To think that I am simply a criminal,
Yet your graciousness still loves me so.
Is the greatest sign of your mercy,
I just wanted you father to know.

I have never been loved so completely,
Nor been touched in the ways that you touch.
For your sweet holy spirit has filled me,
With a longing I needed so much.

Your has power filtered right through me,
Pierced every single bone, every cell.
And thanks to dear Jesus my savior,
I shall never experience true hell.

Your blessings continually find me,
Envelop me in rays of your love.
I thank you sweet Jesus for knowledge,
And the message received from above.




I know it sort of sucks...But -Shrugs- Tell me what you think, just try not to be to brutal.

not too bad. I've seen much worse, but I've seen better tho.

one of the big things that needs to be worked on are syllable patterns, unless you're going for a free flow lack of syllable patterns really can negatively affect quality. you don't even have to go with the more common syllable patterns, just work out your own as you write it. it makes it look a little less rough and a little more polished.

I also have to admit it sounds a little cliched. spiritual poetry has been done to death over the centuries so unless you can do something on par with, say, 'The Dark Night of the Soul' by Saint John of the Cross the subject can easily come off as a bit banal.

-Nods- Yea. Thanks for commenting. And I shall keep that all in mind when I go back to fix this one ^^

I really like your poem and your wings on your head. How'd you get those?!

Someone donated them to me...And thanks^^

I like that a lot.
Very nice, with a good message.
Good Job! :D