"In the Name of God, My Heart"

In the Name of God, my heart,
conceal your passion.
Better to hide your complaint from those
who see you.

He who reveals secrets
is like the foolish man.
Silence and concealment
is better for him who loves.

In the Name of God, my heart, if someone
comes to ask, hide what befell me.

If they says, my heart,
"Who does he desire?"
Say, "She seduced another.
He does not care."

In the Name of God, my heart, veil your ardor.
You know this disease has made you weak.

Love among spirits
is like wine in a cup.
It appears to be water,
but in truth is life.

In the Name of God, my heart, lock up your cares.
You will be safe though seas rage and heavens fall.

If thou must love me, let it be for nought


If thou must love me, let it be for nought
Except for love's sake only. Do not say
"I love her for her smile her look her way
Of speaking gently, for a trick of thought
That falls in well with mine, and certes brought
A sense of ease on such a day"
For these things in themselves, Beloved, may
Be changed, or change for thee, and love, so wrought,
May be unwrought so. Neither love me for
Thine own dear pity's wiping my cheek dry,
A creature might forget to weep, who bore
Thy comfort long, and lose thy love thereby!
But love me for love's sake, that evermore
Thou may'st love on, through love's eternity.

To Flush, My Dog


Yet, my pretty sportive friend,
Little is't to such an end
That I praise thy rareness!
Other dogs may be thy peers
Haply in these drooping ears,
And this glossy fairness.

But of thee it shall be said,
This dog watched beside a bed
Day and night unweary
Watched within a curtained room,
Where no sunbeam brake the gloom
Round the sick and dreary.

Roses, gathered for a vase,
In that chamber died apace,
Beam and breeze resigning.
This dog only, waited on,
Knowing that when light is gone
Love remains for shining.

Other dogs in thymy dew
Tracked the hares, and followed through
Sunny moor or meadow.
This dog only, crept and crept
Next a languid cheek that slept,
Sharing in the shadow.

Other dogs of loyal cheer
Bounded at the whistle clear,
Up the woodside hieing.
This dog only, watched in reach
Of a faintly uttered speech,
Or a louder sighing.

And if one or two quick tears
Dropped upon his glossy ears,
Or a sigh came double
Up he sprang in eager haste,
Fawning, fondling, breathing fast,
In a tender trouble.

And this dog was satisfied
If a pale thin hand would glide
Down his dewlaps sloping
Which he pushed his nose within,
After—platforming his chin
On the palm left open.

To Flush, My Dog

Before I was myself you made me, me
With love and patience, discipline and tears,
Then bit by bit stepped back to set me free,

Allowing me to sail upon my sea,
Though well within the headlands of your fears.
Before I was myself you made me, me

With dreams enough of what I was to be
And hopes that would be sculpted by the years,
Then bit by bit stepped back to set me free,

Relinquishing your powers gradually
To let me shape myself among my peers.
Before I was myself you made me, me,

And being good and wise, you gracefully
As dancers when the last sweet cadence nears
Bit by bit stepped back to set me free.

For love inspires learning naturally:
The mind assents to what the heart reveres.
And so it was through love you made me, me
By slowly stepping back to set me free.

I love them both, can't have them both.
It's tearing me apart!
My former joy and present boy:
Both have got my heart.

I have to choose, so I must lose
Someone I really love.
It feels like dirt that I must hurt
A guy that I dream of.

Why this must be I cannot see;
I only know I must.
Each might endure, for I am sure
That this is love, not lust.

I weep and wail to no avail;
I can't say no to either.
But if I can't tell what I want,
Could that mean I want neither?

Out in the Wilderness

I sleep on the ground here
Of frosty cold stone.
My thoughts are with you dear,
Where I am at home.

Cold staring eyes
Of the stars in the night,
Gaze hard upon me.
It doesn't feel right.

I lie in this darkness
And tremble with fear.
Not due to the battle
But because you're not near.

Where are you now?
And what are you thinking?
I dare not imagine,
My heart is still sinking.

I want this war over.
That the terror be gone.
I was blissfully happy,
Before it came along.

And this is a strange land,
A crude distant place.
But it's not the adventure,
Or the danger I face.

Lonely cold nights
On a hard field-bed cot,
This is no pleasure,
It really is not.

I wish only again
That we would be near,
But you live in my heart,
You always are here.

And there's only one comfort
In this god-forsook place.
A picture of you,
With a smile on your face.

So please don't be sad
You are not alone.
I promise one thing;
That I will come home.

Because who could deny you
The thing that you miss.
A loving embrace
And a warm tender kiss.

It is surely not I,
Please don't get misgivings
The pleasure it lies
Just in the giving.

Thats all for now
I love you my dear.
I look to the future
When we will be near.

Please miss your plane.

I'm breaking glass
Inside my head.

If I bang my head
Hard enough
And long enough
Into the wall,

If I throw enough jars
Around my room
And crash them into
Shards and hell,

Would you make
This be a dream.
Wake me up.

And then I'll say
"I had a dream,
You had to go."

And let me curl
And hold you.
Warm, protecting, safe, and strong.
"I had a dream but I was wrong."

I Wish My Husband Were Online

I wish my husband were online
If he were here, I would be fine.
I wish he would turn on his phone.
I sit at night, I'm all alone.

I wish he would come home to me.
Its been a year, too long, you see.
I can not bear another day.
I wish he hadn't gone away.

And when I cry, he can't get mad,
Nor say I want him to feel bad.
Because he is so far away.
I wish he would come home and stay.

I wish that when I woke at night
And couldn't sleep, he'd hold me tight.
And kiss me on my eyes and face.
And crush my bones with his embrace.

And calm my heart. And laugh away,
The torments of these insane ways,
That follow me wher'er I go.
I miss him and I love him so.

My poem is a corny rhyme
Because I have not so much time.
My stomach lurches, my hands shake
I wish I was too hard to break.

I wish I was like him, so calm.
Even when these things go wrong.
Happy, strong, and carefree too.
I say, "One day, I'll be like you."

Which day that is, I cannot see.
I want to feel alive and free.
And never sleep again alone.
I wish my husband would come home.

My Story

Once there was a little pug,
She snapped and snarled at every thug.
She had a brain, the thugs had none,
For they were crass and crude and dumb.
But when they gathered with their clubs,
She ran away, that little pug.
She ducked for cover, panting hard
And peered out with a pounding heart.


And when her master wasn't near,
She shook and trembled with her fear.
Her master came and chased away
The stupid thugs. And every day,
She felt okay, if he was there.
And when he wasn't, she was scared.

One day the thugs were growing strong.
She had been good, she'd done no wrong;
Her master kept the thugs at bay
With one low growl, they ran away.
But that was when the phone call came.
He had to go. No one to blame.

The little pug, she shook and cried.
She said she wouldn't stay alive.
The thugs were there, at her front door.
She couldn't hold them anymore.
She knew that she would be alone.
She got some money for the phone.
She banged her head into the wall.
Her master said, "Well, you can call."
She shook and cried into the chair ...
It didn't get her anywhere.
She prayed to god it was a dream.
But God was busy, so it seemed.

And that was when, with breaking glass,
Something, somewhere, came to pass.
Someone, somehow, cast a spell.
Against the laughing mites of hell.
And through the night time, something changed,
As if the stars had re-arranged.
And as she slept, we don't know how,
Her little pout became a growl.

And when she woke she shook a bit ...
Okay ... she sobbed and had a fit.
But only when she was alone,
Hidden deep within her home.
But when she stepped out of her door,
She wasn't crying anymore.
She looked the thugs straight in the eye.
She said, "So fight me. Please just try."
I have had enough of it.
I care no more, oh not one bit."

She breathed in deep to swell her ribs.
She put her hands onto her hips.
She stood on tip-toe when she spoke,
To not look up on taller folk.


She told the thugs to go to hell.
She told them she was doing well.
She grabbed her kids, said "lets go play.
Let's fight these creeps some other day."

Now many stories could be told,
Of how that puppy grew so bold,
Some stories haven't happened yet
The war's not over, don't forget.
Our pug has yet to grow full-strong ...
But ... wait a minute, that was wrong.
The little pug has no more time
To waste her lifetime with this slime.
Our pug is pretty, cute and smart.
She won a merit for her art.
She did what no one else has done;
Went round the world when she was young.


She crossed alone the stony steppes,
When she was sick and nearly dead.
She can write and learn, and knows
She makes things better where she goes.
Her education rivals all.
These pugs are stupid, new, and small.
They bat their eyes with pimpled cheeks.
They spread their lies because they're week.

Our pug has yet one crime alone.
She turned her real self into stone.
For she is not a pug at all.
She is a wolf who acts so small.

Now there's our story, that was how
The yipping yap became a growl.
The little pug has far to go.
But now she sees and now she knows.

While witches laughed upon their thrones,
The Lion breathed upon the stone.

The story hasn't ended here.
The ending isn't even near.
This is the beginning now.
It will be turned around some how.
And many battles will be fought
But one day it will be forgot.
One day the wolf will calmly lie,
And glare at anyone who tries.
And one low growl will make them run.
And that will be a lot of fun.

But this is how it all began.
The pug who always ran and ran.
She turned around and smiled and said,
"I am myself, and don't forget.
Now go away and let me be.
Because I want to have some tea.
And - oh, yeah, one thing, by the way,
Don't come again until I say ..."

Now that's my story, that was how,
The little yelp became a growl.

The world was black, but on that day,
Our pug became a beast of prey.

Saying what I'm now about to say
Is like standing poised upon a cliff.
It seems like just an ordinary day,
But my future is suspended on an if.
To me you're an extraordinary friend:
You've transformed who I am, my being's core.
I would not for my life want this to end,
But now I want to ask for something more.
I love you, and I hope that you love me;
But if you don't that way, please don't go.
Although I want to love you physically,
Your wishes will command me, once I know.
I must speak now, whatever you may do;
I do not want to lose a gift like you.

Some people think that friends should be just friends;
To try for more might ruin what they have.
I think the closest friend is one you love,
Sharing life with words and lips and hands.

One caress unravels mysteries
Lodged behind the most elaborate mask.
The revelation's more than worth the risk.
I want with you such sweet simplicities.

I want us to be friends who now are free
To speak with all the languages of touch.
I want to share your anguish with a kiss
And feel your happiness against my cheek.

Sometimes people grow together slowly,
As trees reach across an old stone wall,
Entangling roots and crossing slender branches
Till one can barely tell which comes from which.

You've become part of my life slowly,
As music, often played, lives in the heart,
Shaping its surroundings to its beauty,
Mirroring the sanctum of its source.

I've come to this realization slowly,
As a deer stands at a clearing, nostrils wide,
Quivers rippling down its delicate legs,
Eyes resigned as lakes await the wind.

Say, my friend, what you must tell me slowly,
Whether my love is also yours, as the sun
Rises or sets over a tranquil valley,
Filling the heart with more than it can hold.

Do you want me? What's the matter?
You're afraid some door will close?
You want the scent without the rose?
The moans of love without the chatter?

You think our love might be a tomb,
The only exit through my pain?
You'd rather put things off again
To give your fantasies some room?

You think: she's great, but in a while
I might get bored? Or something better,
Filling out a tighter sweater,
Might flash me a quick come-on smile?

You don't want to be tied just yet
To just one future, just one kiss?
You think about all you might miss
And hold out for a better bet?

Well, fine! But then why do you haunt
Me like a jackal night and day?
Why, when my interest seems to stray,
Are you so sure of what you want?

Why, when I dare so much as laugh
At some guy's jokes, you go ballistic,
Nasty, borderline sadistic,
As if somebody touched your stuff?

And yet when I hook on to you,
You will not let yourself be mine,
Take out your fears and draw a line
Between what you and I can do?

But freedom must be mutual,
And it takes two for one embrace.
You can't both love and freedom chase,
Unless you would adore a fool.

Exactly when did love come to your hearts,
Vesting something one in something twain,
Exchanging simple wholes for complex parts,
Less purely self, more vulnerable to pain?
Yet passion often migrates into need,
Not needing much to crave unfeigned affection;
And so each craving does the other feed,
Need serving need as bond against rejection.
Doubt not such sweet sense can be sustained,
Not by passion, but by will and grace.
In long-lived love there's too much to be gained,
Convectively, to easy unembrace.
Oceans well up richly well within,
Letting go the air that we begin
Avidly to breathe, with passion burning,
So fraught with love no years can hold our yearning.

It's as if we were riding in a sealed railroad car.
Life passes by unseen.
Then someone throws open the door.
In the fierce sunlight we sense joy
But cannot clearly see.
How beautiful! we murmur, weeping,
Our tears like music.
Why haven't we known this all along?
In an open field we dance
Under sun and moon and stars all together.
You press my hand. You say:
I can't believe it!
I can't believe life has always been so lovely!
I tell you, my darling,
I tell you now, yes!
Yes, it is, my darling,
Yes. It is.

Jim has blue eyes flecked with gold;
Dark-haired handsome, rock-like good.
Marriage hid him, as it should,
Until his love ran cold.

He lived only down the street.
I was married, so was he.
But when divorces left us free,
We found the chance to meet.

Now we're both far happier
Than either ever was before.
Through suffering we found the door
That opened to each other.

We'll always feel, of course, the pain.
Divorce cannot but make one bleed.
But in that pain there lay a seed
That soon would bloom again.

Jim has blue eyes flecked with gold;
Dark-haired handsome, rock-like good.
Marriage hid him, as it should,
Until his love ran cold.

He lived only down the street.
I was married, so was he.
But when divorces left us free,
We found the chance to meet.

Now we're both far happier
Than either ever was before.
Through suffering we found the door
That opened to each other.

We'll always feel, of course, the pain.
Divorce cannot but make one bleed.
But in that pain there lay a seed
That soon would bloom again.

My love for you is something I'm afraid of.
You're all grown up, and I am still a kid.
You tell me that you love me. I believe it.
But something in me says this isn't good.

You touch me and I melt into your yearning.
You kiss me and I never want to stop.
I dream of you whenever I'm not with you.
And yet I cannot trust you - not just yet.

Yes, love and trust must always go together,
And it's a sign of trouble when they don't.
You are a man, and I not yet a woman,
Too young to know exactly what I want.

You say you'll wait for me, which makes me happy,
As I, too, wait for me to find my way.
Years are sunlit space for me to grow in
Until we can love boldly, eye-to-eye.

There's a certain joy that enters me,
However agitated my surreal day.
It comes like wind-blown silk, voluptuously,
Near turning me to itself. My feelings sway,
Knots untangle, the breeze takes me away!
In moments I'm disengaged, fluttering free,
Nodding yes within, without, all play,
Going where I need do none but be.

Or calm, like the stillness of green water,
Falls gently, inundates my inner cry;

Yearning quiets, I become the daughter
Of all that undertakes to soothe a sigh:
Use letters left then down to find out why.

When we first met you seemed a timid doe.
I hardly noticed you, nor did you me.
Now you are a mother and my wife,
And I find it a miracle to be.

You are for me a fresh, eternal springtime,
Or like an open window after rain,
A breath of air that says something of heaven,
And tells me of life's beauty once again.

I don't tell you enough how much I love you,
But if I did, I would say nothing else.
Each moment I am with you, there is sunlight
Slanting through the prism of my self.

Despite the doubts and troubles that you've gone through,
There is no doubt at all about your love.
Though many now change partners when they want to,
You've found your one and chosen not to move.
In doing so, you've given me a picture
More beautiful than any I might draw,
More potent than the most persuasive lecture,
With far more force than any rule or law.
So much you've given me! Yet what you've given
Of love and time and money and concern
Is less than what I've seen as you have striven
To make your lives a lesson I might learn.
I'm grateful for the things you did and do,
But even more, for what you made of you.

Elisha and Timmy have been five years together.
Love came to them young, and still it stays.
In their hearts they feel that it's forever,
Sweet love walking with them all their days.
However much life crashes hard around them,
All they have to do is turn within.
A gentle peace, serene and clear, surrounds them,
Nor need they strive some stranger's eye to win.
Despite this joy, they know there's some rough sailing
To come between reality and dream.
In choosing young, they've laid some grounds for failing:
More doubt and wonder than it first might seem.
May their love take them through these shoals of night.
Years on years will prove young love was right.

Every sky's a brand new sky,
Uncanny once again;
And every kiss, a brand new kiss,
New won, no matter when.

And every love, a brand new love,
New cherished every day;
Though lips and heart may slowly age,
The awe-struck boy will stay.

And I will vow again to love
You each day of my life,
As though each morning were the first
We rose as man and wife.

Just as a meadow washed by rain
Is relit by the dawn,
Just so our love, as we grow old,
Will each day be reborn.

However sweet the air or green the sea,
At times I shut myself within my room:
Perhaps I've failed to pierce the dream of me;
Perhaps I've let my mind become my tomb.
Yet when Creation hangs upon my breath,
Apocalypse advances with my age:
No happiness can compensate for death
Nor pleasure overwhelm my bitter rage.
In my love for you there is a field of flowers
Vaster than all the galaxies of night;
Each moment holds a sea of restless hours,
Replacing time with hills of laughing light.
So may we long be given this sweet grace
And love the child within the aging face;
Render the world upon the scrim of mind,
Yet glimpse through love the mystery behind.