have people around you that you know you can trust to talk to - at least that's how it is for me.

Yes, that does make sense. But, I dunno why, my mum says I can talk to her, so does my aunt and my close friends. But, I just... can't! Sounds silly [XP]

I can understand though - sometimes those who you are close to, you don't always feel comfortable talking to about personal stuff because they know you well. At least that's my issue. I can't talk to my mum and sister, but I'm fine talking to my hubby. I'm just picky. [hug] You're not alone though, I know there are others that are the same out there as well. It took me ages to find people that I was totally comfortable with - it took me years to find those two people. [hug]

Sorry if I sound like I'm talking in circles - I'm exhausted and I think I need a nap.

you can't... you keep it bottle up inside until one day you break and stab someone in the eye with a spoon... I'm just waiting to see who that person will be that breaks me. . .

i mean...

i'm not depressed...

or secretly angry at the world.


or a time bomb waiting to explode on the next person that tries to use me...

I find too that even with a small handful of people, there are days when the littlest of things break me, and things go downhill fast.

Those are days when I refuse to let myself get online. So y'all will never see that side of me.
It's not a pretty side.

We're conditioned from an early age to expect nobody to be willing to listen. And anyone we try to unload on, as necessary as it is for our emotional well-being, generally gets fed up rather quickly, because it brings them down.

Some people even have to pay someone to listen.

I've learned that the most important thing we can do is learn to listen to others. And the next most important thing is to learn how to change the moment.

Dwelling on pooh-ey thoughts is unhealthy. So it's important to get them out, but not to let them linger, or dwell on them.

So when I'm listening to someone unload, I let them get it out a bit, and then turn it around as best I can and get them to see the good things, too. The next thing I know, they've found something better to talk about, and we're both cheered up and doing better. Really, feeling better is worth a million tons of understanding to me.

Now I just have to find someone willing to do the same things for me... and I'll be all set.

Vera: That's not necessarily true -it all depends on how one was raised, but I wasn't raised that way. I always knew that my family was there for me, I usually always went to my twin for listening whenever I needed someone to listen to me. [yes] But honestly saying that we all are that way, is just assuming. It all depends on the person.

I've had boyfriends say that my one flaw is not telling my feelings... Yet i've had to bottle things up because my feelings harm others. they don't want to hear it. they can't stand seeing me cry. they don't believe my pain to be real. ect...
I've tried the therapist route, and was told that to fix my problems i needed to behave more like a female and shop at abercrombie and other crap name brand stores that i'm not interested in going to.

i need to be more like THEIR daughters. well i no longer go to therapists. and i will never trust anyone with my true feelings.

With feelings, I've learned that bottling them up harms me so much more. I hold things in and the pain eats at me.
I'm still dealing with stuff that's happened to me for years that I've bottled up, but is slowly starting to come out - I'm getting better at not keeping my feelings inside as I realize that it's harmful to myself to do that.

yeah... i have been bubbling over like a soda pop.

I dunno, I'm at a point where... I feel that if I don't talk, I'm going to end up in a really bad place. I know that I'm not in a good place at the moment. But, I just can't!!! [headdesk]

SZP: I remember being at that point. [hug] I really do wish you the best and I know it may not help, but my inbox if always open if you need to just talk. [hug]

The fact that people care does help, so thank you [hug]
I just need to find a way to... let it out without talking, you know [XD]

You're welcome, dear. [hug]

Would writing it out help any?

That's one of the problems. When I was in school I could rock that. I could write everything out in a poem and feel really good. Now, for some strange reason, I've lost that. I've tried, yes, but end up getting half way through and just feel numb. Like "What the hell am I doing?!" and then I'll end up scrapping the whole thing. So, writing is tough at the moment. We're still trying, though! [illgetu]

Don't TRY to write anything specific. literlly just take a piece of paper. or a notebook. and right every thought that comes to mind. doesn't matter if it makes sense. just write. get everything out. and if you dont' want people to see it. ever... burn it. burn all those bad feelings away. :D