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(This is a rant of sorts, kind of turned into something that resembles a spoken word poem. If this is in the wrong spot, some admin please move it.)

I'm tired.
I'm tired of looking for work, finding it, and it not lasting.
I'm tired of looking for love, finding it, and it not lasting.
I'm tired of waiting for love, and waiting, and waiting, and wondering if I'm waiting because it's worth it or waiting because that's the only thing I know how to do.
I'm tired of loyalty to something that doesn't serve it's purpose, I'm tired of putting myself to the side for others, or for "something better in the long term".
I'm tired of going in circles, getting somewhere, and then ending back at square one.
I'm tired of being dependent on everyone and everything, and not quite being myself just so I can please those who are still over me.
I'm tired of pretending to be alright just so that everyone around me doesn't feel like they have to awkwardly support me again while I go through some kind of depression dive.
I'm tired of bouncing between not giving a shit and giving all the shits.
I'm tired of living life like I care.
Because today I just don't.

AmyHeartXVIII: that was great! Very raw and passionate