Second Best
 

I'll never be the same to you...and yet, I'll be the same as everyone else in your eyes...

You have not guilded me a fine cage, nor cast me a paramount pedestal...I am not the one you value most...and I know that I can't hope to be. There are those you view differently...those who I am most certain that, despite your previous denials, you are in love with...

And may I stress in love...for there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone. I love you...I care for you deeply, would mourn your loss with grave intent, feel warmed by your kind words and thoughts, and feel safely guided by your smile...

And while I can not bring myself to say it, for fear of how your reaction would codemn our interaction with one another as companions, I wish to tell you that I hope you love me too.

Even in just that sense, and nothing more. If you told me just once these words, I would never question the depth of your care, or the quality of your feelings. I should not envy those that captivate your attentions more fervently than I...and yet, I feel cast aside in regards to this...

Why...why is my genuine regard for you and your happiness thwarted by the anticipation and demand brought forth from your more basic passions? If you would, and indeed I understand the selfish nature of this request, but if you would at one point at least tell me that despite how you behave, that if I were attainable...if I wasn't so far off into the distance that you've placed, that you would want me, maybe, just maybe, more than others...

I would never want to keep you to myself...That, is too grave and selfish of me...in more senses than I can name now...But...I would like to know that you favor me...it is my own selfish wish...to hear you say that I am more desirable to you than anyone else...that you would be happy with me and no one else, if that were possible...

You'll never understand...and it pains me to know that I can't reveal what I really feel. You wouldn't want to listen...you'd just get upset, despite what you'd deny prior to my confession...

So...go, I beseech you. I will smile, though inside, my instincts writhe at my conscious to tell you that you deserve better...but you'll never find it because of the low quality of some personal standards...

You'll never want me more...I'll always be...

Second best...