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SilverKnightHawk
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#1
Old 08-24-2009, 04:41 AM

I don't know if you would consider this a poem, I think of it more as a short song. Please tell me what you think I can do to improve it and what you like about it. :D

Midnight dawns
Life is pure,
Twilight calls
Yet again,
Night is falling
Rapidly,
Where am I
Where are you?

Last edited by SilverKnightHawk; 09-08-2009 at 10:16 PM..

Hayzel
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#2
Old 09-06-2009, 12:08 AM

Lyrics to songs are poetry. Nicely done for such a short bit. My only comment is that you should probably remain consistent with the comma placement. Well done.

SilverKnightHawk
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#3
Old 09-08-2009, 10:16 PM

Thanks, I'll do that =3

 


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