|
The Meaning of Love
I could find no better place to post this thread than here on the Debate forum, but it might not necessarily belong in Debates. I think it does, though. Anyways.
Times are rapidly changing. Scientific advancements are seeing expedient progress, social movements and freedoms are seeing progress, and political views are changing. However, one thing remains the same, and that is the universal concept of "love." Since the dawn of man, love has been a concept that has existed. To clarify, when I say "love" in this post, I am talking about romantic/sexual love. In modern times, we see many romantic couples of all ages, but most often in the teenage years, who rush into love. There are even couples in their thirties and up who do this. They say "I love you" a week or two into the relationship and think little of it. This sort of rash action is not new. If we follow history, and more notably literature, back thousands of years, we see that people have always done this, irrational as it is. I realize that older literature much exaggerated life, especially all English literature prior to the Renaissance. However, no matter the subject matter of the plot of their stories, writers have always written to reflect the world around them. Even Shakespeare (the stories he didn't plagiarize) and especially Chaucer. However, in modern times, we do have this pretty modern groupthought as independence and the concept of "career" becomes important throughout the United States, as well as the world, that people use the word "love" too much and too rashly. There are many that are cynical of love because of how easily people take it for granted and how quickly people "fall in love." But people have always treated love like this. As I stated, this cynicism is a modern outlook. There are some that argue that people don't necessarily use the word "love" too much, but instead they use "love" according to their definition of the word. While the cynics would instead argue these people don't know the true meaning of love. Basically, the pro-lovers state that everyone has their own meaning of love, and it is up to the discretion of the individual to decide whether or not they are in love, while the cynics state that these people merely experience infatuation, and argue that these people do not actually experience, or even know the meaning, of true love. Some cynics go so far as to say that true love does not exist at all. There is also the notion of "love at first site." The cynics argue that this is just a myth--a fairy tale. The pro-lovers argue that this is a real phenomenon, and again it is up to the individual's experience. Where do you stand on this? Do you believe in love? Do you believe in love at first site? Do you believe that "rash lovers" truly fall in love, or are they just deluding themselves? Are you a pro-lover, or a cynic? |
I don't say I love someone unless I mean it. It takes me a while to get attached enough to people to say it. This throws a lot of people off because it seems like people I date tend to tell me that they love me long before I even feel anything for them outside of friendship.
I'm kind of a hopeless romantic type and I really want to believe that there's such thing as "love at first sight" but the logical part of me says no since it's not likely to happen. I think that the stresses of every day life has to do a lot with "love" as well. The reason I say that is because although one may love someone it doesn't mean it's going to work out romantically. At this point in my life I'm more of a cynic although I do love the idea of romance and finding "the one" or finding someone that I can even stand to be with romantically long term but that's yet to happen. |
Quote:
Not sure where I found that quote but it's become a favorite of mine. I believe in love. I'm in it right now, sure it's not perfect, but it's perfectly imperfect and thats why I love it. I believe there can be a 'love at first sight' in a sense. I'm not sure if that always leads to a fairy tale ending, I don't even know if it works with humans, but my older sister saw a picture of a french bulldog and said thats my dog, and bought her a week later. 1 year later they are the most amazing pair. Same with my mom and her white boxer, it was love at first sight. But people can lie about themselves way to easily. People hide parts of themselves and for love to come they have to open up completely and fully. But yes I do believe in love. Fully and entirely. Edit: later posts make me feel that I should add that I've been in the same relationship for 3 years and we didn't actually start with 'I love you' 's until after 4 months. It's a relationship of respect and familiarity and I do want to use the word love, because I feel more of a connection to him then I do my own family. |
I am more cynic about it since I am a teen and I see it alot.
My friends call me the "girl who knows about love." I don't think anyone knows the true meaning of love and eventhough my friends say that, I KNOW I do not. It may be because I use love to express my feelings toward someone rather than rashly throwing it out there. When I say that I love someone, it means that I care deeply for them and that I wouldn't mind doing anything for that person. For example, I love you Alice. I would do anything for you eventhough I haven't known you for a very long time. You have been here for me in my times of need and I love you as a person and as a friend. In other words I use it in affectionate ways toward my boyfriend. I love him as a person but I always tell him that I am not in love because frankly... I am not. We haven't been dating very long and I try to explain to him my views on it. He is sort of a "rash lover" so to say while I am more reserved. I know it is not 100% but the most people I know that have been through alot of bullshit in their life are cynic about love while the ones who haven't rush into things. I don't think that the people who barely know eachother and have been dating for a week love eachother... Hell no. They are simply trying to rush everything and all it leads to is a broken heart and a broken person. If you never truly get to know the person you never really know them. I used to throw out "I love you" all the time and it led to my fall in the end. Love is hard to explain. Love can never truly be defined in my opinion and love will always be hard to understand. This generation basically "mocks" love in my opinion. They make it seem like it is a meaningless word to throw around and girls think love is when you meet your prince. Guys think love is when you just get to fuck a girl everyday. (Not everyone but this is from observations at my school.) Society makes love seem like it is all about sex, princes, and magical things. It doesn't happen that way and people need to wake up and see that what they think is love is not actually love. I may not make sense but that is only because I don't know how to make sense out of my thought on love. When I love someone, truly love someone... I would like to think that I know that person the best I can, they treat me right, and we can support eachother. I know alot of people who think they are in love... eventhough the person they "love" beats them, makes them bleed, abuse, and all of these other things. I have actually seen my friend killed because of this so called "love" she had for this guy. The guy basically gave her to his friends, and they raped her. One guy ended up chocking her to death... and this was supposed to be someone that she loved... someone that so called "loved" her back. Again, people will never know the meaning but that is just my opinion. Society will always try to morph it... and the generations to come are going to become stupider and more clueless about love... I just know it... Another example, (I may get alot of hate for this.) Taylor Swift... The sweetheart... Her songs make girls seem weak... they make love seem like a fairy tale... I know some songs are about the heartbreak and break ups but the songs about "love" are complete bullshit... No one is going to come on a white horse, no one is going to be perfect.... On the otherhand I love her music it is just the message some of her songs convey are... are... bullshit. Songs in general convey love in different ways: Most rap I listen to Love=Sex,drugs, and sex sex sex Most love songs love=easy life, fairy tale Pop love = hurt, sex, fairy tale It just repeats. I listen to alot of music... I don't know everything I know that... It is just hard to convey my feelings about it... I have been hurt but I have also been built back up by love... Love from parents Love from friends Love from my boyfriend Love is a powerful thing and people need to stop treating it like it is nothing and that it is easy. It is hard to forgive and love again. Love takes trust... Love takes and open heart and mind... I am sorry... It just makes me mad... I am only 15 and to be thrust into this world of sex, violence, and liars... It sucks. To hear teens throw I love you around like it is nothing EVERY DAY sucks... Seeing people die based on the "love" they had for someone sucks... Then again, that is just MY opinion and you have every right to disagree. |
I always found that type of teenager/anyone abhorrent. Even when i was a teenager surrounded by it. Now i find people still do the same kind of thing, yet i'm in two minds about it.
My boyfriend, the love of this life and several before, told me he loved me within a few days of being together. I wouldn't say it back until i was sure. It didn't take long though, and it made me rethink the whole 'Being together a month and saying you love somebody' situation. We talked a lot about it too, how we felt and such like. Most of the time i don't believe that 98% of people mean it, but of course the meaning of love is wholly subjective even if a dictionary would try to define it. Unless you talk about what it means for you personally with the person you're saying it too/who won't say it to you etc, then i think confusion will certainly arise. For me love was as much about how i felt when i lose somebody as when i am with them. I think of life without Oz and it physically hurts me to contemplate it. It was the same for the person i first loved before him. I think a massive part of the issue is people not accepting that it's okay to be in a relationship while in that stasis between 'like' and 'love'. For me the difference is clear, and the principles i live by mean i would never lie about it. And lets face it, anyone starting out at relationships needs to learn what love feels like for them, so maybe they actually believe it. I don't begrudge them too much, but i would certainly treat my own children what i feel the greater aspects of love are. I personally think you need to sample a smidgen of all of them to truly understand love and say it with conviction. As for love at first sight. Not sure. I believe in 'spiritual connection' at first sight, and that you learn something greater about life from each connection you make, however strong it is. Most of the time i think it's more physical attraction that spiritual, buy my personal belief is that if you have nothing to learn from it you wouldn't be guided toward it. |
I believe in lust at first sight, infatuation in the early stages of romantic relationships and love when all of it stabilises and you can still be with that person once all the sunshines have disappeared.
I'm a cynic to the popular view. I think there are other ways 'love' can be formed such as in the case of arranged marriages. My partner and I are not into brash lovers. We chose each other despite not having that much of an attraction to one another, or having any romantic interest either but out of mutual respect, 'love' as friends (we didn't like but adored each other as or own flesh and blood), care and so on. Eventually that grew into infatuation and other things. It's really what works out in the end for people. I've seen more cases of infatuation being mistaken as love however and the word has really lost its meaning nowadays. |
Well, first we have to look at several different types of love. Someone can love ice cream. Someone can love a tv show. Someone can love a book. And of course, a person can love another person. Love is a spectrum. Some types of love people approve of, and there are other types of love that people do not approve of, like same sex, interracial, interfaith, etc. In short, I do not think love can be simply defined by one meaning. It is something with mutliple defenitions.
|
Quote:
|
I think falling in and out of "love" is ridiculous. There is a very clear historical and etymological basis to this, but this take it from this perspective, since "romantic love" was mentioned. The greeks had four words for love: agape, eros, philia and storge. Agape means a love that is unconditional and godly, wanting the best for that person regardless of what they do. Eros means lust (but is also called the erotic or marital or romantic love), simply put. It is a sexual desire.
Philia means to like, a friendly love, but this is not exclusive to friends. It could be someone whose character you like (a friend), someone you do business with (store owner) or someone you just hang out for fun but would not be around if there was not something you can both do (racing buddy for instance). The last is storge and it is normally describes as natural love between family or, I think, between one human to another, like if you were to find someone dying on the side of the road and you suddenly have the urge to help them. These are what I use: love, lust, like and care, though there are probably better translations that I am not aware of. |
| All times are GMT. The time now is 09:19 PM. |