If you dont bring anything to the table...
 

You don't get to eat.

Not a perfect philosophy but kind of how I feel. Pitching in and pulling your own weight - it's important.

Word. I wholeheartedly agree with you. Not that I'd tell people they can't have any food if they don't help me set the table or whatever, but whenever I'm away somewhere and somebody asks me to stay for dinner, I always help out. Not sure why some people seem to think they're above that sort of thing. :/

It's a good philosophy, especially now when so many people are super entitled, and seem to feel they're owed everything that they want, without having to put in any effort, just because they're breathing. [sweat]

ooh that reminds me of a kid that hung out with my brother and would DEMAND things of us (give me this or let me have that) and say "you HAVE to I'm the guest." He never pulled it around grown ups though because the answer to that is... you can leave now.

It depends if people can contribute.
I used to have a lot of philosophies that were about work, and strength and all. When i was younger though I was strong. I weightlifted, and I was a foot messenger, so I would walk all around the island all day, then walk downtown and go dancing.

Then I got sick. And everything I used to believe went out the window. It had to, because if I'd remained a Darwinist the only option would be suicide. By my own philosophies, I was no longer worth being alive. I was a burden.

I'm not gonna get all social justice-y, but one must consider their privilege, because a lot of those types of philosophies are woefully ableist.

There are handicapped people, yo. and the injured. And the poor. Some of them are there from laziness or their own stupidity, but even if they are, that's their own mindset now, isn't it? If they aren't at least helped a little they may never get back on their feet.

And some of us? May never get back on our feet, because circumstance means we have no feet to stand on, either figuratively or, in some cases, literally.

It's hard to not be bitter and, at times, ungrateful if you do have to rely on others. But the assumption that anyone who can't pull their own weight is simply no good is a messed up thing. Ok, maybe they can't walk, or earn, or help with the housework, etc. but who is to say that makes a person utterly worthless? If we went purely by mobility, wouldn't Steven Hawking be useless?

There are plenty of people whose body is of no use to them anymore, but who can contribute richly in terms of what they can think up. There are artists, scientists, coders, etc. who don't necessarily contribute in strongarm ways, but who still contribute.

And then ok, let's say there's some folk who absolutely don't have anything to bring. They have no or decreased mobility. And on top of that they have no real skills they can contribute anymore, either through infirm, or the very real depression that comes with the realisation you can't contribute anymore. Shouls we just throw them to the wolves?

To me, proof of a person's character isn't how they treat their fellow contributors. It's how they treat someone who is helpless, or who can give nothing back. That is real empathy, and to me empathy is what determines a person as good or not.

Vera can't even get a job, and if she didn't have friends who could help then she couldn't take care of me.

I always feel like a burden. I think she does, too. I know she says it sometimes.

She used to hurt herself because of it, and said she didn't deserve anything.

I think that if a person tries their best, it should be enough. But if they never even try, then someone needs to spank their butt and make them do something.

Yep, that's the distiction I make. A lot of people now seem to be of the mindset that they don't need to try, not to gain anything at all, they just stand their with their hand out, and pitch a fit when they don't get handed stuff on a plate, like what the hell?

If you don't bring anything to the table, at least you can set the table, cook the food, and wash the dishes afterwards.

*nods*

'S'what I do.

Oh, and the laundry, the sweeping, pet care, dusting, and such.

Makes getting a job so much more appealing, lol.

People with entitlement issues make me rage.

I think it depends on situation.
If you are someone like my mom, who really really tries to give people money and food and everything but sometimes can't even afford to pay her bills... Then it's not fair to expect this. But if you are like my sister, working two jobs and can afford a brand new car and to go partying and all that crap, then you should be expected to bring your own something to the table.

Well it's a metaphorical table and you can bring a lot of intangible things. Personally, I was thinking about people who take advantage or act entitled. I didn't specify what I was angry about because I was keeping things general. Honestly even simple appreciation and enthusiasm would be bringing something.

I said it wasn't a perfect philosophy. The metaphor was myopic and I didn't mean to offend. I was only seeing things from my point of view. Feeling slighted about tons of life stuff and ranting in abstract. In a literal interpretation Vera hits on exactly what I had been thinking. If you can do something, do it, or at least offer.

It's the able bodied yet expectant of others to take up their slack that were bumming me out.

What she said.

Naturally, this philosophy cannot be expected to apply to every human being on the planet, and I believe that anybody with a good common sense in their heads would agree with us on this.

I, too, only had the spoiled brats, able-bodied and all, in mind when I thought of this. My whole life, I've been around people with various illnesses or handicaps, so I know very well what it might be like, being unable to help eventhough one might want to. And I am most definitely not talking about people like them.

This is a good motto, I like this. [:)] I can't say that I always live up to it - sometimes I'm deadweight. But I think I'll have to give this phrase a good think and try to apply it more.

Everyone has the right to be deadweight occasionally, so don't beat yourself up about that. But there are people out there who habitually just shrug and let everyone else do everything, and a lot don't even see anything wrong in that. Those are the people I want to kick off a cliff. [illgetu]

Off the planet!! Into space and made to pick up the debris floating around or they don't get any freeze dried food stuffs.

Oh, no, no, I'm not seeing this as an opportunity to beat myself up, rather as one to improve and make myself a better person. Thinking about this motto could drive me to be a better guest/friend/family member/etc. Not to beat myself up, just to put it into my mind to make more of an effort.