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Nephila 10-29-2017 03:34 AM

>.< merr
 
Post for things.

When we can trade again my inventory will be divided between everyone that posts in the thread.

1. hummy
2. dragoness129
3. Shadami
4. Dystopia
5. monstahh`
6. star2000shadow
7. Mikio
8. Maria-Minamino
9. *Hime*
10. xoxoAngiexoxo
11. Ikuto Akihiko Hasegawa
12. sadrain
13. salvete
14. Xogizmoox
15. zigbigadorlube
16. Miscreant74
17. Kat Dakuu

ect.


Post on page something:
Quote:

Mene is like the mafia.

You want to put a hit on the boss (not anyone in particular, just the site personified) and leave forever to start a new life. But when you think you're free and are about to make a break for the hills they suck you back in with feelings. [illgetu]

How does one leave the only life they've ever known. I've been feeling ok today and hanging out in the hangout thread. Trying to post and focus on good things but I'm finding it dificult.

However, I think I do need to seriously seek some council. And not just because of Menewsha being "stressful" for me. My self destructive side has been very busy this week across the board. I haven't physically self harmed in a long time, and I still haven't, so that's a plus. But I came really close Sunday night.

What I've been doing is a different kind of self harm. I've been trying to further isolate myself and I don't know what brought this current bout on. I realized a long time ago that I'm a toxic person and I've been trying to get better and change. I've had mostly good days for a long time. This week though...well last week.
  • I booted out my bf twice this weekend. (Why this man comes back every time I do this I'll never know)
  • I unfriended almost all the people I've meet through conventions in my life on FB. (WTF cold)
  • I went full feminist in one of my bewbie groups. (even bigger wtf as I draw for that audience.)
  • And of course this gem of a thread. (-.- sigh)

I'm not a physiologist but I think I have a problem.

I feel like I'm constantly under attack from everyone, even if I can see it's not true in most cases. I feel like I need to be defensive about everything or attack first. I feel like nothing I do really matters or makes a difference to anyone. I don't know what to do with myself.

I apologize for putting everyone though my crazy. I'm still pensive about staying, but I can see what you guys are saying about my stuff. I guess I'll keep it.

Hell I still have the rest of the female commons to go after. I should at least conquer my goals before giving up. XD

~


hummy 10-29-2017 03:39 AM


please do not do it!

dragoness129 10-29-2017 03:40 AM

Aww -hugs Neph-

Shadami 10-29-2017 04:24 AM

Oh Nephi. :/ *hugs*

Dystopia 10-29-2017 05:39 AM

:U Let's not be hasty! You spent a lot of time building up your inventory. I know you're feeling hella done with this place and its shit, but maybe you might feel differently experiencing it as a user rather than a staffer. I was offered a post a long time ago, but I turned it down exactly because I knew I'd come to hate it.

monstahh` 10-29-2017 09:37 AM

Wait, whats going on? D:
Did I miss something?

star2000shadow 10-29-2017 09:39 AM

Wait.. Neph.. your not leaving areyou..

Mikio 10-29-2017 12:54 PM

What, why? :c what happened?

Maria-Minamino 10-29-2017 01:25 PM

Aw Neph :(

*Hime* 10-29-2017 02:13 PM

Nephila, are you leaving us for good? It can't be true D::
I'm not sure what happened or is happening, but I hope you are alright...;_;

xoxoAngiexoxo 10-29-2017 02:19 PM

Neph take a break if you need to but don't leave permanently. Don't rush into giving away your inventory take a break then see how you feel.

Ikuto Akihiko Hasegawa 10-29-2017 02:20 PM

Do what you feel is beeest. [hug]
Don't include me in the giveaway~ [ninja]

sadrain 10-29-2017 02:27 PM

Nephi, whachu up to. You're not quitting, right. /paranoid

Maria-Minamino 10-29-2017 02:33 PM

♡♡♡ could always just join the user side of things instead of staff. It's less stresssssss :P

Shadami 10-29-2017 02:34 PM

We love you Nephi .

salvete 10-29-2017 04:12 PM

I sincerely hope this is not what I think it means...please don't go :( We love you Nephila :( I'm sorry for any and all the dumb things I did and everyone else did and might have done. I can't help but feel bad that such a kind, patient, beautiful person is considering this. Dystopia and Maria seem to have good insight since they have had the experience of turning down a staff position or leaving a staff position to be a regular user. I also agree with Angie. I myself have considered quitting menewsha in the past, but instead I take hiatuses every now and then. I don't know if that's as possible for a staff member to do but certainly is for a regular user. I don't know if you're considering this but I'm just agreeing with what has been said already by the people above who love and care about you <3

Xogizmoox 10-29-2017 04:13 PM

No my Neph can't leave me :(

zigbigadorlube 10-29-2017 06:55 PM

I know things have been super stressful for you Neph. We all know you work super hard and I wouldn't want to see you give away everything you've worked so hard questing on! Wouldn't it be better to go on a hiatus and see how you feel afterwards before giving everything away? You know I'm here if you want to talk about it. Feel free to send me a message anytime. [hug]

hummy 10-29-2017 06:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zigbigadorlube (Post 1773988280)
I know things have been super stressful for you Neph. We all know you work super hard and I wouldn't want to see you give away everything you've worked so hard questing on! Wouldn't it be better to go on a hiatus and see how you feel afterwards before giving everything away? You know I'm here if you want to talk about it. Feel free to send me a message anytime. [hug]


I totally agree. just think of all of the organizing!
just think of all the friends who truly love you.

xoxoAngiexoxo 10-29-2017 06:58 PM

I agree with zig totally

Miscreant74 10-29-2017 08:17 PM

Just take a break.
you will probably feel better after some time away
I take breaks from sites on a regular basis

dragoness129 10-29-2017 08:26 PM

I take a lot of breaks from sites myself.
And I like popping in from site to site.
Part of why I have never applied to any staff positions.

*Hime* 10-29-2017 08:31 PM

People are allowed to have breaks. I am currently taking one from life.
Hope Neph comes to chat with us a bit.;

Kat Dakuu 10-29-2017 09:00 PM

Aw, please don't tell me Neph is leaving. We don't talk that much, but I'd still be sad to see you go. At least leave it so you can pop back in later. You might regret it.

hummy 10-29-2017 09:03 PM


I am totally worried. last time I saw Nephie like this she left k.
and then k basically pooffed out of existence.


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