![]() |
My poetry...
Anxiety can't catch your breath the walls are closing in pins and needles all through your skin your muscles tense your stomack flips your heart races your mind slips your lips quiver your palms sweat everything around you seems like a threat it's just your nerves it's all in your head no one understands you'd rather be dead |
Coming out
coming out
It’s not an illness Of that i am sure So you need to know You wont find a cure Yes i am different I may not fit in But last time i checked That wasn’t a sin I’m still the same girl I was years ago This doesn’t change who i am But i need you to know I’ve fallen in love We’re tying the knot What can i say I love HER alot |
Since each user is only allowed to create one Poetry thread, I've gone ahead and merged your's together. Please update this topic with all of your new works. :yes:
|
haunted by memories
tossing and turning unable to sleep haunted by memories i don't want to keep i remember the night i got the black eye you swore up and down next time i'd die the yelling and screaming the bruises and tears i can't believe i stayed all those horrible years at that point i knew this all had to end i packed up my bags went to stay with a friend you stalked and you prowled you wouldn't go away i still watch my back to this very day one call to the cops they locked you up tight but still my memories haunt me tonight |
Blocked
my mind is blank my page is bare hour after hour I sit and I stare a common illness every artist will face sadly however this is my worst case my frustration builds my mind seems to slip page after page I tear and I rip my mind is frozen active as a rock you know what I mean I'm cursed with writer's block |
Your work is incredible. I love how you write. You should look into getting your work published.
|
@kigome - oh my, thank you so much. i'm flattered.
|
confused
I want to run but I don’t know where to go. I want to cry but I don’t want people to see my tears. I want to scream but I don’t want anyone to hear me. I want to tell you but I don’t want you to know. I want it stop but I don’t know when it started. I want to hate you but I love you. I want to die but I don’t want to leave everything behind. I try to please everyone but I can’t do anything right. I want to get away from it all but I don’t know what I’m running from. Sometimes I think I have no one to turn to. i wrote this a long time ago for a school project |
Actually, if you went to a publisher, they'd laugh at you.
Not to be rude, but it's true. You have good starts, but it's old hat. All of it's been said, done, and cried over before. You poetry uses little, if any, poetic devices and is dire need of them. This is an art form so make it into that! Make it worth reading and enjoying. This is you! You're life. You're experiences; not the reader's. Keep that in mind when you're writing, becasue we have NO clue how this same, boring thing that we all go through inpacted you as it does everyone differently. And that's the beauty of poetry; taking a cliche and making something amazing. You have to SHOW your reader what's happening by using imagery and metaphors and words invloving all of the senses to really give it that UMPH! I'm not saying this either to make you stop, just to improve, so:: you're work sucks. Everyone's does when they first start. And like with drawing, you get critiqued and get better as you go on. I suggest reading more poetry than just Poe and Dickenson. Try new age poets to spice things up. Pay attention how they use diction and explain what's happening to them and around them. Look up poetic device websites (( I can give you some links)). Learn, Edit, Improve. |
All times are GMT. The time now is 10:17 AM. |