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affection it is dangerous a constant pressure a place of null of void it takes the others away it is sad but if logic can over run then it is fine but it is broken melted by a acid so the affection rushes like water can one build the wall back to contain it while it flows still can one contain it? |
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why do you find it in me why msut you blame me it is the bitterness showing my bitterness I want him my muse or the other muse the two who are they are pretty but it is tempting but logic holds me back then when one interferes I want to get annoyed and now you watch as I get worked up it is the same subject as always and it is stupid for you never remember every time every time I am worked up about it and now you think it is me you don't remember not my fault and the other is an issue hence why I am alone alone in the darkness to just deal with it all till I can create something of a wall for the guardian's armor is shattered her weapon broken and lonely never to win again so don't blame me when I am almost dead |
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the red light it shows up I ignore you like I always have why did I leave when I could use you for it is what happened I don't want an old toy I want something precious but I do admit to it all and I can't wait to watch as I break again so soon after everything so what is the point of the barrier if we all don't care it just hurts the morals so them now it doesn't matter and let me just wallow here running. |
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what am i thinking I am insane I know I know full well a full armored guardian can't fall in love with the broken one the one who is shattered and knows better it is then that I understand that I should be in more control drinking is bad and in this case worse we don't care but it hurts it hurts like a pain in my side like a silver stake so I let the shattered armor stay there knowing I can do nothing for my muse although friendly I can't fall for or so I believe |
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if only you didn't think of consequence if I was only a realistic person then I would learn better and then I would have rushed out knowing I can't knowing you knowing me it would be interesting I am willing to give it a try but how to tell you without you thinking i only think of you that way but in this state is it smart I won't break your line it is something I probably won't go near but in the end are you over it all are my muses here with me or standing next to someone no longer caring for me no longer pleasing me or anyone so I curl up no longer a muse myself but a fallen one failing at every step i take |
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I feel like death death as it engulfs me I see nothing see the darkness around me not sure if I should embrace it or let it go but I will never know for I am just there standing and falling when I step like tripping over and over again but it is then that I see what now for there is something I want should i really try this all again or will it never leave my system ever again like the berries did and I proved to a muse that I was awake and that I could be a flirt if I could take it all back would I even give him a second glance? |
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huge mess that is what I am a mess of events of emotions of carbon or oxygen emotions are dreading I half don't want them I want them in a thick bottle to hide them all away that is what I want a mess in a bottle the mess i am the tears I cry are in there the blood I spill in there the torn pieces of my soul make the bottle shimmer a glistening garnet hoping to never be broken |
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the locked door the click the entering it isn't to not let one out but to keep people away away from my love away from me and my pieces so I may not be trumped on more for I am breaking each and every day the winter sky proving me wrong day in and day out it is then that i want to curl up and die it is now that it is the worst that drinking got rid of it all but the fall I understand why we all want it back should i have some or avoid I told to come but what if I don't I want nothing now no love no emotions don't come in to the puddle or garnet and carbon that was once me |
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three days and I feel great that is a lie I am bitter stung by everything stung and wishing someone was there to watch pride and prejudice with me but it is in these hands that i see that I understand I am a widow and always will be I won't accept anyone lower but strive for higher but no one wants me so I sit here not understanding when people say nothing to me I want what is taken and in that choice that I choose this lonely path I hold my one love letter but won't read for it is nothing of importance to me now the innocence lost in my mentality logic set in that is impossible and he lost the door for all eternity |
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in nothing left that i find more void the void in my heart in my soul in everything I chose to not respond till I am stable but I never left it all just a odd feeling when nothing comes anymore I wanted to run i wanted someone there to hold me I wanted someone there to tease but I will never have hat for he won't ask I will only hint and when it all boils down to it I will lose my mind from the lack of it all lack of anything lack of self lack of non self it is there that I find nothing no comfort nothing but the ends of my despair |
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I'm waiting so lonely I will be there to take the hand when you are gone and I don't remember will you still reach out to the stranger in me the one no one ever knew the one who will lose themselves to me and watch as i cry though the days but it is funny the muse awoke me his key like the others will never understand that they are there that piece it makes me smile that I will will never understand so now what happens when I return and go away never to be seen again and awaken someone else will you still see me or will I never be yours again with the key |
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awaken to the sad state I am in and notice that you should help I ask you to be what you aren't but please for me be that or at least see me want to pamper you and every time be there for me for i will never again be this way in a few weeks nothing will phase me and i will drop off into oblivion |
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It is my way of life i must admit, I live for those who see me, and will die if I lack them. Quote:
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for those who sing I love them all dearly it is amazing she would have fun if it happened it is embarrassing but it is good it is a pretty rose and I want one but I want nothing but a single rose rose of black of death so I would love the ends of the earth not the living as one would hope but live knowing it was good and die knowing I was loved what happens if one died on this day |
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for the drinking we are worried what happens now when we realize it is too soon and this is the wrong time and the wrong mentality and now everything goes away you could care less and you never knew and now I want it want the plop feeling the sitting in someone's lap and never moving and keeping them for all eternity |
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reread it all all them flowing back like a rushing wave that you have once heard and now waiting to hear again but in the end it overwhelms flowing you back to see with the tide and do you take out paper and pencil and continue writing drawing being a muse singing as you are drowning making for start to float but in the end you are high above if you do it enough above them all flying and now where did the tide go the tide of emotions |
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through it all do I have enough is there ever enough to finish it all do I have more or less she types better than me can do more gold than me so what to do when I own more than her it is silly I spend time here knowing nothing so what now when my story is weird at a authors block but I still write with pen in hand continuing for all of time |
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how to hide a secret do we just hold it near or do we hide it wanting to bury it under thousands of lies or is it just stupidity that we all are here with these secrets that are obviously findable I am there knowing nothing but to keep it all online it is the case never ending we love you all dearly but it is a case that we should all run to our daily lives holding those near us dear and knowing we aren't the only ones and nothing else |
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it is here that i find that i am alone not really but figuratively alone in the darkness of my closet soul the one who loves but has chosen to give the key away to my soul for the bottle that sits holding my broken mess wanting to rebuild it all but feels like it can't that is where I am in a darkness beyond to where I am but a faceless person no gender nothing |
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biites when provoked biitter love biites kiitty these are all true it is sad but true we want them all but we can't do anything so should we eat or just sit and watch as all that happens all provoked ends in violence for us all |
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do you not appreciate it I guessed you wouldn't but it is insane I don't understand I know all who appreciate it you seem ignorant or uncaring do you not understand what live means what socializing is but it is sad I love it all the muses you seem to under appreciate it all and don't understand that you disappoint me please don't see it you aren't like us you seem like you don't understand it all we love the arts so please let us have the muses |
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the muses they need to be better it is it just me they seems to be silly she doesn't understand she isn't good there is no blowing away there is nothing you listen to my friends the muses of new you can hear it but understand little you say you hear pitch but do you it is silly I hear when he messed up but it is love that draws me to that song and now love to him so please if you don't like it don't try and be there |
21. classical music
it reminds me within minutes I know the song it takes nothing i know it, I grow up with it so please understand when I stare at music and understand it all yes theory is good but I do understand you play it in orchestra you know it you remember it all and then when it hits your ears I know it all so then is it good... |
50. locked door
the click as it moves to the left it seals permanent to keep everything in to keep everything out both them and to keep my emotions in should one approach with a key I will be in there crying picking up the pieces of a shattered ball trying to piece each together like a puzzle but with tears flowing the puzzle on a small raft on the river the lake of tears the pieces as they constantly fall into the emotions hurting them more Can you hear me behind the door or the water as it rushes through The sobbing the pains the screams as each piece falls through the raft and into my emotions hurting me more the raft made of blood spilled created into a small raft the blood keeping me safe from sinking for all eternity do you hear anything or only the silence beyond the door but can you open it do you have a key and do you want to open it letting me flow out but along with the lake and the blood do you have they key or do you stand on the other side oblivious to the river on the other side of hte locked door |
75. thin line of control
this thin line can be broken with acid with a key do you do so or keep it there or do you wish you could draw more make it thicker do you wish to step across to see me in the disarray I am in can you see me standing on the other side knowing what happens at all times can you see me? standing there watching your every move warning you do you see me crying on the other side with tears around me blood splattered on the floor on the furniture what little there is the small amount the the area, all alone do you see me watching you as you look at the line I warn you each of you take it differently I can try and stop you for those who try and make it bigger the only one who wants it there i gave you an opening i showed it to you but you walk not across it are you scared as to what disfigurement you will see on the other side Do you understand I don't give the opening to anyone that i half want you to step across and see me see the weakness the strength inside me or does it all scare you all emotions do you see me close to you or will you stand staring at the line as most have and the few that have tried to cross never live again the line just becomes thinner as you stay there the acid made it so do you draw on it or will you ignore it all and hide back with you not crossing but knowing that you had a chance? |
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