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Silvana came in through the back door, without her parents noticing her. She crept up the stairs, quiet as a mouse. At least till she got to her room. Once she got there, she stood numbly, in front of her bed. Then the tears began to flow. They streamed down her face, silently, and all the agony she had been repressing inside of her, from the night of the vampire dinner, through the brutal use of her body on the side of the road, and the close call she'd slipped through today from Melody and the others... It poured out of her, in the form of salt water. She stripped off the pajamas, throwing them into a hamper, and disappeared into the bathroom. She turned on the shower, to hide her wailing, even though she knew that sound did not carry through the rest of the house. She curled up into a little ball by the tub, in the corner, across from the toilet... Weeping and wailing and asking the gods, God, anyone, why her life was so horrible suddenly.
How could Silvana care this much about someone she had just met? Was it just because he stole everything from her? Zadist had stolen her purity, her innocence, her naivety, her ignorance... He'd stolen her dreams, her independence... She'd taken violence, verbal abuse, cruelty, evil, danger, potential death... All for him. But he had stolen everything from her, and gave nothing in return but things. Material things. Sex. And at the core of it all, it seemed that the man had even stolen her heart. And she would be haunted by the lost look on his face when he'd seen Melody, causing him to forget her. How could he protect her from something that he could not even protect himself from? After a while, the wailing subsided and Silvana's cries hushed to dry sobs. Her face was red and blotchy, stained with dried tears. She stood, weakly, and reached for the doorknob. Once, she faltered. The second time, she managed to get the door open and drop face-down onto her bed. She lay on her stomach like that, for a while. Eventually she dozed off, from her own fatigue. Perhaps half an hour later she thought to call some people from her classes and asked what homework she had missed. She pulled on a t-shirt and shorts that had already belonged to her. It was then that she noticed the bags on her floor. The vampire had been in her room...Had left her new items on the floor. And when she moved to the desk to start her homework, she saw a note scribbled in antiquated, curly script: ~Putting food at my house. I'll stop by tonight. Put a piece of paper hanging out your window if I'm welcome. Z~ The girl broke down again, sinking to her knees. She buried her face in her hands. What did she want to do? Should she give him another chance or make him leave her forever, before she got any more hurt than she was now? Within three days, she had suffered more than she'd suffered her entire life. If this was all their relationship would be, why bother? What would Silvana do? |
Zadist had fumed the entire ride home. When he did arrive, Zadist's temper was so bad, he located Cynn in his living room, before making her leave. He didn't want a female within twenty miles of him. He could only think of two reasons Silvana would have done that. She was angry with him, for following after Melody, or Melody had hurt the woman. God damn... The vampire had thought, crawling into his bed. His room reeked of her. It was like a personal pleasure and torment all in one. Zadist snuggled into his pillow, sighing softly. He'd thought Silvana would be different than Melody, never thought the girl would try and inform the police. Even though he'd messed up repeatedly. The vampire flinched, thinking back to last night. He should have expected this, truly. Why bother even stopping by her house, there wouldn't be any paper. And that was a good thing, Silvana needed to stay away from him. He'd already proved he couldn't control himself, would hurt her. And it wasn't the first time he'd done so, either... He couldn't even protect her, falling asleep when she needed him. Zadist reached over, quickly grabbing his cell phone, just in case Silvana did call. He allowed himself to sleep then, his arms gripping the pillow tightly. There wasn't much of a choice. Whether or not the paper was hanging there, Zadist would have to take her memory. At least then, maybe she would be safe from this world, safe from Zadist. |
Silvana felt like she was losing her mind. Her insides fought with one another, over the pain in her chest and the reasoning of her mind. Her mind told her that she should demand to forget Zadist because she knew that eventually something would happen to her. She would either get very hurt, or die. Her ability to confuse vampires beyond all possible comprehension could only get so far, and one of these days she was going to fail and end up worse than just badly bruised like she was now. But at the same time, her heart did not care whether or not Zadist loved someone more than her. It was too soon for him to love her more anyway, or even at all. However, he would someday. Someday Silvana could be the very thing that saved him... In the end. But she had to be strong, because only a strong person would be able to do that for a vampire.
The thing about Silvana was that she never went with the safe decision. Not because she was reckless or because she wanted to cheat death. But because she thought, when given the opportunity to prove to someone, whether it may be herself or God, or anyone, that she was stronger than the average Joe.... She needed to win. Back at the store, Zadist had asked her if she would be like Melody, if she had the intention to hurt him and leave him. She had not even conceived of doing so. But when she saw the look on his face when confronted with Melody, she'd believed... Well, the worst. But had it not been the worst part of his life? No one, not even his family, had been able to heal him from that incident. And unless Silvana stuck around, he would remain broken... For the rest of forever. And forever was too long a time for Silvana to damn him. Especially because of... Silvana had to apologize to him. Silvana thought about how Zadist had given her his number on her phone, but her phone was broken somewhere probably in the mud on the side of the highway outside of town. The only thing she could think, was tear through her trash looking for the crumpled up tiny piece of paper where he had written it to begin with, praying to the gods her mother had not already thrown it out. She searched on her hands and knees for a good forty-five minutes. And, sobbing in despair, she'd almost given up... When out of the corner of her eye, almost under her bed, so spotted a tiny little ball of paper, no larger than the tip of her finger. She grabbed it wildly and fumbled to open it, and sure enough... The number was written. The girl grabbed the phone off its stand, sitting on the floor with the paper in her hand, and dialed frantically. As the dial tone began, and the ringing, she told herself...Even if he did not pick up, she would leave him a message, And that message would resolve everything, even if she had to rant for freaking twenty minutes to do it. |
Something was piercing through Zadist's sleepy haze...With a groan, the male sat up, glancing around, before noting it was his phone. The male lifted it, flipping it open and laying back down, giving a short greeting as he did so. "What?" He muttered, inhaling deeply afterwords, shivering at Silvana's scent. His emerald eyes were shut tightly once more. Luckily, the sun would be down soon. Zadist could take care of this all, and go on his merry little way. |
He answered. The girl trembled for a moment, unable to say anything. Her eyes started to water, and she managed to croak out a small, "Hi." But the tears threatened to pour our again, in torrents, and she could barely stand to keep them back. And so she just ranted like she'd intended to do. "Hi, it's me. I didn't have your number, so I searched the floor for a while for that little piece of paper that you gave me and then discarded. I almost didn't find it but it was under my bed, uhm--"
"--Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry about earlier. I was scared, and I took four vampires on by myself and survived, because I'm apparently cooler than I thought, and I did it for you. I only got mad because I thought you still loved Melody. When you saw her, you looks so lost. And even when I spoke, my presence did not even register for you, and it hurt me so badly... But it's okay if you still do love her. I care about you, a lot, more than I can understand. And I'll totally throw Nitric Acid in her eyes if you want, to get revenge for her hurting you, and--" Wow, none of it was coming out the way she wanted it to. Silvana started to cry. Yup. On the phone. And sniffling. She started wiping tears from her eyes with the back of her head. "...I don't know what to say, I sound retarded... Sniff.... Do you hate me?" |
Zadist had been about to snap to whomever had called when Silvana spoke up, and instead the male jerked upwards, rubbing his eyes. He listened quietly, before sighing and standing, tugging on clothes and such. "Silvana, I could never hate you. I don't love her, at all. I'm simply confused when it comes to her. I don't under how she could do that to me. I'll be right there, alright?" |
Silvana was not sure if she believed the vampire. Part of her still thought that he did not like Silvana anymore and that he would leave her himself. Whether or not he still loved Melody, it was an ever-present issue. The vampire could easily change his mind, and had did so a lot over the three days she'd known him. She rubbed her eyes, wondering what she could say further to him when he came... To prevent him from taking another course of action. Maybe he thought she was weak now. Or he could think that... The danger involved was still too intense for the girl to handle and so... Her memories. Silvana said "bye" quickly and hung up the phone, fretting for herself. Maybe if she blindfolded herself and didn't look into his eyes or...
Hid in plain view. There was the swing set in the park, and little children were there playing with their parents even in the evening. And... She could always run away, jump on the bus, if he did not accept her apology and tried to disappear by wiping her brain and taking his leave of her. Even if he did leave, she did not want to lose any sense of what had happened to her--it was such an important event in her life. Silvana wrote a note of her own, pasting it to the glass of her window. It read: There's a small park down the sidewalk to the south of my house. I'm going to wait on the swings for you. |
Zadist made his way quickly to the female's house, cursing when he found her note. Silvana could be so clueless about so much, why not about this? He felt like screaming aloud. He hadn't even stopped to quench his thirst. Still fuming, Zadist moved to the park, his mind made up now. Hesitating for a brief moment, the vampire stepped out, making sure he would be nice and visable, before waiting for the woman to approach him. |
Silvana was swinging slowly, in the middle of the park. She was wearing her baggy T-shirt and sportsy blue shorts. For shoes, she had ankle-high white soaks and Vans with pink flamingos on them. Her hair was sort of disheveled by the wind. She glanced up slowly, noticing the vampire standing in the middle of the park now. The sounds of children playing could be heard on the play set, not too far off. A pair of mothers chattered with each other on a blue metal bench across from it. She stood up from the swings, noting Zadist's disposition. It was one of those he took, with the stern facial expression and rigid stance, that frightened her. It warned her, perhaps, that he'd come directly to her without preparing himself first. And whatever he had on his mind now was not pleasant. She would have to think of responses to any number of possibilities, now... From asking him to count the blades of grass in the park, to ranting again, to doing another song and dance number suiting the situation. But she would let him speak first.
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Silvana was easy to spot, and Zadist stopped the groan building in him. Why'd she have to look so frightened? Maybe not frightened, but certainly wary. And tasty...The vampire eyed her, noting her windblown hair, the strange outfit. His little burst of color. Zadist growled aloud, cutting off that thought. After tonight, he would have no claim on Silvana. Slowly, again afraid she was frightened, and that was the reason she'd chosen such a public place, Zadist stepped towards her slowly. "Are you alright?" He questioned after a long moment. |
"Are you?" Silvana asked, tilting her head to the side. She felt sick to her stomach suddenly, as though her nervousness about what was going on in Zadist's mind was affecting her body now. She felt a wave of nausea, but swallowed it down. She urged herself to breathe deeply, and not let herself get caught up too much in what was happening. "Did you eat before you came?" she said, although the statement was vague enough not to alert anyone in the vicinity to consider anything abnormal. Silvana took a few steps toward the vampire. But not more than that. She was not going to fall into his arms tonight. And before she knew it, she was ranting again.
"Zadist, why do you punish me for being myself? You are upset with me when I judge you and don't accept what you are. But when I act like myself, you threaten me. I already explained to you what happened earlier. I was not going to tell the police about you. I was not scared of what happened to me... Only about your feelings for Melody." She clasped her hands together, frowning. "But I am always afraid of how you will change your mind about me. Like you expect me to act like... I dunno, someone like you, in every situation, and I can't pretend I don't have feelings and different ways of coping." |
Zadist had nodded to the first question, and shook his head to the next, before staring at her openly. "Punish...threaten? I...Silvana..." The vampire hesitated, frowning. He didn't want to explain himself to this human female. Without his willing it, Zadist found himself explaining himself anyway. "I love it when you act like yourself. I love your feelings, especially when you show me how happy you are. I...think of you as my color." The male stepped closer, reaching for her slowly, finally gripping her chin, trying to lift her face to look him in the eyes. "We are hard to change, laska. I doubt you could make me change my mind about you if you wanted to." |
"Then what are you thinking about right now?" Silvana said, averting her gaze. "I'm so open about what I think and feel about you, but I shouldn't be. If I wasn't this wouldn't be happening right now. We'd still be at your apartment, happy. I wish you would tell me what you were thinking, too, so I could try and... Reassure you." She liked thinking that she was the color in his world, if that was actually the truth. Although, from the dissatisfied facial expression, one could say that the vampire had not wanted to say anything of the sort to her, but had blurted it out. Which mean that the sentiment was true, and he was at least a little torn with the way he was behaving right now. Silvana was not blind. "I... I'm not stupid, you know, I just want you to stop changing your mind about me all the time. You make a lot of assumptions about me and..." The girl paused for a moment, stepping back from his grasp, as though she was going to say something important. Which she was. But not in the way he expected. "I don't even like her, but--"
Silvana started dancing, swaying her hips and flailing her arms around, taking a jump to the right, to the back, to the left as she sang: "'Cause you're hot then you're cold You're yes then you're no You're in then you're out You're up then you're down You're wrong when it's right It's black and it's white We fight, we break up We kiss, we make up (You) You don't really want to stay, no (You) But you don't really want to go You're hot then you're cold You're yes then you're no You're in and you're out You're up and you're down~" |
Zadist watched her silently, a tiny smile dancing on his lips, though his head was lowered so his emerald eyes were covered. When she finished, the male continued his silence for a moment, before speaking softly. "I'm thinking you don't want me touching you. I'm thinking you're so random. That I don't want to lose you, but...that I'm frightened." He frowned, pinching his nose for a moment. "And I don't make assumtions about you. Or change my mind. I just know Phayte is right, and I need to do what is best for you. Come here, Silvana." Zadist commanded, that hypnotic tone creeping into his voice, barely noticably, but compelling all the same. |
"It's not what's best for me," Silvana said. "You can't make decisions like that without my consent. It's my life. I can't say the same for you." Truth be told, she wanted nothing but for him to hold her again, tightly. She wanted to go back to his place, maybe watch a movie together. Eat something that she had purchased. Not want to be reminded of all the things that they had done today that were not horrible, but when one form of conflict arose suddenly it was all kaput. And Phayte... Admitting that Phayte was right was as good a statement as Zadist could say... That he was leaving her. And if he was leaving her, he was taking her memories of him, too.
"If you have to take yourself away from me, don't take anything else from me. I have to remember you. You marked me, and... If I don't remember, then what if someone approaches me? What if someone tries to kill me? I won't have a defense at all, or understand what is happening. You should stay till at least..." She swallowed, hoping that the vampire might see the reason in this. Maybe by then she could change his mind again, from going away. "You should stay until the marking fades. Then...If you need to, you can make me forget." Her little hands sought his, and she squeezed it slightly when she did. "I wish you would touch me, but I'm afraid of what it will do to me right now, so..." |
The vampire was quite for a few moments, before he shook his head gently. "Silvana, when it comes to your safety, I'll do what I must, with or without your consent. And someone will be there to guard you every moment, until my scent has faded from you. Completely." He hesitated for a moment, as Silvana gripped his hand gently. "Phayte is at your house. I hope you don't mind. I invited him inside...he'll make it appear that you've had the things I got you for a while. The food is being placed there, too." He moved quickly, gripping her wrist with one hand, tilting her face up with the other, and placing all the persuasion he could into his voice. Quite a lot for a vampire as old as him, "Look at me, Silvana. In my eyes, for just a second, laska..." |
Silvana could already feel the tears seeping from her eyes again. He would not be persuaded. But... She didn't want this. The stupid vampire should have known what he was getting into before he did all of this to her. She knew she wouldn't remember in a bit, so she held on to what she could, trying to convince herself she would not forget him. Even if it took her a long time to remember him, she would remember him. It was simply too important for her. She chewed on her lower lip, her body compelled to listen to him, from the hypnotic tone that she was unable to fight for much longer. Her body wanted to be close to him. She loved his eyes. Silvana knew that it was futile to resist him, because one way or another, he would catch her and he would take it all away. And so, Silvana cried.
When she finally met Zadist's eyes, she was drowning in her own tears. "I think I love you... I'll remember you again. You'll see." |
Zadist felt something inside him wrench and tear. Something he'd thought was too broken and deformed to feel. The vampire leaned over, kissing her tears away, before brushing over her lips. "No, you won't. Don't worry. You'll be safe now..." He let his emerald eyes meet hers, wrenching away every memory she held of him, from their meeting in the alley, to the very second he stood in front of her. Knowing it would take a moment for Silvana to focus, after having that much time taken away, Zadist turned, quickly striding away from the woman. He moved to her house, waking her parents up long enough to take their memory as well, then met up with Phayte in her bedroom. The male nodded to his brother, and was informed that everything was gone. No tags, no bags, some were in the hamper, some hanging, some shoved under the bed. Zadist nodded, stepping to the closest. He opened it, and selected a random stuffed animal. The brothers moved away into the night, Zadist continuing to cling to the tiny pink elephant. ~~ At the park, a tiny twelve year old girl was swinging slowly, her blond locks waving behind her, eyes that almost matched Zadist on Silvana. She seemed to be waiting patiently, though the patience was an illusion from the look the gave the male pushing her, ignoring the bite marks on the male's exposed neck. "Slow down, now, Balto." She informed him, and the human obeyed silently. |
Silvana was in the middle of the park. There were clouds overhead; they were gray. She stood beneath them, lost for words. What was she doing out here? And why did her heart feel like it was tearing in two? She could not remember... The last thing she remembered was... Sitting at the bar counter with Lucy and Marie. Had she drifted home? Droplets of water started to trickle around her...Rain. It started to rain on her, but she felt numb, holding up the palms of her hands as the moisture flowed down them. The girl could not remember feeling so empty and... Well, miserable... In a really, really long time. But if she stayed in the rain much longer, she would catch cold. She floundered for an explanation of how she came to the park, but she could come up with none.
The girl picked up one foot and started to walk, as the clouds poured down on her. Her hair stuck to the sides of her face, fighting down the irrational urge to cry. She never felt like this. What was going on? Had she hit her head? Her house was not too far away--hopefully her parents were not worried about her. Still, she moved slowly in that direction... Somehow not truly wanting to return. |
The female continued to watch carefully. As soon as Silvana had begun moving, Cynn had stepped off the swing, following her slowly, so as not to be too noticed. She didn't seem to remember...but the human looked so sad...Deciding to test it out, Cynn stepped a bit closer. "'Scuse me, Miss? Are you alright?" She beckoned to the male behind her, who moved to the ladies, holding and umbrella over their forms, despite the fact that he was getting drenched. |
Silvana heard a soft melodic voice beside her, and something shielded her head from the rain. She glanced up to see a bright purple umbrella covering her, and then a very beautiful young girl with blonde hair and vivid green eyes. She could not have been more than twelve years old. "I like your umbrella," Silvana commented with a sniffle. She stopped walking, scrubbing at her face with the back of her hand. She had no expected to run into a stranger, albeit it such a nice, concerned one in the rain. "Uhm... I should be all right..." she answered, her voice sort of breaking when she tried to speak. Silvana could not explain why it was doing that, but with her own words she experienced such despair. "I can't remember how I got into the park. But I feel like... There was something I should know."
She glanced around the streets now, which were devoid of people due to the rain. The only other person she noticed was a man standing behind the girl, with the umbrella. It looked like maybe... Her father. But he was too young. Maybe her big brother, or cousin. "I feel sad," Silvana said, though she wasn't sure why she was telling the nice, young girl this. "My name is Silvana. Thank you for asking me. But... I dunno why I am." |
Cynn waved her hand at the girl. "Oh, don't worry about that...I saw you and a friend, a girl come there. You guys went swinging and she said goodbye...Maybe you should see a doctor." The vampire suggested innocently, resisting the urge to growl at her human as he stepped too close, almost lowering the umbrella. "We'll make sure you get home okay, okay?" Her green eyes were careful, wary, and calculating. Silvana wasn't supposed to have any feeling over her lost memories. She wasn't supposed to know she'd forgotten them. Nothing. Perhaps she should let Zadist know..."Excuse me, one moment. I just want to let my brother know when I'll be..." She whipped out a dark purple cell phone, and dialed quickly. "Musíte zůstat vzhůru bit, Zadist. Ví, že na něco zapomněli ... nikdy jsem svědkem tohoto před ..." (You need to stay away a bit, Zadist. She knows she's forgotten something...I've never witnessed this before...) She hung up right after that, offering the female a smile. "There we go. Ready?" |
It sounded about right, maybe Lucy or Marie? But still, her insides writhed with an inexplicable pain. Silvana was beginning to think that after her friend left, she had tumbled off of the swing and hit her head. The girl was right--she should see a doctor. Especially if this pain kept up. It could be a growing condition from the head trauma, although it did not make sense for it to be affecting her on an emotional level. Maybe she would tell her mother when she got back. "I... Did I fall off the swing and bump my head?" Silvana asked. Her eyes watered a bit when the girl called someone on the phone, speaking in... What was that language? She tried to place it. Some European something. It sounded cool, but it made her feel worse. She paused, reaching up and touching her eyes. They were wet, and not with rain. "I think I will see a doctor, if I can. This is too weird."
She continued to walk along, beside the girl, under the umbrella. Really, it was such a nice purple color. Silvana had a nice dress like that, it didn't fit her anymore. "What's your name?" Silvana asked the younger girl, forcing a smile despite yourself. "I was just thinking... I have a purple dress in my room that matches your umbrella. Do you want to see it? It doesn't fit me anymore--maybe it will fit you." |
Cynn looked around, eying her slave for a moment before answering, giving a cousin's name. "Lye Aair is my name. And no, I didn't see you hit your head, Silvana..." She hesitated briefly, tilting her head and muttering for a few moments, finally shaking her head and shrugging. "I'd love to see the dress...So, tell me Mist-Miss. What exactly do you remember? And why do you keep crying?" She had to push, even if it hurt Silvana. Had to find out what she knew. Zadist, meanwhile, had gotten to his home, and was in the middle of a job his mother had sent over. His pale body tinted red as he sweated off his meal from a few nights ago, hanging up his phone and turning away. Now he wouldn't even be able to stand guard over Silvana. Not if she remembered anything at all... The male cracked his neck, turning back to the job at hand. Stupid made vampire would get all the pain he felt. Why should he have to give up what he wanted? Behind him, Zadist barely heard Phayte's hysterical laughter as he continued the work he had to do, the tiny pink elephant he'd taken from the female seeming to stare in disapproval. |
Silvana stared off into the distance. She did not want to think about the pain, and yet... At the heart of it all, she knew that it was important somehow. She listened quietly to Lye's questions, bringing her to the back door of her house. "Come in," she said, "I'll tell you more about it inside." She guided the female silently up the stairs, careful not to disturb her parents. The male followed along too, but he was strangely wordless... Servant-like to the girl. Silvana thought nothing of it, for some reason. All she could think about was the dress upstairs, the inquiries that she had to answer. "Sorry for the mess," she said apologetically, opening the door to room and wincing at all the items tossed everywhere. She started to rifle through her things, looking for the purple dress. That was when she came across a red-orange sundress. A beautiful dress... One that she had no memory of buying. The girl froze, holding it up... Stumbling over the absence of her memory, and suddenly she was flinging the dress aside, too scared of what she did not know, to even think about it.
"Here it is," she said finally, pulling a dress off of a hanger and holding it out to Lye. "I think it'll look really pretty on you--better than on me, anyway. I've gotten too fat for it." She sat down on the foot of her bed, rubbing her tired eyes. "I don't remember anything," Silvana said after a time. "Nothing. Zip. Nada. And I think that's why I am crying. Because... I think it was important, what I forgot. Maybe it meant a lot to me." |
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