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what i should have done
What i should have done
I should have been a better daughter. I should have loved you more. I should have acted alot betterthere shouldn't have been a excuse. I should have treasured all the memories we shared togather. I should have been less lazy and maybe you would have stayed. But you are gone off this earth , I guess i can't change the past. So all i can do is remember you and the good times. Stephanie Elizabeth Major Copyright ©2007 Stephanie Elizabeth Major |
This is a personal poem. It’s also short. Spelling and grammar should be analyzed before you are ready to submit it. This is a part of your life, and keeping criticism to a minimum, because this is a personal piece, and a criticism to the piece is a criticism to you. That being said, you should change the following parts:
What I should I should have acted a lot better. There shouldn't have been an excuse. together earth, I Guess I All I can Also. You had two sentences together, with no punctuation in line 3. I don't really have a reference of what rhythm you attempted, and because this is a short piece, I can't figure it out enough to know how you wanted to separate it, so I suggested a hyphen. Spaces, breaks, and punctuation all affect how your poem is read. When you're tweaking this piece keep that in mind. |
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