that's a good question. i have a friend who has two kids, one of them is 2 and the other is almost 5 months old. if she got pregnant now, that would be taking a lot away from the kids she already has. both of her pregnancies were hard on her, and she had an ectopic before conceiving her youngest. should she have died and left her son without a mom? should she be forced to put her health on the line for a third child she doesn't even want?

If your friend already has two children, it shouldn't be too hard to find a doctor that's willing to tie her tubes.

If you really, REALLY don't want any more children? Nope, I don't consider it dramatic at all.

o_o Any major surgery is dramatic. Besides, what if she does want children later, but it was just bad timing?

Here's the thing, and I can guarantee that no one here is going to like it. You don't pick and choose which children you're going to love and which you aren't. Either you love all of them or you love none of them. I despise a woman who whines "Well, the time just isn't right, but hey! I'll love the next one!" In my eyes, if she's capable of justifying killing her unborn, she is not and never will be a good mother. (I would like to clarify that this does not necessarily apply to women who are forced into abortion against their will.) Mind you, I believe it is possible to STOP loving a child as they grow up, if they do something horrendous like walk into a McDonald's or a school and kill a multitude of people at random.

Poet, that frankly is where we disagree and quite frankly always will. There was a line from a story that I read once that sums up exactly how I feel. "It doesn't take any love at all to throw your baby into a trash can. It takes all the love in the world to wrap your baby up in a blanket and leave it with someone who will care for it." Since when has killing your unborn become an act of love? Really, what kind of reasoning is that? "I love you, so I'm going to kill you." BTW, best possible circumstances? You may find this hard to comprehend, but there are hundreds of thousands of people out there who aren't living in "the best possible circumstances" that are quite happy in spite of that. There's more to life than material wealth.

oh, so my friend who has three kids and aborted twice does not love her kids? how dare you! what the hell gives you the right to be a judgemental hag?

Well let's see what you got.

Actually people do do this all the time. Parents have been known to love one of their children more than their other children based on many different things, gender, intelligence, appearance, personality, attitude, etc. Have you ever heard of favoritism? It happened in my family, my step-father used to love me and my brother as if we were his own children until my youngest brother was born and he favored him and loved him more because it was his biological son. (There was a lot of mental abuse because of that after my brother was born i.e. he would tell us he's better than us and smarter etc.)

I have also heard of cases of parents having a child and one or both of the parents hating that the child wasn't born a boy or a girl. So they tend to hate the child even before or right after it is born.

http://www.news.cornell.edu/releases...itism.ssl.html
http://www.sideroad.com/Parenting/pa...avoritism.html

Your personal opinions should not affect my life choices. I could really care less who you despise and why and I'm sure most women who have abortions and children do NOT care that you may despise them.

Personal opinion. I know 5 women who have had at least one abortion in their life and turned out to be great mothers to their existing children.


Thanks for clarifying.

Well at least you acknowledge that parent's have the ability to stop loving their children.
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You want to hear an interesting story? My boyfriend's mother had an abortion when she was 22 years old. The child was with her previous husband at the time. Things were very rocky between them at the time and they both agreed an abortion was the best course of action since they were both still in college and having troubles. A child would have only made their burdens worse. So she had an abortion and about a year later she divorced her husband.

She came to Arizona (she had been in Chicago previously) to make a new life for herself and just start fresh. She met the man of her dreams and married him and had two sons with him, that would be my boyfriend and his brother. She loves them immensely and has never been happier.

She also does NOT regret her abortion for several reasons, one of them was that if she had had that child with her ex-husband she probably never would have left Chicago and would have stayed near him so he could see his child. She would have never met her late husband now and had her two sons.

In other words, if my boyfriend's mother had never had that abortion both my boyfriend and his brother would not exist as of today.

I am just curious as to what you think of that. There are many, MANY women who chose abortions early in their lives and later on had children with the same men or with different men, chances are we wouldn't have all the same people we have today if these women didn't have abortions and I wouldn't have my beloved boyfriend.

Cause and effect my friend. It changes the course of many things. But this whole thing is just an idea from potential, which is usually what pro-life bases it's stance on. I'm just throwing it out there to shake things up a little. xD

wow, this thread is dead.....grrrrr.

okay then, what's your opinions on so-called "abortion pics"?

my opinion? i've done my research enough to know that the majority of photos are faked/photoshopped, mislabeled greatly OR they are stillborns.

I am against abortion. I think it is ethically murder, and absoulutly disgusting.

murder is when one PERSON unlawfully kills another PERSON with malicious intent. the fetus is not a person, there is no malice and abortion is legal. and what makes it un-ethical? and what makes it disgusting?

Wow, this thread has moved pretty far. I'm glad to see poet in here.
I've been unactive since fanime.

But really, what makes a rape fetus any less unworthy or more worthy of an abortion?

Granted, it's up to each individual women to decide what is best for her.

1. Let me make it clear that I am ONLY speaking about abortion in America, not third world countries, where the situation is often a lot more dire. Let's look at "poverty" in America first, shall we? Understanding Poverty in America Here are a few key quotes from the article:

"The following are facts about persons defined as "poor" by the Census Bureau, taken from various government reports:

Forty-six percent of all poor households actually own their own homes. The average home owned by persons classified as poor by the Census Bureau is a three-bedroom house with one-and-a-half baths, a garage, and a porch or patio.
Seventy-six percent of poor households have air conditioning. By contrast, 30 years ago, only 36 percent of the entire U.S. population enjoyed air conditioning.
Only 6 percent of poor households are overcrowded. More than two-thirds have more than two rooms per person.
The average poor American has more living space than the average individual living in Paris, London, Vienna, Athens, and other cities throughout Europe. (These comparisons are to the average citizens in foreign countries, not to those classified as poor.)
Nearly three-quarters of poor households own a car; 30 percent own two or more cars.
Ninety-seven percent of poor households have a color television; over half own two or more color televisions.
Seventy-eight percent have a VCR or DVD player; 62 percent have cable or satellite TV reception.
Seventy-three percent own microwave ovens, more than half have a stereo, and a third have an automatic dishwasher."

"As a group, America's poor are far from being chronically undernourished. The average consumption of protein, vitamins, and minerals is virtually the same for poor and middle-class children and, in most cases, is well above recommended norms. Poor children actually consume more meat than do higher-income children and have average protein intakes 100 percent above recommended levels. Most poor children today are, in fact, supernourished and grow up to be, on average, one inch taller and 10 pounds heavier that the GIs who stormed the beaches of Normandy in World War II."

In short, poverty in America is a far cry from poverty in other parts of the world.

Now, how about disease and death?

Immunizations in America have pretty much controlled childhood diseases here in America. That first paragraph of yours may well apply to a third world country, but it has little to no bearing on abortion here in America.

As for adoption? How can anyone, unless they're arguing from potential, say "It's okay for women to have abortions, because their child MIGHT have a bad life."? Can you see the future? Do you know beyond all doubt that your child will suffer if you put it up for adoption? BTW, most children in the system are those who are TAKEN AWAY from their parents, not newborn babies put up for adoption. Those are usually spoken for before they're even born. Also, the primary goal for children in the system is to put them back with their parents or other relatives. Roughly 20% end up being put up for adoption. AFCARS Now, maybe you'd rather miss out on a whole life because you MIGHT be unhappy as a child, but I certainly wouldn't. Again, I don't buy this as a valid reason for abortion here in America.

anyone else want to comment on this? i want this thread to LIVE!

I am pro-choice. I believe everyone should have the right to choose what happens to their body. Not everyone that is pro-choice is pro-abortion, I prefer the term "Individual Liberty".