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InSaneWeTrust 08-17-2007 05:44 PM

Remembrance (408 words)
 
Remembrance

Do you remember the day we met? With the mulitcoloured sky and your disarming smile, I was enchanted. We sat in stillness as the sun of the new dawn rose. In that silence we spoke a thousand words to each other. Do you remember?

Do you remember those bracing days by the shore? The ones when you would laugh gaily and toss your hair into the salty breeze. Where the wind would brush our backs and the waves would crash at our feet. The few words you spoke had the gentleness of the soft breeze and the power of the crashing waves. Do you remember?

Do you remember those frosty days in the snow? How you held your head high and towards the sky, your mouth open lightheartedly, yet elegantly, to catch the falling snowflakes. How the snow quietly fell and kissed our cheeks and clung to our clothes and eyelashes. We were as quiet as the falling snow and the few words you spoke were chosen carefully and never unnecessary. Do you remember?

Do you remember our autumn walks in the woods? We tiptoed through the flowers so we wouldn’t disrupt the butterflies who always welcomed a sit on your warm finger. The wind would dance with the leaves and caress our cheeks. I spoke of many things, most not making sense and you listened like a patient mother does with her child. Do you remember?

Do you remember those lazy days by the lake? Where we would wade in the cold water and the breeze would push gentle waves against our legs. How the sun reflected on the drops of water that we playfully tossed at each other. Our laughs echoed and you spoke and every word you carefully said you confided in me. Do you remember?

Do you remember the day you left? It was late and the stars were trying to outshine your smile that even in sadness was so bright. The rain gently tapped the roof tops as the clouds wept when you disappeared into the horizon. You said the times we spent and the many words I spoke would forever be engraved in your memory. Do you remember?

Was it really raining that day? Were those words sincere? Was it the tears of the clouds weeping or our own that hit the ground when we severed ties? I don’t remember. Do you remember?

Thanks to the AMAZING RadicalEddy, I now have a title : D

Deji-chan 08-17-2007 06:26 PM

Dx That was really, really sad, but good. I loved the descriptions. They painted a beautiful picture of what seems to have been forgotten.

I have no ideas for titles, unfortunately. D:

InSaneWeTrust 08-23-2007 11:07 PM

Does anyone else have any comments/critiques/etc?

RadicalEddy 08-24-2007 05:59 AM

*is speechless* O__O
Omg I haven't read such a beautiful touching text for a long time.
Respect! Really this is awesome!
I hope this question is not too indiscrete, but would you tell me what inspired you? You don't have to answer if it's to personal. :3

Concerning a title: What about "Remembrance"? It's simple but in my opinion accurate. ^^

InSaneWeTrust 08-27-2007 01:23 AM

Thank you :3
My inspiration. Hmm, I really don't know what it was xD I was bored in physics class last year and I wrote it.

AND THAT TITLE IS PERFECT. I HAVE NO IDEA WHY I DIDN'T THINK OF IT! [/CAPS abuse]

RadicalEddy 08-27-2007 05:37 AM

You're welcome. ^^
I'm glad I could help you. (usually I have problems with finding titles myself xD)

Oh yeah boredom...a good inspiration. :3

Seito 08-27-2007 08:44 AM

Wow x3
that's a really pretty story. I love how you described everything. Beautiful.


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