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iamnotspam
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Banned
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04-19-2013, 03:41 AM
*Sliiiiides in with her entry*
This is Day Three
This creature is a(n): Skunkus No-smellus Longneckus Mammalis, or the "Long-Necked Skunk"; it has no scent glands.
This is its story:
"Aliens. It's always those dem aliens, isn't it? Yed thank heyd be happy afterds theyd a'kidanapp-ed all them cows and goats and thangs, and people too, but nooo sirree. Now them space critters done gone afterds the skunks too.
And wouldn't yed thank theyd just took all them skunks and skooted rite on home and lef us alone? 'Corse not! They jes started a'messin with the skunks!....Whut d'ya mean, 'how do I know?' I know cos I was thar!....Whut?....Well I wus ovar cos I done been a'kiddanapp-ed with a skunk I was a'chasin to extarmanate! But when we wur on thar muthershepper, I jes playd dead like a dawg and watched the whole thang.
But thes story ain't about me, it's about them confounded doggone aliens! And dem monters they a'makin ovar in dem muthersheppers! So they been a'kidanappen
all these skunks, but a-par-ently they done like a'lookin at 'em, when it cum all of sudden them dem aliens faces changd and be came all agrowtesk-like. Then they a'took my skunk, the one I was gunna extarmanate, and started prodden it with some sharp pointy thangs, and I say it musta been sharp and panefull cos the skunk a'started squealin' and smellin' up the place. Well, let me tell you, them dem aliens didn't take kinely to that at all.
I mean, yed thank with them a'havin such flat faces and all, they didn't have a nose eethur. But they musta, cos thar faces be came even moren growatusker, which befor I didn't even thunk was possibull, and they pullt out these odd thangs in thar handthangs, and they a'tried to extarmanate that dem skunk a'for me, and they wur shootin all ovar place so's I prayd to God rill hard, until nuther one of them dem aliens cum in and start sayin all thes jib-er-ish, and all them aliens who wur shootin befor started a'lookin at each other'n that's when I started a'thankin the Lord Gawd Almighty like the preecher tawt us to, until I real eyesd they probly wur afterds me now!
But the Lord Gawd Almighty was good to me, and they jes cawt that dem skunk insted and put us - the skunk and I - sapratly in these kine of in-viz-abble boxes, and taken into thes room, and alreddy thar in nuther box was this thang that a'looked like a llama, I know it was a'cos I saw it in a pikture book once. Then them dem aliens took the skunk and the llama and put them in a smaller room. I caint rilly say I know whut happend afterds that, cos there was a lot of brite lites and buttons and thangs, and more a'that jib-er-ish, and I couldn't rilly see the skunk innymore, and I musta falln asleep moren once. The whole thang kine of remahnded me of a mikerowave innyway, so I thought fer sure the skunk was a'done fer.
But then they brung it out this thang that a'look like the skunk and the llama had a mutant baby. And they put it in my box. And then they put some kine of beeping thang on me, and I still caint get it off. And then they a'took the box outside and lef us there. And I had to figger out on my own how to get out of that dem box, but I did. And that, I promiss you, is the truth of how it came to be made, and nuthing but the truth."
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