hmmm...well, you need to practice more. the girl with the red hair should have bigger thighs+but. i am having a hard time pin pointing the flaws in your art because there are so many, but dont take that the wrong way. look at manga books and draw some of the art out from there. try doing some of death note, the art there is marvelous! i also like d. gray-man art, but lately hoshino's art has been kinda off...it looks awkward.