This thread is for me. I am looking for ideas and help from other writers. I am personally going to be posting my stories in clips for support. I stress that this is NOT for people to criticize but for people to Help me. Oh, and NO PLAGIARISM!!! Thanks.

Here I go this is just something I was thinking about. Please comment and tell me what you think.

Lifecycle Part 00.01

There I was fighting the balance of the universe. The fate of the world lay there in my hands. I looked down at my dirt covered hands which were green and brown with a yellow tint around my wrists. Three years ago I would have marveled at the sight but now they seemed taboo. Like I was holding a cursed object in my hands and knew my fate was a miserable one that could only end in defeat. Looking up at the smoke covered horizon I felt prematurely conquered. The fields of ash that lay in front of me where a mighty red wood forest had once thrived brought tears to my eyes. I fell in grief sitting on a still warm log. I thought of the beginning as if it was the end and my memory slowly fed into my consciousness.

Here's an old story I was working on.

Thorns Part 00.01

Her hair was held in loose elastic on the back of her head. She walked with her eyes staring off in front of her looking at nothing and every thing at once. She did this quite often. It made her feel safe to not look at the ground in front of her. To not know what’s happening. [EDIT]It comforted her to not think about the unpredictability of the world and the hatred it contained.[/EDIT] She had just gotten out of school for the day and she was on her way home. There were many other people around her and yet she felt alone and held back.
Every day when she woke up she would lie in bed and try to act like it was a weekend; like she didn’t need to wake up; like she would have plans to do and something enjoyable to think about. She never succeeded in this lye more then ten minutes and it always made her day start worse.
“Hey Anna.” A voice called behind me. I didn’t recognize the voice or the presence but she felt someone there. I stopped and stood frozen in position. I didn’t look back but I knew there was someone walking up behind me.
“Anna, I didn’t see you in home room this morning. Where were you?” After seeing her face, I realized why I didn’t recognize this person’s voice or presence. It was Courtney from her homeroom and science class. She was normally too busy to talk to anyone, especially me. Her boyfriend was in all of the same classes as her. They were also part of the popular group so they had no reason to even look at me.
As soon as I recognized Courtney I started walking again. Courtney looked confused; she probably didn’t understand why I didn’t start worshiping her.
“Anna?” she shouted behind me. I really didn’t want to talk to her. She had every thing, looks, brain, and personality. I had nothing. I was bland and dumb. Nobody liked me and I didn’t like anyone. I sped up, suppressing tears until I got home. I knew that I wasn’t going to make it and sure enough I broke down at the corner down town next to an old, run down, pawn shop. I darted in side hoping nobody saw me. The last thing I needed on my plate was people thinking I was crazy. I found a small corner near the jewelry and crouched down out of site to cry.

Here's another much older story that my girlfriend really likes. It includes most of my friends and real life places.

The Cured Part 01.01

Heather looked up from the game of magic, bored and with the look in her eyes that she didn’t want to play any more but as she stared, that look vanished from her eyes. As I stared at her I saw her expression change from sheer boredom to pure anxiety. “Jessie,” she shouted and I snapped my head around. I saw what looked like Jessie but he was covered in blood and walked like he was traumatized. He had his left hand grasped in his right and was swaying back and forth shifting weight from one foot to the other. He stopped by Jeff’s car where he would normally be parked.
Jessica strolled into the room and saw Heather and me paralyzed with fear. Jessica’s eyes followed ours out through the garage door past the green van to Jessie who was now standing back to with blood smeared on the back of his shirt. “Jessie,” she shrieked and walked out to see him and Russell walked in the room behind her without a word. Jessica stood in front of Jessie and was just staring at him. Jessie was swaying back and forth and as Jessica reached out to put her hand on his shoulder he swung his arm out and hit her with such force that she was knocked back ten feet and proceeded to slide on her back another five feet. Her head hit the pavement with a thud and she rolled over moaning in agony. Jessie stammered after her as she tried to crawl away.
Heather and I had just enough time to stand when Russell shot past us toward Jessie. Jessie had just enough time to look up before Russell full on tackled him. Russell hit Jessie, his shoulder slamming into his bloody chest. Jessie fell back with all of Russell’s weight and momentum forced onto him. Jessie stood up quickly and ran off in a slow jog. Russell rolled onto his foot and braced himself up on his knee. He acted as if he had been hit by a car. But that didn’t make sense? Russell was the one that had tackled him. I ran over to Jessica with Heather behind me and Russell was looking around presumably for Jessie.
Jessica had skinned her elbows and back, blood was trickling down her neck slowly and her ear was cut. She was semi-conscious and tears were flowing from her eyes into her ear wound. The salt from her tears must have caused the wound to sting horrendously. I stood up and ran back to the shop as Russell knelt down to examine her head wounds. I grabbed a towel inside and filled it with ice and hollered to Jeff in the back room “Jeff, Hurry. Jessica.” I figured he would want to know if his girlfriend was bleeding on the pavement outside.

Here is the next part of Thorns. Hope you like it. :D

Thorns Part 00.02

After a couple of minutes I started to wonder if anyone was running this shop. I stood up and looked around. There were no cameras, no cashiers, and no cash registers.
After a good look around I noticed everything seemed really old, there weren’t any electronic items, not even a radio. There was jewelry, books, canned goods, a few articles of clothing, and a lot of drawers. I started to read the binding on the books. There was everything from herbal remedies to voodoo. I wasn’t into that stuff, but the jewelry was intriguing me. I walked over to the display cases but a glimpse of light in an otherwise dim room caught my attention. It came from the corner of the counter. It was an ornate full length mirror reflecting light from the window across the room with a torn curtain that let in a sliver of light. As I neared the mirror I noticed that it wasn’t the torn curtain at all that was causing the light at all. It was a figure in the reflection. It was a person I saw as I stood directly in front of the mirror. This person looked just like me but was smiling and had a white robe on. Her long flowing black hair looked like mine and her face. There was something very different though, I couldn’t figure it out. After a couple of seconds the image began to fade to an actual reflection.
“Well if it isn’t Anna Elisabeth Maculae.” A startling voice whispered across the room. Shocked and Scared, I looked in every direction trying to find the source of the mysterious voice. There was a rattle of wooden chimes and an old man appeared from behind a wooden bead curtain that blocked view to another room.
“How did you know mine name?” I questioned, trying to sound assertive.
“I don’t get a lot of customers; I try to remember who stops in.”
“But I haven’t ever been in this shop before? In fact I haven’t ever even seen this store before and I take this route home every day.”
“So you see why I don’t get many customers.” The old man smiled and walked toward the jewelry display case. I walked over and stood looking down at a necklace that caught my eye. It was a very thin chain that was dull and tarnished. On the center there was a clear egg shaped crystal. It had what looked like veins through out its center. It was an amazing piece of art.

Reserved 05

Originally Posted by Hayate

Here I go this is just something I was thinking about. Please comment and tell me what you think.

Lifecycle Part 00.01

There I was fighting the balance of the universe. The fate of the world lay there in my hands. I looked down at my dirt covered hands which were green and brown with a yellow tint around my wrists. Three years ago I would have marveled at the sight but now they seemed taboo. Like I was holding a cursed object in my hands and knew my fate was a miserable one that could only end in defeat. Looking up at the smoke covered horizon I felt prematurely conquered. The fields of ash that lay in front of me where a mighty red wood forest had once thrived brought tears to my eyes. I fell in grief sitting on a still warm log. I thought of the beginning as if it was the end and my memory slowly fed into my consciousness.

Hayate, I really think this was very well written. I'd love to read more sometime. I find this piece very intriguing; the way you write out of order of the events is something authors don't commonly use, but it's definatly what hooks the readers. Please write more. Keep up the good work, hun. ^^

To Clair:: Thanks, here's the next part.

Chapter 01

Lifecycle Part 01.01

Waking suddenly to the sound of the floor waxer was starting to become a habit. Seeing as I never had any commitment other then my work I wasn’t really too concerned. I pealed an environmentally safe plastic folder off my forehead and tried to recollect the previous night. I could vaguely recall that something important happened. I racked my brain trying to think of something more specific. Glancing across my desk I noticed that I had not left myself any indication of what I had done. I had been leaving myself notes recently due to my morning amnesia and since there was nothing I figured it really wasn’t that important.
I began my ritual rounds of inspection and attack. The first thing I always tackled is the lab rats. Every Thursday they need to be cleaned and their food and water needed to be checked every day. Today was Wednesday and that meant I had to water the plants like I did every other day for most of them and the first Wednesday of the month I watered all of them. Today seemed fairly normal and yet I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was forgetting something.

I really do like it. ^^
I'd love to continue reading.

Wow. I really can't wait to see the development of life cycle. :) I'd just add two tiny comments. On Thorns, you may want to add something about the world being unfocused because she didn't want to see it clearly. Don't do that if you fell it isn't right, of course. And on the Cure, you have a Jessie and a Jessica, it's a little confusing. You may want to consider changing that. (Although you said they were real names, so I can see why you'd have it that way.)

To Fairywaif:: Thank you. I see what you mean about Thorns, I was a bit unclear about her means of why she doesn't wish to see reality. As for The Cured, I don't feel comfortable changing the names due to their connection to people in real life. However I can see how its confusing. though I do think maybe adding a nickname will suffice and loosen some mental conflict.

I hope you post some more soon. They're interesting and really varied so far.

Originally Posted by Hayate

IThere was everything from herbal remedies to voodoo. I wasn’t into that stuff, but the jewelry was intriguing me. I walked over to the display cases but a glimpse of light in an otherwise dim room caught my attention. It came from the corner of the counter. It was an ornate full length mirror reflecting light from the window across the room with a torn curtain that let in a sliver of light. As I neared the mirror I noticed that it wasn’t the torn curtain at all that was causing the light at all. It was a figure in the reflection. It was a person I saw as I stood directly in front of the mirror. This person looked just like me but was smiling and had a white robe on. Her long flowing black hair looked like mine and her face. There was something very different though, I couldn’t figure it out. After a couple of seconds the image began to fade to an actual reflection.

Right at the beginning of the quote there, there is "Ithere" I think you mean there.. a small spelling error no big deal.

it might sound better if it said "a glimpse of light an otherwise dimly lit room" and perhaps instead of "an" use "the"

hmm.. there are other corrections I see, but I don't have the time at the moment to point them out. *blinks* it has a lot of potential, you just need a good editor. You did a good job though. It's going to be a great story I think. Remember that reading a lot helps you be a better writer. It also shows you many different writing styles so that you can perfect your own style. There are a few other spelling errors.. There's online spell check, and spell check on the post thingies in the upper right hand corner, so that will help.