Age Difference
 

In dating. Right now in the relationship i'm in My bf is 10 years older then I am. Some people would freak and say that's to much of an age difference, other say age is nothing but a number its the maturity of the two people and how well they get along. well, what is your point of your view on age differences in relationships, should they only be limited to a few years or do they not matter?

It depends on your ages specifically.
If you're 13 and he's 23, that is... kind of on the edge of illegal, especially if you chose to participate in sexual intercourse.
But if you're a legal adult, and they are a legal adult, I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Just remember the generation gap. Those gaps can really cause a relationship to fall because of different opinions and what not.

i'm 17 which is legal in NY state and he's 27

I think age to a certain point doesn't matter. Say your like me in high school dating guys three years older, it tends to be a problem. (especially with my parents)
But, if your an adult and your dating I don't see what a few years could hurt. I mean, personally, I don't really care about age that much. It's about who the person is, the connection I have with him/her and if they really mean something to me. So if you really like/love this dude, who is to tell you not to date him? You only find love once in this world, most of us never find true love at all, so find it where you can and be happy. (screw other people)
As long as you are happy, that's all that matters in my book.

If you're both legal adults, then there really isn't any problem with the law. You just have to remember the gap, and that somethings may fail because of the age difference. Having children in the future is an example. If, when you decide you are ready to have a child, your boyfriend (hopefully, at that point, husband) may not be able to produce enough sperm to fertilize, which could create strains in the relationship.

@HXC; I have a boyfriend who is about three years older than me as well. Two and a half I guess. I'll be a junior this school year, and he's enrolled in college.

Then we are in the same predicament. I will be a junior at my school as well this year and my boyfriend is in the Army(basic) as we speak.

I don't think that age differences are a problem later in life. In your case, it's a little different, but only because you and your boyfriend have different priorities right now. You're probably looking to enter college, while your boyfriend is at the age where people try to start families and hold a stable career. However, later in life, age differences aren't really a big deal. My aunt and uncle have a thirty year age difference and everything is great between them. I feel bad for their kids, though, who are thirteen and nine, who may grow up later on without a father, since he is in his early seventies.

My boyfriend is three years older than me, but it's not much of an issue anymore. -shrugs- My parents freaked out at first (I was fourteen when we started dating), but now it's not much of an issue, as I'm seventeen now and will be going to college soon anyway.

my parents dont know we are dating yet adn we have been dating for 5 months now

May I ask where you met your boyfriend?

up at where i camp, he's been camping there sense he was my age

I believe that age doesn't matter, but to an extent. I suppose it would depend on the maturity of both parties involved in the relationship though. I know me and my boyfriend are about a 3 year difference. Me 15, and him 18, but we've been together for almost a year now, and have talked about everything in our relationship and are very mature about what goes on.

It seems like it's a big difference now but when you get into 20s and 30s it becomes more unnoticeable.

Depends on the ages, I guess. If you're, say, twenty and he's thirty, then no one really cares. I suppose it's not a big deal, unless you're under sixteen and he's not.

i don't think its that big a deal. as long as your both happy and legal adults. take my parents for instance, 8 year difference and they got married.

@Toxic;; Ah, well okay then. Just making sure that you didn't meet him online. D: Make sure you're safe about your relationship, though. I know that a main concern about having an age difference is that the older participant often will try to pressure the younger one into stuff. Just be careful, you know? C:

Well if it's all legal then hey, who cares? I always date older than myself. I don't do it on purpose, it just happens for some reason. o_O *Shrug* The oldest difference I had was nine years apart. My parents were fifteen years apart and my grandparents were nine years apart. Not a huge deal.

To me 17 seems a little young to be with a 27 year old, but then again, it's no different really than being 20 dating a 30 year old so.. yeah. It's maturity levels really. Men are just so... dumb, at any age, that it never seems to make a difference.

You're already 17 but still, a lot of times being underage (where I live adulthood is at 18) leads to girls dating skeevy older guys that can't get anyone their own age because they're so ick that no one with any idea about them would go near them. As long as he's not a greasy scumbag, it's probably alright.

As long you both are adults then go for it =3 I don't know why younger girls go for older guys and vice versa, can't the creepy old men go for someone their own age? Would let the young guys like me finally find someone!

The reason people date it to find the person they want to be with. What does it matter if he is 10 years older or younger? The reason why we date is to find the person we want to be with. Surly, this love fest would end one of these days and if not and you love him very deeply and you guys happen to have gotten married, then hip-hip-HURRAY! I think it is very dumb for people to judge on the age difference and how it is unholy and sh-t. Stick it up their asses and you two be happy, okay. Dating is dating and, of course, we will get heart broken in the end. No use avoiding such tragedy.

the reason we have alot in common is because he wasn't able to finish school (cause he effed off alot and they kicked him out his sr. year and he refused to go to the other school around where he lives cause it's a shyt school. so he got his ged) we have the same taste in music, and out look on life, i'm alot more mature then most 17 year old cause in a sense i was forced to grow up cause of problems home, i have an ill parent. so i had to take the roll of my mother almost. he still lives home cause last time he lived out on his own his last gf he was with effed him over big time, he is in debt cause of her. bla bla bla so you get what i'm saying..

It depends on their ages specifically.

If you're over eighteen years old (or whatever age you're considered an adult where you're from), honestly, I'd think you're mature enough to make your own decisions.

If you're a minor, you have to think about it more. 13 and 18? Err, some things might not just work out.
I think it depends more on maturity than age, though.

The older 2 people are, the less an age difference matters. In 7th grade, my teacher asked us who in class had parents who were the farthest apart in age, and everyone freaked out when I said that my parents were 15 years apart. One girl said "that means your mom was 10 when your dad was 25." But I said "But when they got married, they were 25 and 40, so that doesn't matter as much."
I personally think an age gap of 10 years for someone your age is a bit creepy. But I don't know why, because that would not be as bad if you were the older one and he was 10 years younger than you. Just make sure you are seeing him for who he truly is and that his reasons for dating someone your age aren't...you know, bad.

Oh, and someone mentioned fertility, and I should say that that isn't something to worry about as you get older if you want children, because even 90-year-old men have been known to reproduce. The chances are that if you are eventually thinking of having kids with him, he'll still be only in his 40s and fertility wouldn't be a problem.

It really all depends on the age of the people and the maturity of those said people. Being seventeen and having a ten year gap seems a little much to me...but as long as it's leagl, it's not too bad. As the above person mentioned...the older the two people the less age really matters. I myself have only dated above my age by 5 years...although I did have a huge crush on this man that was about...nineteen years older than me. He liked me a lot too...but in the end I decided it was too much of a gap for me to seriously consider. I don't think that age should matter when it comes to real love...but the biggest problem with those sorts of age gaps are that you're in two different walks of life. Like...I'm 20, and I want to travel the world and get my degree and he's all settled with a permanent job and he wants to get married (again) and have a couple kids before he gets too old. I did have a man forty years older than me flirt and want to get married...but he just totally weirded/freaked me out. He was pretty creepy.

Just be a little careful of older guys...they will often pressure the younger one into things they're not ready for...or settling down when you don't want that for another few years.