in need of help and tips
 

i love to write, but i know i make lots of mistakes, please help me to correct any mistakes, tips are always welcome, thanks for any help.

:::::::::::::::: Memories & fears ::::::::::::::::::
Today, i had another fight with Rena, sure mike stopped it, but the things she said, it brought back so many painful memories, from the time we were still at home, and the time we were here, some things, are even a secret to kayan, mike and Patrick, and i hope, that i will never have to go through those memories again, yet, some fears have never left me , i know it sounds childish, but a thunder storm, is my worst memory and enemy.

Two painful events, each occurred during a storm, like the one that we had now, as I look outside, the sky is so dark, yet flashes of lightning, are the only moments, that you can see the rain, the wind, and the damage it leaves.

As a thunder fills the sky, I find myself taking a few steps back, my eyes closed, as the echo of the thunder, still lingers in the air, I feel a warm hand on my shoulder, and turn back to see kayan, the look in his eyes, it always makes me feel calm and save, he doesn’t know what troubles me, I don’t think it’s a great idea to tell him, it was just a memory, even though each second, of thinking back, brings me so much pain, the only ones I can share this with, are the people who know the fear I feel, Duncan and Jaden, they were in the same position as me, for a moment, the lights go out and flicker back on, I step back as I hold my breath, for a moment, I feel like a child again.

Suddenly, the lights in the castle go out, it seems that the storm has created a problem, not only in the castle, but everywhere in rayoja, there are no lights, only the light, that comes from the burning fire place, I hear kayan, as he says that we have to light some candles.

I sit down, in front of the fireplace, holding back my tears, as fear wrapes itself around me, two arms hold me, in a gentle embrace, so much warmth, only jaden, is able to make me feel calm wright now, he whispers to me, that even he thinks back, on what happened that night, each second, still stuck in our minds, but we have to stay strong, we just have to.

All three of us, remember that night, at the moment even more, because of this storm, Duncan sits next to me, I can see it in his eyes, anger, fear and still he stays strong, he has always was the toughest, even during that night, the night, that we were lured from the place we called home back then.

It was on a Monday, the weather had been great during the day, and suddenly, the night was cold, rain poured down without mercy, and lighting lit the sky, followed by the loud roar of thunder itself, as I close my eyes, I see it once more, each sensation, each drop of rain and the wind, that plays with my nightgown, I find myself running down the streets, no shoes on my feet and my hair stuck to my face, I am not alone, jaden and Duncan, each hold my hands, as we run towards an old building.

The night had began so peacefully, well as much as it was possible, our parents paid no attention to us, they only had attention, for the money or television, as I was lying in my bed, I heard the most wonderful sound, much to my surprise, I realize it is a violin, I wondered, who on earth, would play a violin outside, during a storm like this.

I climbed onto my desk, and leaned against my window, outside, a man was standing on the edge of the fountain, for a moment, I could swear he smiled at me, for some reason I could not ignore this, it felt so warm, each second seemed to be an hour, as I closed my eyes, images flashed through my mind, a loving family, someone who cared about me, to feel happy the entire day, instead of feeling so lonely, I was not allowed to play with my friends, yet in my dreams, I played the entire day, without knowing how and why, I was standing in the rain, wearing my nightgown, holding on to my favorite plushy, a brown colored teddy bear, he was my most valuable possession, no, he was my friend and companion, I walked up to the man, and sat on my knees in front of him, I didn’t care about catching a cold, all I wanted, is to feel calm and comfortable, and he gave me that feeling.

Suddenly he stopped, as I opened my eyes, I noticed he sat on his knees before me, his lips held a gentle smile, and his eyes, held a gentle sparkle, he gently reached out his hand, as if waiting for a handshake, I carefully, placed my small hand, onto his hand, he stood up, and pulled me along, I could not feel the cold anymore, I didn’t feel the cold rain coming down on me.

I asked I a whisper, who he was, he replied with a smile, as he claimed, to be the one who would make my dreams come true, a loving family, and everything else that I desired, I was surprised at this, how was it possible that he knew my dreams, my desires and even my name, I had never met this man, until that evening, the feeling of being save, turned into fear, as I looked up to him, I noticed that friendly smile had vanished, and had been replaced, with a smile that would be equal, to that of a wolf who had cornered his prey.

Slowly I stepped back, yet his hand reached out once more, this time reaching for my wrist, before he could get a hold of me, I heard a familiar voice calling for me, as I turned around, I saw my two best friends, both soaked thanks to the rain, they reached for my hands, and pulled me along as they started running, we heard the man curse out loud, as we ran towards a old building,
Both had wrapped their arms around me, while I hugged my plushy, with both arms, we heard he was coming closer, his laugh made us shiver, as his shadow was clear to be seen on the floor, we went further into a corner, he had not spot us yet, and we hoped it would stay that way.

Suddenly, a hard explosion rang through the air, the ground was shaking a bit, which caused the man to lose his balance, his violin was broken, and we were able to run away, yet he grabbed Duncan his wrist, and pulled him back, Duncan ended against the floor, his lower left arm, open thanks to a old rusty nail, this time, jaden and I were dragging Duncan along, we knew only one place to go, the towns doctor, Patrick silver, sure there were going to be questions, but we promised, never to answer any of them, this was our secret, our fear, and our memory.

And here I was, staring into the burning fireplace, while a storm was ragging through town, I looked next to me, and noticed, that Duncan gently trailed the scar on his lower left arm, something that would never leave, something that would always remind us of what we had been through.

The lights of the castle, finally worked again, as we heard kayan, mike and Patrick enter the room, I stood up, and hugged them gently, telling them how happy I am, with the family that I love.

Tomorrow would be a better day, the beginning of a new memory