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-   -   I'm not that creative~ (https://www.menewsha.com/forum/showthread.php?t=52780)

c0rpse 04-12-2007 01:16 AM

I'm not that creative~
 
Yet i took creative writing, and i would love it if some of you told me what you liked or how i could improve my writing~

c0rpse 04-12-2007 01:22 AM

This assignment was to wright a ghost story. I got carried away and started to wright a horror story instead. But I liked the way it sounded so just continued, adding in a ghost later. I wanted to add more to it, but it was late and I also wanted to finish before my mom had a canipship!
Here it is:


As the lights flickered on and off the two remaining girls cower in the corner. Sobbing softly, Jamie clung to Heather for life and limb. They didn’t know what happened to there other friends, they didn’t really care at this point, they were to afraid to do anything else but cower, praying, and hoping that there was a way out. The girls started to sob as they hear something coming closer. They heard something dragging down the hall, they were sure it was the axe covered in there friends blood.
It had started out as just a simple dare, but then again, don’t all horror stories? The girls and there friends had been dared by who knows. They couldn’t recall who now that they were in danger. But they had been dared to go into that spooky old house, even though they knew it was haunted. Then again, before this happened, they though it was just another fake. There couldn’t really be a haunted house in such a small town when there was nothing else there.
So it began as Heather, Jamie, Jonathan, Brandon and Sue all went into that cold little house at the end of that street, near a graveyard no less. Oh there were the warning signs: the black cats, ominous sounds, creaky everything, even a spook in the window. Yet they still trespassed and now… well now only the two survived in the back room with no possible way out.
After seeing there friends die two by the hand of this maniac coming down the hall and one having fallen to his death through two rotted floors and into the basement riddled with broken glasses and chairs and chains. The later of said events had freed this crazed thing from its disheveled, incomplete grave and sent the rest scattering deeper into this maze like house. Getting lost, the girls knew there was no possible way out.
The scraping continued, they almost started to wish that He would come in and just finish them off, but He didn’t, though the scraping continued until finally Heather dared to open her eyes. If she had the courage to scream, she would have. The disembodied figure standing in front of her was like nothing ever seen on screen. He… It was pointing toward something covered at the back of the room. She shuddered, shaking her friend.
In a whispered hush she shook her friend saying, “Jamie! Jamie look, there’s something in the room! Just look!”
As Jamie looked up she started to scream, Heather quickly covering her mouth incase the killer was near.
“Jamie! I think, I think he’s trying to help us. Let’s just go, ok?”
“But,” she protested, “but, what if, its working for Him and is just trying to get us killed. We can’t trust this house!”
“We can’t just sit here waiting to die! At least let’s try to get out now. Even if he is leading us to death, isn’t it the same if we just stay here?!”
After some coaxing from Heather, Jamie finally agreed. The ghostly creature pointed hastily toward the wall covered in trash, knowing time was quickly running out for the two. They started clearing away the wall, tossing broken boards and rubble from the dilapidated roof to the side. Lo and behold, there in the back of the room was a way out, a window that had been nailed shut, but it was better then nothing! They began to pull at the boards with what ever they could. After a half an hour, breaking rotted boards and pealing the rest away, the glass of the window seemed like the Holy Grail. Heather took a broken board and bashed it against the window. It shattered, the girls staring at the ground, unbelieving. Jamie began to climb out but Heather turned to thank the ghost, it began to look more human, a mouth had formed. She was about to speak when she noticed that the figure was mouthing “Get out, Now! He’s coming!” Heather shrank away and dashed toward the window. She began to crawl out, and as she fell through, she heard something like an axe smashing against the door. The two girls began to run away from the house never looking back.


And thus, a three hundred word project turned into a 717 word project~

c0rpse 04-16-2007 01:26 AM

I have to admit, I am somewhat disappointed that no one has commented. Is it really that bad that you don't even dare to read it?!

upinthetrees 04-16-2007 09:22 PM

I actually liked your story. It was a little undetailed in some places, though.


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