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CrinkledStraw
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#1
Old 04-25-2007, 05:05 AM

I'm not sure where I'll take this, if anywhere, but it was fun to write.

"The Morning Battle"
A single high-pitched whine tinted with urgency drilled its way into my ear. There it was again, higher now, even more insistent. I could rollover, pretend I had not heard that sound that invaded my sleep, but neither of us would be fooled. Instead, with the greatest of stealth, I opened one eye no wider than a sliver. As expected, the source of the whining noise greeted my sleep hazed vision. He stood there, sixty-five pounds of tail-wagging persistence, with his cold, wet nose inches from my own. There would be no fooling him now, he knew I was awake, he had won the morning battle as he always did.

I rouse with a muffled groan, muttered my terms of surrender to the barrel-chested ball of fluff who had conquered me and my peaceful sleep, and rubbed my eyes as I made my way to the peg on which his leash rested. As the metallic clasp jingled in my hands he erupted into a yelping, wiggling mass of canine. He was gloating over his victory and anticipating the spoils of war.


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v9...cture018-1.jpg

sychobunny
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#2
Old 04-29-2007, 04:49 PM

XD I like. Gee I wonder where you got your inspiration? ^.~

one edit: roused- passed tense, keep it that way.

You keep the mood well, along with the voice.

I looked at the picture of Corky first, so in the beging I wasn't too sure if you were a dog or you... but your you, which is better.

 


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