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Here just not seen.
Chapter 1
Autumn looked out her window and the season that was her name the leaves were flying in a dizzying motion which made her head spin. Looking away from her window which made her headache go back to a non threatning state. She put on her black high tops with the hot pink laces and left them untied. She just left her room and shut the door as she was making her walk downstairs. She stepped on her right shoe lace and tumbled "Whoah!" Autumn yelped as she went down and everything went flying her books her phone and her long hair which was currently dark red. Once she was back on the ground and laying flat on her face she looked up and saw her mom. "Hi mom." Autumn said getting up and dusting herself off and then smiled happy she didn't break a bone. "You could have hurt yourself that explains it you didn't tie your shoes." Her mother said and pointed to her laces. Autumn looked down and completely forgot about her laces and went down to tie them. Once she was done she went to the coffee table in the living room grabbed her lunch money and left. "Bye mom." Autumn yelled as her thin hand reached for the cold brass doorknob. "Bye Autumn be careful." Her mom said and watched her daughter leave the house. Once Autumn was outside she smiled she walked to the bus stop and waited she looked up at the sky which was almost gray. Her dark blue eyes looked at her shoes to make sure they were still tied for her walk to her bus seat. Once the bus came she flattened her teared blue jeans and walked on. She looked around for an empty seat and saw her usual seat in the back was not filled by a stranger. She walked back and sat in her seat which had her name scribbled on it in her pink milky pen which was always in her bookbag for 'good luck' which never happened. The bus was off to the 2nd to last stop. Which was Cassidy's stop, you know the girl thats the head cheerleader and a total b**** yup thats Cassidy. Autumn just rolled her eyes and took out her blue iPod and listened to her music. As the bus started moving again Autumn felt as if she was being watched by someone she loooked up and saw Cassidy staring down at her with her peircing green eyes. "May I help you?" Autumn said confidently pulling out her right head phone., she has never been scared of Cassidy as far as she knew. She was just some b**** who thought she was the boss of everybody. "Yes you can thats my seat." Cassidy said and crossed her arms over her chest which had the schools mascot which was a dolphin. Autumn just rolled her eyes and put her right headphone back on. It was on a good 5 seconds until Cassidy yanked it out of her ear. "Ow!What was that for?" Autumn said and clenched her right ear which was probably turning red. "For not movinig this is my seat." Cassidy said and put her hands on her hips, Autumn stood up showing she was a good 3 inches taller then Cassidy. She looked down at her. "This is my seat I have my name on it right there." Autumn said and pointed to her name scribbled where she puts her bookbag. Beinig frustrated Cassidy pushed Autumn out of the way and sat in the seat beside hers. Autumn smirked and sat down she always got her way. Some b****y cheerleader wasn't going to boss her around either until she got a supprise smack in the back of the head. Good?Please leave comments and helpers not to harsh though. |
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From where I'm sitting, I don't like Autumn. Someone who "always gets their way" sounds like a brat to me. I'm hoping that she makes a new friend who puts some tenderness and consideration for others in her. Just generally, you ought to type out numbers as words. Don't worry about bleeping out swear words, as long as they're not excessive. It's called artistic license. Finally, try using commas more often. Keep it up, I am interested in the characters and what happens next. |
Thanks for helping. I like the things you put in I think it makes it more interesting chapter 2 will be coming soon.
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Chapter two! Now! xD
Interesting story. |
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