|
But I tried my hardest!
So I just got back from one of my fitness testing for basketball and I didn't do very well on the running parts because I've bruised and stretched my achilles. My basketball shoes ended up digging into the exact spot and I couldn't do what I should've been able to do. After I was done I got into my car with my dad and he told me how I did really bad and told me that I better not be making up my injury and such. I felt frustrated with myself because he was disappointed in me, but all I could think of was that I tried my hardest with my injury.
How do you deal with disappointment? Which do you think is worse: you being disappointed in yourself or someone you love being disappointed in you? Why? |
If your father can't understand that you were hurt or can't believe you then Fuck him.
If you tried your best and it didn't quite go the way you wanted then oh well. If your disappointed then try harder, try to avoid being hurt next time for something like a fitness test. If Your family is disappointed then ask them if they could do better, You clearly don't need shit from them if your beating yourself up over it. |
I suppose....
|
I don't do too good with disappointment. I tend to take it out on people around me. As if it was their fault I failed. Which is why I try not to fail too often. I mean if you're in pain, there's nothing you can do.
I would have told my father off, but that's me, and I'm kind of an angry little person and my family knows it. I don't have a problem telling people to bug off. I think it hurts more to have someone be disappointed in me. My mom was once, and it hurt, but I made it all better... ^-^ |
When somebody is being dissapointed in me, because I have let them down. D; Like one time when my dad asked if he could take the big order when he closed on that day and I said no, so he already canceled and then after a while I felt really bad for saying no, and next time I should let them take it >___< |
When I'm disappointed, I just use that as motivation to do better.
It doesn't bother me at all when any of my family is disappointed in me; they're disappointed in me whether I succeed or fail. ^^ So, being disappointed in myself is definately worse. |
I use my own feelings of disappointment, those of my family and other people, to strive for something good, so that i can say: 'Ha, look at me now' when i get there in the end.
And no matter how long something takes me, i'll get there. So i guess you could say, i use disappointment as a catalyst to do better. |
I think if you try your hardest, that is all that matters.
I've never really cared if my mother was disappointed in me, because her opinion doesn't matter to me. But if my father was ever disappointed in me... I would break down. Me and my dad have been through a lot of hard times together, so I have more respect for him. He is the reason I want to be successful. He told me a story of how one of his friend's sons was really successful and how proud his friend was. I told my dad I would do whatever it took to make him proud of me. I feel he still doesn't really appreciate me... I'm going to do everything I can to make him proud, because a disappointment from him really tears me down. If I can't make him proud, I'm not doing good enough. |
Quote:
as for your dad i don't realy now what your realation ship is with him. but i can tell if either of my paretns tell me there disappointed in me its gets to me. so i get if your dad tell you that *in my 21 years the each only ones told there where dissaponted in me. but not over something like this i don't think your dad was dissapointed in you as in you you. in his on way i guss he was feeling the same ass you. frustrate cs it was not working even if your working so haad at it or he's just plain mean *i'm not leaving out cos i don't now him that well |
My family was disappointed in me no matter what I did.
Know what I did? I stopped caring what they thought. If you try your hardest that's all that matters. I was a straight A student. I did good in nearly everything, but I wasn't happy with that because the only reason I was doing it, was for someone else. And the someone else still wasn't happy with even that. So now I tell them to get bent. |
When someone is disappointed in me, I tend to completely overreact and assume that I am just a horrible person and I can't do anything right.
Ahh, the perks of disastrously low self esteem. |
I think it is terrible when parents push their kids like that and think they are making it up... epically when it comes to sports. That is just insane. My father always did stuff like that and it did not have to be about sports. Not sure why I guess he just did not have any compassion. My mom she did but she did not like for us to quit an sport we started. I always said I would not push my kids. I have one and she is to young for them currently but when she gets older I will not be pushing her.
I always felt bad too when it would happen I would feel like what ever I did was not good enough. I would get straight As and it would be nothing compaired to my sister getting straight Fs and one D they would give her money for a D. When I would question it they would say they expected it of me because they knew I could do better. I think that was so silly and said I would never do my children that way. |
I get disappointing in myself a lot. I once asked my dad to rate my artwork and he said 5 out of ten when my friends said 10. So the reason why my dad rated a five for me is becuase he randomly chose a number. :sweat:
|
I think it's worse if someone you love, or just anyone really is disappointed in you over being disappointed in yourself, although that doesn't feel too good either. But usually, when I'm disappointed or someone else is disappointed in me, I tend to just lock myself up in my room, or any room and just try to distract myself by doing other things. Usually going on the computer reading, or going on sites, or listening to music.
|
It doesn't matter what your father thinks as much as it matters what you think. It was your responsibility to do the best that you could. If you think you did, then that is all that matters. The fact that your dad put you down hopefully just means that he was really sure you were going to make it and was disappointed that you didn't. Dads usually don't know the best way to express that.
Give it some time and I'm sure you'll both see that it isn't that big of a deal. You didn't make it sure, but you were injured and did your best. Just try again next time. |
My mom was like that she always thought I was faking injuries or illnesses. I don't take well to disappointment. I got a lot of it growing up, grades never high enough or not doing something the right way. But it's always much worse when I am disappointed in myself. When other people are as long as I know I did my best I can ignore it, but when I get disappointed in myself I really can't justify why I did so badly and beat myself up over it.
|
When I lose games I cheer. I'm serious. I don't mind losing. although, the one time I do mind, I blame me, not someone else.
|
Ugh, I don't really like to have anything disappointing happened to me cause a lot of the time that just stresses me out horribly in almost any situation of disappointment.
|
How do you deal with disappointment? I just move on.
Which do you think is worse: you being disappointed in yourself or someone you love being disappointed in you? I don't know. |
your father of all people should be more understanding then that <.< so firstly i'd like to say if he's not supportive and instead chooses to be a jerk (for lack of the ability to use the word i'm actually thinking for him) then ignore him. don't worry about his disappointment. worry about you yourself and no one else. you were injured, yet you still went you still did your best and for that i say bravo. worry not except about healing. for the disappointment. ignore it. it's not yours to deal with someone else being negative simply because the dont grasp and understand what you are currently going through. so long as your aware you did the best you could be proud that even injured you were at least willing to try.
|
I never knew my parents were proud of me until I moved out. As such if they disapprove of me I really don't care, it's not like I ever really got approval for anything anyway. However if I disappointed myself it's terrible. Because I know what I'm capable of.
|
How do you deal with disappointment? i just there and think about whether i really tried my hardest or not, and that many people get it worse...
Which do you think is worse: you being disappointed in yourself or someone you love being disappointed in you? Why? me being disappointed in myself. i dont know why |
It sounds like your dad is way too dependent and harsh on you when it comes to sports. When I was in softball yeah my dad wanted me to be good and to win a lot but when I got hurt he never pushed the issue. There's only so much a person can do when they're injured. And trying to force the person into doing better only makes the situation worse so please don't be disappointed in yourself because it's not your fault and by doing your best you've more than proven yourself. All you can do is wait for the injury to heal and be pumped up to give it another go. As long as you love what you're doing that's all that matters.
As for the questions I deal with disappointment in telling myself I gave it my best shot and I can always come back and do it better. And I think it does hurt more for someone you love to be disappointed in you because you're not entirely sure what they're thinking but know it isn't good. If it was myself I could overcome my self loathing. |
I hate how parents pull that crap.
My father always gave me those lines. I sprained both ankles, and tore a muscle in my back when I was younger. My father honestly believed I was making these injuries up, so a doctor's trip was not allowed. I remember being in school and trying to pretend that everything was fine and that I wasn't hurt at all. I thought I was doing pretty well, but I had a limp that everyone kept questioning. I think it's easier when you're disappointed in yourself. It's a reflection on yourself, and you can always improve. Unfortunately, another person may never be satisfied. |
Well, shouldn't your dad be proud that you tried in the first place..?
|
| All times are GMT. The time now is 01:43 PM. |