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Pain
Pain.
The essence of life. It's all I need to know that I'm alive. It's every colour And every sound Every taste And every feeling. Every emotion And every thought. It's all I need And all I want. It's eternal Neverending Reliable Constant. Everything I need To know I'm alive is Pain. Something I wrote out of boredom a couple of weeks ago. Click here to see the formatting with the spaces I added it. Damn Menewsha forums ate my formatting =( |
I love how this poem flows, it's like a verbal stream. The only thing I'd say to alter is perhaps the third verse..."It's eternal", etc. That verse seems different in flow than the rest of your poem...the rest of your lines have about three to five syllables, while this verse has three or less. Otherwise it's a really nice poem that gets a lot said in very few words. :]
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